Completely polarized politically - can we last?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I am in the same boat.
Kids are 10 and 13. It’s is so hard.
PPs stated “talk about something else.” Like what? Our kids for the millionth time? It is so hard to find a topic the talk about without it being incredibly superficial (weather, entertainment, etc)

And the concern is what are the kids picking up since the husbands are more vocal about these issues and watching/listening about these issues on channels that propagate their views. I feel so bad for the kids as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who disagree on politics can live in harmony. People who disagree on reality cannot. Sounds like your DH is in the latter camp.

+1 Well said. The left and right cannot agree on a common set of facts on which they base their opinions. They’re not coming to different conclusions based on the same basic information; they’re on different planets.

uh that’s not what PP said. you can be republican or democrat and agree on reality. that’s why my republican BFF and I get along.

Some stuff (on both sides) is not based in reality. Like COVID numbers - seen people on the left inflate them, people on right deny them.

Please provide your source for inflated COVID numbers.

[Anonymous]

My DH and I work in government so we see how the sausage is made every day. There is nothing wrong with being conservative vs liberal and having different ideas on how the government should operate. We think the left does silly things. However, at this point, we cannot tolerate anyone who supports Trumpism. We don’t understand how real conservatives and Republicans (which we used to be) can support 95% of his actions, and disbelieve the things they see with their own eyes and hear with their own ears (We get a lot of “he never said XYZ” and just call it fake news when someone shows them a clip). It means you never learned civics or understood anything about what the idea of America is. We actually blame the Senate more than Trump himself because the US system was set up to deal with someone who perceived themselves to be a king. Most of the R senators know better, yet they refuse to exercise their given authority as a co-equal branch of government. They should be better serving the population by showing them a proper legislative way to serve and protect the American people, instead of going along with the graft and corruption and illegality of the current WH occupant.

So yes, if I were married to a blathering Q-anon Trumpist, be gone and I’d weep because my children carried half stupid genes.

[Anonymous]

What do you mean can we survive this? You;ve been living with your racist and sexist husband and his family for 22 years I'm sure you can deal with another 20 or so.

[Anonymous]

Sorry, OP. It would be a deal-breaker for me, which I know is ridiculous. I am not encouraging you to divorce, I just wanted you to know that you aren’t alone in your thoughts. When you can’t respect your spouse anymore, it bleeds into everything. Trump is so toxic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have a hard time with a wife that didn’t recognize that I was able to have differing political views in a marriage and it wasn’t grounds for divorce. I hate this narrative that one is all good and one is all evil. If he treats you well, avoid politics. See, saved you $5000 on marriage therapy!

None of that impacts my believing you’re an insensitive, not too smart louse if you can support Trump.So I’d divorce you regardless of your points.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a tough one.

I am moderate and terrified by what I see from the progressive left and Trump right. My best friend is all MAGA and it's hard not to lump him in with the white nationalists and authoritarians who are Trumps biggest base of support. But also, I try to see it from his side: he is law enforcement and feels like Trump and Trumpism is the only one who will stand up for him. And he has a point.

That being said, my dad is also deep down the Fox News rabbit hole of conspiracy theories. I keep him at arm's length and I have lost respect for him. It's much easier to distance from your parent than your spouse. I don't have sex with him.

I have an LEO friend who is never Trump, you can be an officer of the law and not support his trash, so your friend is an asshole. Accept that about him and accept that you are OK with it.

I’m a former LE manager (Federal) with numerous LEO friends who despise Trump. LEOs who support a Trump are imo assholes who do not respect the rule of law, which they swore to uphold.

[Anonymous]

I broke up with a woman I was dating when she started down the Q anon rabbit trail. She's gone off the rails and its super unattractive.

Divorcing a spouse and mother of my children is a whole other question. Will this end when Trump is gone? Can you wait out this insanity? What about an agreement not to put on cable news in the house? I bet if you turn off Fox he will stop being so irritable and easily triggered for arguments.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I broke up with a woman I was dating when she started down the Q anon rabbit trail. She's gone off the rails and its super unattractive.

Divorcing a spouse and mother of my children is a whole other question. Will this end when Trump is gone? Can you wait out this insanity? What about an agreement not to put on cable news in the house? I bet if you turn off Fox he will stop being so irritable and easily triggered for arguments.

Personally, I could never respect a spouse again knowing they supported a sociopath like Trump as President. It would be like staying with someone who cheats. Even if the affair is in the past, you will always have that lack of trust and doubt creeping in. Supporting Trump is indicative of a severe lack of judgement, common sense, and basic decency that I wouldn't be able to see past even if/when Trump wasn't a daily topic anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do people internalize this stuff so much? I am a leftist with conservative friends. Just don’t go there. There are a million other things to discuss.

I'm a leftist with conservative friends, but people who support Trump are not "conservative."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do people internalize this stuff so much? I am a leftist with conservative friends. Just don’t go there. There are a million other things to discuss.

I'm a leftist with conservative friends, but people who support Trump are not "conservative."

I make the same distinction. Conservatives, yes. Magas, I can't respect.

[Anonymous]

This can be tough, although my spouse shares my political views, I have a child who supports Trump and other family members in law enforcement who think the problem with police brutality is "we gotta learn how to act when interacting with police."

My family is African American so the Trump support is especially galling.

I actually like arguing, as long as it's civil, so I don't mind sparring with the Trump, thin blue line family members on occasion. If it was my spouse, however, that might be different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do people internalize this stuff so much? I am a leftist with conservative friends. Just don’t go there. There are a million other things to discuss.

I'm a leftist with conservative friends, but people who support Trump are not "conservative."

I make the same distinction. Conservatives, yes. Magas, I can't respect.

I agree Conservative does not equal Trump, unfortunatley Conservatives brought this on themselves when too many of them embraced Trump instead of denoucing him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do people internalize this stuff so much? I am a leftist with conservative friends. Just don’t go there. There are a million other things to discuss.

Perhaps some people are content in a marriage where a number of topics are off the table, but I don't think I could be happy that way.

[Anonymous]

Political disagreements are one thing-- celebrating someone for murdering protesters is on a whole other level, and I can't imagine being able to maintain love and respect for someone like that. That's horrifying. I'd suggest you get out now.