DD has few goals in life
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Anonymous
This would be my only worry. Honestly I’d do anything to prevent my child from taking out huge loans. You can’t always forbid them but I’d do my best. As for the rest, imho you should be grateful she isn’t mentally ill, is not trying to become a man, isn’t on drugs, or failing her classes. |
Anonymous
Well, there’s the other extreme, waiting until marriage. At 20 it’s ok but some people get stuck in the mindset into their 30s |
Anonymous
This is the world we live in though. Most people don't want to think much or be truthful to others. They use people, think they have tons of choices so are fickle, and either fall hard one way only to regret their choices later or play the field for as long as they can. There really isn't a large pool of well thinking, hard working, caring, and stable people out there to marry and if they are this way half of them are playing around for years till they find the one. |
Anonymous
which cultures are these? I am a Pakistani, my mother would've made me stay home if I had refused to wear a hijab so very very conservative but she would've also blown a gasket and insisted I got to college AND dress modestly! we have arranged marriages and anyone who doesn't go to college and doesnt have 'goals' is considered a loser and no-one would want their son to marry them. it doesn't matter if they never work or are not allowed to work after the marriage- if they are like I just want to get married beforehand and stop at high school they would be considered too stupid, lazy and undisciplined to run a household and raise kids. running a functioning household and raising kids is difficult- just being a "soft girl' isn't going to cut it. you aren't a prostitute- you are going to be a mother which is requires ingenuity and smarts! an accounting a math degree might actually be great if AI doesnt take all the jobs, can be vey flexible so you an focus on running your home. in. most conservative cultures you are supposed to have a life and then when you get married you make sacrifices to run your household efficiently and your spouse makes sacrifices to pay for everything. OP youshoudl be guiding your daughter in what traits she should look for in a partner and how to structure her life. teach her skills that she will need or want - get her some home making skill books and practice teh stuff, that way you will remain close. teach her your family recipes. |
Anonymous
Those women can also be unmotivated with no career losers as well. Nobody is arguing with DD’s approach to finding a relationship and husband, but rather her lack of any career goals or motivation. Also, as others have pointed out, not only do you get to marry this unmotivated woman, but you get the added prize of all her student loans. What a catch. |
Anonymous
| I wish that my son would meet someone like your daughter, OP. He's in the middle of completing an engineering degree, but all he truly wants is his own family. |
Anonymous
Cool. Why does he want his own family? What does he anticipate being his role in the marriage and new family? What are his other marriage expectations? |