| IRL, what are people supposed to refer to you as if they don't know you (and your name)? Miss? Won't some people get offended if we're assuming genders at this point? It's gotten so ridiculous at this point what people are uptight about and it seems like many are just sitting around waiting to be offended.... |
It's not rocket science. People who have manners never use those terms to talk to women. No one NEEDS to refer to anyone as dear, sweetie, etc. It's a habit you developed and you can stop anytime. |
I'm not advocating for anything one way or another. Just asking what are the "acceptable" references so as not to set anyone off. |
Taking offense at every little thing is also a habit you developed and can stop at any time. The vast majority of people who use these terms at this point are women who were socialized into it by the expectation that they be friendly and motherly to people even in professional settings. |
Stop saying offensive things and people won't be....offended. I can't believe I have to spell this out for grown-ups. Are you really THiS STUPID? |
i have gone my whole life without using those terms. You walk into a room and say "good afternoon, how are you?" instead of "good afternoon, sweetie. How are you?" It is THAT simple. |
Eh. The spelling correctors dint bawthur. Me either. |
So we've gotten to a point in humanity where we can't attempt to relate and/or appreciate anyone and need to just go completely impersonal in every interaction so as not to inadvertently offend anyone? Got it. |
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Damn, y’all love to fight about everything. I live in the south and love it when the waitress asks “what you having’ darlin?”
Reminds me of Flo on Mel’s Diner. |
You are not relating or appreciating anyone by calling them sweetie, sweetie? See how that sounds? You sound like a condescending, uneducated hick. You're welcome. |
I find these responses bizarre. I have ever used a term of endearment for a stranger in my life and yet have no issue communicating at all. The idea if that if you can't use a term of endearment, you wuoldn't be able to speak without offending people is a you problem. You should get some therapy to learn basic social skills and communication. The options aren't Be Offensive or Don't Speak. |
"Hey you, you dropped this." |
Nope. But thanks for proving my point. |
I'm the PP and I'm not stupid, but now I'm getting why you are having a hard time with this. You can't use an ounce of empathy to understand that MANY people who say this stuff do not consider it offensive, it's what they call everyone, and they were raised to speak this way? A waitress calling you hon or sweetie is not out to get you. That's just how she talks. If you are so much better and more sophisticated than she is, then surely you can have the good manners and patience to let it go, rather than call her stupid, which is inarguably ruder than calling someone "sweetie." |
| Only women, usually older than me, do it and I'm in my 40s. I see it as just how they speak and a nice thing. I've never had a man call me any of those. |