How common do you think swinging is?

[Anonymous]

It definitely happens but it’s not the norm, obviously. DH and I (very unexpectedly) hooked up with another couple for a bit in our forties and it was hot… but ultimately messy. I’m just glad we all remained friends. There are people in our town who are known to be swingers and they seem to be pretty unhappy people overall. I’ve noticed one pattern, which is a lot of them got married young and didn’t get to sow their wild oats.

For me, there is a contradiction I just can’t shake which is, I need to know someone at least a bit in order to be attracted to them. True swinger lifestyle is strictly sex with strangers, and that’s really not appealing to me. But neither is any kind of polyamory, because what I have learned is once feelings are involved it is messy, and a HUGE time suck. I mean, just think about how you feel when you first fall for someone, even just sexually—it’s all you can think about. I felt it took away time and energy needed for my kids, my marriage, my life. So I am not opposed to it in theory or for any moral reasons. It can be really hot and fun. I’m sure some people can juggle it all, but for the majority it causes more problems than it’s worth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I think it's fairly common where I live and some swingers are really fing annoying. When I'm out with my GF, they are very aggressive about approaching and it's nearly led to violent confrontations before. It's like they are all unicorn hunting.

Yes, it’s very hard to find a pretty woman for ENM, threesomes and swinging. I had a Silicone Valley mega figure aggressively court me for this stuff for over a year. I’m just a conventionally attractive late 40s woman with slim proportional body nothing sagging. He was f..,g in all kinds of forms and combinations and shared women with his business partners. I also was propositioned by a bi-sexual woman/international organization exec in DMV to join her and her BF. He didn’t have experience but she loved FFM threesomes and was bored with BF without inviting women to play.

It must be that you give off approachable vibes. I'm younger, slim, attrative, and have never been approached for this type of stuff. Men have hit on me, but they were at least subtle, and definitely never asked me to join a threesome. And I'm around plenty of people through work.

Maybe you are not as attractive as you imagine. Pretty women are approached to join committed couples as thirds rather often, usually by the wives as PP described. Happened twice to me without any prior sexual context (professional connections)

From my unscientific survey of couples looking for a threesome, it’s very often the woman wanting to add a woman for her to play with.

Our only threesome was me inviting a woman to join us while we were on vacation. I’m sure too much liquor was involved but we were all dancing and one thing led to another. It was my only experience with a woman.

[Anonymous]

Even if with a need (in my view) to spice things up with my wife of 18 years, I would be shocked if my wife would even entertain a threesome, swinging, etc.

[Anonymous]

Interestingly, most swingers I know are in their 40s and maybe early 50s. This is for the DMV region and it usually involved FFM.

[Anonymous]

Swinging in the DMV is more common than people perceive. Couples and singles from all walks of life participate, whether at house parties, clubs or organized events. We’ve met doctors, attorneys, nurses, high ranking military officers, enlisted military, police officers, paramedics, firefighters, company executives, SAHM’s, blue collar workers, and most unique of all a minister and his wife, who both preach and swing.

We dabbled with swinging while living in the DMV, it was fun and added a level of excitement not experienced before. We met people all ages, 30’s to their 70’s, some more enthusiastic about getting naked and interacting than others.

End of the day, we met some great friends that we enjoy to engage with socially. Not everyone you meet becomes a sexual partner. No regrets, and no we didn’t catch any diseases nor did we grow any new appendages. We gained new insights into ourselves, strengthened our relationship and enhanced our body image confidence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Swinging in the DMV is more common than people perceive. Couples and singles from all walks of life participate, whether at house parties, clubs or organized events. We’ve met doctors, attorneys, nurses, high ranking military officers, enlisted military, police officers, paramedics, firefighters, company executives, SAHM’s, blue collar workers, and most unique of all a minister and his wife, who both preach and swing.

We dabbled with swinging while living in the DMV, it was fun and added a level of excitement not experienced before. We met people all ages, 30’s to their 70’s, some more enthusiastic about getting naked and interacting than others.

End of the day, we met some great friends that we enjoy to engage with socially. Not everyone you meet becomes a sexual partner. No regrets, and no we didn’t catch any diseases nor did we grow any new appendages. We gained new insights into ourselves, strengthened our relationship and enhanced our body image confidence.

Wow swinging sounds classy! Have you ever been to a key party? Was swinging a way to try out new people or one of you watch the other with the other?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Swinging in the DMV is more common than people perceive. Couples and singles from all walks of life participate, whether at house parties, clubs or organized events. We’ve met doctors, attorneys, nurses, high ranking military officers, enlisted military, police officers, paramedics, firefighters, company executives, SAHM’s, blue collar workers, and most unique of all a minister and his wife, who both preach and swing.

We dabbled with swinging while living in the DMV, it was fun and added a level of excitement not experienced before. We met people all ages, 30’s to their 70’s, some more enthusiastic about getting naked and interacting than others.

End of the day, we met some great friends that we enjoy to engage with socially. Not everyone you meet becomes a sexual partner. No regrets, and no we didn’t catch any diseases nor did we grow any new appendages. We gained new insights into ourselves, strengthened our relationship and enhanced our body image confidence.

Wow swinging sounds classy! Have you ever been to a key party? Was swinging a way to try out new people or one of you watch the other with the other?

Sorry key parties predated us by a few decades. Key parties were popular in the 70’s and early 80’s.
We preferred parallel play, and soft swap. On occasion we did engage with other couples for full swap play, in an orgy style of play. Using condoms for penetration, of course.

[Anonymous]

I always wanted to swing, but was more interested in giving my girl mfm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's fairly common where I live and some swingers are really fing annoying. When I'm out with my GF, they are very aggressive about approaching and it's nearly led to violent confrontations before. It's like they are all unicorn hunting.

Yes, it’s very hard to find a pretty woman for ENM, threesomes and swinging. I had a Silicone Valley mega figure aggressively court me for this stuff for over a year. I’m just a conventionally attractive late 40s woman with slim proportional body nothing sagging. He was f..,g in all kinds of forms and combinations and shared women with his business partners. I also was propositioned by a bi-sexual woman/international organization exec in DMV to join her and her BF. He didn’t have experience but she loved FFM threesomes and was bored with BF without inviting women to play.

It must be that you give off approachable vibes. I'm younger, slim, attrative, and have never been approached for this type of stuff. Men have hit on me, but they were at least subtle, and definitely never asked me to join a threesome. And I'm around plenty of people through work.

Maybe you are not as attractive as you imagine. Pretty women are approached to join committed couples as thirds rather often, usually by the wives as PP described. Happened twice to me without any prior sexual context (professional connections)

From my unscientific survey of couples looking for a threesome, it’s very often the woman wanting to add a woman for her to play with.

Of course and they want an attractive woman to play with. Nobody is interested in old boys

Bingo. Women under 30 are the hot spot. 18-30ish for a threesome. Single and still haven't hit the wall.

No, my husband and I used to incorporate single women into our play, and anyone under 21 was waaaaay too young. I think 23 was the youngest we played with. But we were only around 30 at the time. These days we probably wouldn’t go under 30.

[Anonymous]

A friend tried it to help save her marriage (spoiler alert…it didn’t). But she said she recognized MULTIPLE people from her community on the site.

[Anonymous]

Is this mostly a rich people thing?

[Anonymous]

Today I was out at my local bar and the group sitting next to us is apparently a polycule. Two couples, they sleep together, and there were a couple of other girlfriends in the mix. Not my thing, but they seemed like fun people.

[Anonymous]

Common. And the people doing it are surprisingly normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It definitely happens but it’s not the norm, obviously. DH and I (very unexpectedly) hooked up with another couple for a bit in our forties and it was hot… but ultimately messy. I’m just glad we all remained friends. There are people in our town who are known to be swingers and they seem to be pretty unhappy people overall. I’ve noticed one pattern, which is a lot of them got married young and didn’t get to sow their wild oats.

For me, there is a contradiction I just can’t shake which is, I need to know someone at least a bit in order to be attracted to them. True swinger lifestyle is strictly sex with strangers, and that’s really not appealing to me. But neither is any kind of polyamory, because what I have learned is once feelings are involved it is messy, and a HUGE time suck. I mean, just think about how you feel when you first fall for someone, even just sexually—it’s all you can think about. I felt it took away time and energy needed for my kids, my marriage, my life. So I am not opposed to it in theory or for any moral reasons. It can be really hot and fun. I’m sure some people can juggle it all, but for the majority it causes more problems than it’s worth.

Actually, the ones I’ve met seem to be pretty happy people. Often confident in their relationships and generally easy-going.