Grandparents don’t want to buy car seats for kid visiting

[Anonymous]

We flew with our car seats as long as we needed them. Neither of our parents ever had car seats and it was never an issue. Both did have a crib or pack and play at their house. I think that was basically it and we brought the rest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is odd. Are you sure when they told you to make a list, they meant items like that? I would never expect them to buy those.

Seriously! They were probably thinking certain brands of cereal, maybe a pack of diapers and wipes, OP. Not freaking car seats. You are way off base!

I agree. Pretty cheeky.

[Anonymous]

OP, you buy. You have the car seat delivered to them.

[Anonymous]

It was out of line to expect them to pay up for car seats.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My parents, who live in Europe, and all the American, Asian and European grandparents I know, were very diligent about car seats: they bought the appropriate ones for their cars without a second thought. And these are people in their 70s and 80s! My kids are 19 and 14 now.

You should excoriate yours until they comply, seriously. This is a priority and not something you let slide. If they are so destitute that they cannot buy something so important, they should have let you know *in advance* so you arrive with the right stuff, or order one to be delivered to their address that they could install.

Shame on them.

Until they comply? You’re out of your mind. The only person responsible for car seats is the parent. You are not obligated to having someone else COMPLY with your demand for a purchase of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't bring carseats? You flew somewhere without knowing there would be carseats on arrival?

One parent stays at the airport with the kids, and the other parent goes to Walmart and comes back. This is a parent responsibility.

They asked us for a list of things we needed. They bought everything but the car seats (probably because they were the most expensive and they deemed it not necessary. They kept telling us we never used car seats growing up. Lord)

I would never expect my parents to spend $300+ of their own money on carseats. I have always either brought them myself or had them shipped to my parents house.

When my parents ask what we need while visiting, they mean "what food and beverages do you need?" not "what expensive items that we will use twice a year only when you visit?" We brought carseats with us when our kids were really little and then later brought a booster seat and left it there because we knew we'd use it over the course of several years.

Clearly, your family norms are different than OPs (and mine). My parents would buy all things expensive for their grandkids, including the ridiculously expensive air Jordan's my daughter wanted for Christmas last year. It doesn't mean their safety standards meet mine.

Not the same. This isn’t a gift, and the kids already have car seats at home (that could have been brought).

[Anonymous]

Had you given them the model and type of car seat and they just ignored it? That would really bother me. But to just say "get us car seats" with no further conversation seems presumptuous. How would they have even known what kind to get without further discussion with you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I live right down the street from my parents. My kids ride in their car at least once a week. I’ve bought them 4 car seats at least… and they won’t use them. They whine and will try to use the booster seat for my 2 year old. We fight and they end up taking my car instead, which is annoying to say the least.

I seriously don’t get grandparents and car seat safety. It boggles my mind. My parents are highly educated too.

So you KNOWINGLY allow your kids to ride dangerously 50+ times per year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My parents, who live in Europe, and all the American, Asian and European grandparents I know, were very diligent about car seats: they bought the appropriate ones for their cars without a second thought. And these are people in their 70s and 80s! My kids are 19 and 14 now.

You should excoriate yours until they comply, seriously. This is a priority and not something you let slide. If they are so destitute that they cannot buy something so important, they should have let you know *in advance* so you arrive with the right stuff, or order one to be delivered to their address that they could install.

Shame on them.

Car seats are on the parents to procure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I live right down the street from my parents. My kids ride in their car at least once a week. I’ve bought them 4 car seats at least… and they won’t use them. They whine and will try to use the booster seat for my 2 year old. We fight and they end up taking my car instead, which is annoying to say the least.

I seriously don’t get grandparents and car seat safety. It boggles my mind. My parents are highly educated too.

So you KNOWINGLY allow your kids to ride dangerously 50+ times per year?

No. They take OPs car that has seats. Read a little more closely.

[Anonymous]

Car seats are up to parents to provide. It's on you.

[Anonymous]

Car seats are free to check. Bring yours with you. How is this a question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I live right down the street from my parents. My kids ride in their car at least once a week. I’ve bought them 4 car seats at least… and they won’t use them. They whine and will try to use the booster seat for my 2 year old. We fight and they end up taking my car instead, which is annoying to say the least.

I seriously don’t get grandparents and car seat safety. It boggles my mind. My parents are highly educated too.

So you KNOWINGLY allow your kids to ride dangerously 50+ times per year?

No. They take OPs car that has seats. Read a little more closely.

The comment was incoherent.

[Anonymous]

OP, I hope you show your parents some grace for their mistake, after seeing all the posters here who helpfully illustrated how unrepentently aggressively stupid the average person is.

[Anonymous]

It's a little weird (sorry millennial talking!) that you said "we need a car seat" and then didn't follow up regarding whether it was procured. It could be as simple as they felt embarrassed by not knowing how to get the right one, and hoped you'd bring your own after the lack of follow-up, and made up an excuse.