Grandparents don’t want to buy car seats for kid visiting

[Anonymous]

Have you ever visited them before? How old are your kids? They basically bought everything you could possibly need so I don’t think it’s unreasonable for car seats to be on you. I find it weird that was never discussed and that you have multiple kids and have never been to their house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't bring carseats? You flew somewhere without knowing there would be carseats on arrival?

One parent stays at the airport with the kids, and the other parent goes to Walmart and comes back. This is a parent responsibility.

They asked us for a list of things we needed. They bought everything but the car seats (probably because they were the most expensive and they deemed it not necessary. They kept telling us we never used car seats growing up. Lord)

I would never expect my parents to spend $300+ of their own money on carseats. I have always either brought them myself or had them shipped to my parents house.

When my parents ask what we need while visiting, they mean "what food and beverages do you need?" not "what expensive items that we will use twice a year only when you visit?" We brought carseats with us when our kids were really little and then later brought a booster seat and left it there because we knew we'd use it over the course of several years.

Clearly, your family norms are different than OPs (and mine). My parents would buy all things expensive for their grandkids, including the ridiculously expensive air Jordan's my daughter wanted for Christmas last year. It doesn't mean their safety standards meet mine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you sound like an entitled brat.

DP
I don't agree. It depends on what is normal in her family. You are projecting your family norms to a different family, which is totally weird and lacks the most basic empathy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They think it’s a waste of money as it’s a small town and it’s safe to drive around everywhere. I would be happy to pay for it myself, had they not sprung this on us when we landed at the airport after they’d asked us what we needed for the trip before, and we said car seats. Wtf

How old are your kids, and why weren't they in seats on the airplane?

NP. Airplane seat belts sit low across the hips for everyone, including kids. The point of a booster seat for bigger kids is so the regular seatbelt will fit across the chest like it does for an adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is bananas. OP sounds crazy and the grandparents sound crazier. This is really not rocket science.

My parents were born before the Great Depression and even they always used car seats with the grandkids. I totally don’t get these old people that don’t believe in modern safety knventions. The next time they say something like that, point out that their parents lived without MRIs and knee replacement or glucose monitors or EKGs or statins so maybe they should give up all that stuff as welll (plus their iPhone and kindle).

So your parents are about 100 years old, therefore you are 70-80, your kids are in their 40s and your grandchildren are older elementary?

You forget in the 80s they didn't make carseats for kids over 2, yet your parents had carseats for all the kids. I think you might want to get checked for dementia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't bring carseats? You flew somewhere without knowing there would be carseats on arrival?

One parent stays at the airport with the kids, and the other parent goes to Walmart and comes back. This is a parent responsibility.

They asked us for a list of things we needed. They bought everything but the car seats (probably because they were the most expensive and they deemed it not necessary. They kept telling us we never used car seats growing up. Lord)

I would never expect my parents to spend $300+ of their own money on carseats. I have always either brought them myself or had them shipped to my parents house.

When my parents ask what we need while visiting, they mean "what food and beverages do you need?" not "what expensive items that we will use twice a year only when you visit?" We brought carseats with us when our kids were really little and then later brought a booster seat and left it there because we knew we'd use it over the course of several years.

Clearly, your family norms are different than OPs (and mine). My parents would buy all things expensive for their grandkids, including the ridiculously expensive air Jordan's my daughter wanted for Christmas last year. It doesn't mean their safety standards meet mine.

Whether it is due to not wanting to spend tons of money or not wanting to meet safety standards, it doesn’t matter: buy a car seat for your own kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't bring carseats? You flew somewhere without knowing there would be carseats on arrival?

One parent stays at the airport with the kids, and the other parent goes to Walmart and comes back. This is a parent responsibility.

They asked us for a list of things we needed. They bought everything but the car seats (probably because they were the most expensive and they deemed it not necessary. They kept telling us we never used car seats growing up. Lord)

I would never expect my parents to spend $300+ of their own money on carseats. I have always either brought them myself or had them shipped to my parents house.

When my parents ask what we need while visiting, they mean "what food and beverages do you need?" not "what expensive items that we will use twice a year only when you visit?" We brought carseats with us when our kids were really little and then later brought a booster seat and left it there because we knew we'd use it over the course of several years.

Clearly, your family norms are different than OPs (and mine). My parents would buy all things expensive for their grandkids, including the ridiculously expensive air Jordan's my daughter wanted for Christmas last year. It doesn't mean their safety standards meet mine.

Whether it is due to not wanting to spend tons of money or not wanting to meet safety standards, it doesn’t matter: buy a car seat for your own kids.

I agree. And if the grandparents ask what they should get to prepare and they discussed car seats as part of this, it is a reasonable expectation that they would have car seats. It doesn't make OP entitled. I would be frustrated too. It's the same if you call a restaurant in advance to warn them of a debilitating peanut allergy and they assured you they can accommodate you. When you turn up you learn all their food is cooked in peanut oil. It doesn't mean that person is entitled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They think it’s a waste of money as it’s a small town and it’s safe to drive around everywhere. I would be happy to pay for it myself, had they not sprung this on us when we landed at the airport after they’d asked us what we needed for the trip before, and we said car seats. Wtf

How old are your kids, and why weren't they in seats on the airplane?

Kids between 2 and 10 will not have car seats on the plane, but will in a car.

We absolutely did have our kid in a carseat on the plane until 4.

BS. Or you never flew

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you ever visited them before? How old are your kids? They basically bought everything you could possibly need so I don’t think it’s unreasonable for car seats to be on you. I find it weird that was never discussed and that you have multiple kids and have never been to their house

This. Is this your first visit there? Something’s fishy here.

[Anonymous]

You and your spouse need to provide car seats.

Probably a rental car and hotel for the duration of the visit as well..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you ever visited them before? How old are your kids? They basically bought everything you could possibly need so I don’t think it’s unreasonable for car seats to be on you. I find it weird that was never discussed and that you have multiple kids and have never been to their house

This. Is this your first visit there? Something’s fishy here.

If OP has infant twins, then yes, she could have multiple kids and it could be her first visit since having them. We flew our twins to visit my parents for the first time when they were 5 months old, so we brought two infant seats with us.

[Anonymous]

People here are nuts.
OP if they asked and indicated they would be prepared with car seats, then they should have had car seats or let you know. Whether your family does that or not doesn't matter. My parents would have borrowed one in my hometown. I will buy whatever I need to make it easier for my kids to travel with their kids to visit me.
Second, it's far cheaper to buy a carseat from Walmart than all these people suggesting a rental carseat. Those are like $20/day and complete crap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't bring carseats? You flew somewhere without knowing there would be carseats on arrival?

One parent stays at the airport with the kids, and the other parent goes to Walmart and comes back. This is a parent responsibility.

They asked us for a list of things we needed. They bought everything but the car seats (probably because they were the most expensive and they deemed it not necessary. They kept telling us we never used car seats growing up. Lord)

I would never expect my parents to spend $300+ of their own money on carseats. I have always either brought them myself or had them shipped to my parents house.

When my parents ask what we need while visiting, they mean "what food and beverages do you need?" not "what expensive items that we will use twice a year only when you visit?" We brought carseats with us when our kids were really little and then later brought a booster seat and left it there because we knew we'd use it over the course of several years.

Clearly, your family norms are different than OPs (and mine). My parents would buy all things expensive for their grandkids, including the ridiculously expensive air Jordan's my daughter wanted for Christmas last year. It doesn't mean their safety standards meet mine.

Whether it is due to not wanting to spend tons of money or not wanting to meet safety standards, it doesn’t matter: buy a car seat for your own kids.

I agree. And if the grandparents ask what they should get to prepare and they discussed car seats as part of this, it is a reasonable expectation that they would have car seats. It doesn't make OP entitled. I would be frustrated too. It's the same if you call a restaurant in advance to warn them of a debilitating peanut allergy and they assured you they can accommodate you. When you turn up you learn all their food is cooked in peanut oil. It doesn't mean that person is entitled.

It’s actually not the same, because op or their spouse didn’t call in advance to confirm the car seats were purchased and installed. This was the mistake. It’s on the parents to make sure the car seats are ready to go, whether they are the ones who bought them or not. And I wonder if this post is even real, because most people wouldn’t expect a grandparent to be able to install the seats correctly, so there would be multiple conversations in advance of the trip about these logistics. No one would expect to just show up and have this all go smoothly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't bring carseats? You flew somewhere without knowing there would be carseats on arrival?

One parent stays at the airport with the kids, and the other parent goes to Walmart and comes back. This is a parent responsibility.

I’m smarter than you: go to the rental car places at the airport and rent car seats.

Yuck. It’s cheaper (and more convenient) to buy them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't bring carseats? You flew somewhere without knowing there would be carseats on arrival?

One parent stays at the airport with the kids, and the other parent goes to Walmart and comes back. This is a parent responsibility.

I’m smarter than you: go to the rental car places at the airport and rent car seats.

Yuck. It’s cheaper (and more convenient) to buy them.

Renting a car seat is worse financially for any time period more than 4 or 5 days; plus they are usually dirty, may not have the correct buckle/seat type, and you don’t know how old they are or how they’ve been handled in the past. So this “smarter” tip is to be taken with a grain of salt.