Favoritism

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The context of any apparent favoritism is key. Many, many times the "favoritism" is just delusional parents who don't see that their kid is average to below average. They don't see that the kid playing over their kid works harder, is more coachable, and has a better attitude (but they don't score so they suck hahaha).

If there are inappropriate relationships and dynamics with the coach, then report it. If you just think your kid should play more than the other, then you better be damn sure that your kid brings more to the team before you open your mouth. If not, you will be on the club list as one of those parents.

+1
Parents who talked to the coach a lot, delusional parents whose kids scored the goal because of being a ball hog, Kids who were uncoachable because of every mistake they made their parents on the sideline will say a good job! So that kid will never learn or try to improve anything.

Agree on all except the ball hog. Depends on the age, and depends on the team.

A good player on a crap team always looks like a ball hog. And at certain age groups, that team can look really good because of that 1 ball hog.

Said the ball hog’s parents!

Said the equipment manager’s parents

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There seems to be a lot of keyboard avengers on this thread.

1. The coach is not communicating with my kid via text 1on1

2. Although I know that he's communicating with 2 players via text I don't know if parernts are or aren't included on the communications.

I feel that the communication is inappropriate and that it's creating favoritism for certain players. But without knowing with 100% certainty that it's 1on1 coach to player communication this is not something that can be escalated to SafeSport.

If we're able to leave the team and play somewhere else I have considered creating a SafeSport case just to make the guy think twice about texting with children even if parents are included.

You don’t need to know. Safe sport will investigate and if it’s kosher so be it, but if anything wrong is happening, they’ll deal help deal with it. If there is smoke, you pull a smoke alarm, you don’t just say “well, I’d pull the alarm if I knew for sure there was a fire…but I don’t know for sure, so I’ll just mind my own business.”

Your thought process is reasonable but coaches and clubs are vindictive. I need to see the fire before pulling the smoke alarm.

If we leave the team/club I might file an anonymous report. Just being investigated would likely scare the coach and leadership straight and stop all text communications across the board.

Can't you report anonymously? You don't have to say you're the one that pulled the fire alarm unless you are looking for glory.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our coach chose a team captain.

The captain never scores and walks when forced to play defense.

The captain texts with the our coach.

Our coach won't respond to other players or other parents texts.

Everyone is pissed and looking for ways to get out.

Does captain have to score?

Be the team manager, that's how you win playing time for your child. If your coach has private lessons, sign your child up. This is very true with SYC.

this is the way…..

I must be doing something wrong as a team manager. Been manager for my son's team several times at different age group. Never got him any extra favors, seems like the opposite in that doesn't get picked for captain, selected for events or anything. Coaches would go out of the way to make sure it doesn't look like my son receives any favors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our coach chose a team captain.

The captain never scores and walks when forced to play defense.

The captain texts with the our coach.

Our coach won't respond to other players or other parents texts.

Everyone is pissed and looking for ways to get out.

Does captain have to score?

Be the team manager, that's how you win playing time for your child. If your coach has private lessons, sign your child up. This is very true with SYC.

this is the way…..

I must be doing something wrong as a team manager. Been manager for my son's team several times at different age group. Never got him any extra favors, seems like the opposite in that doesn't get picked for captain, selected for events or anything. Coaches would go out of the way to make sure it doesn't look like my son receives any favors.

Wow, you are a unicorn then. Our team manger got their son team captain and a position switch this year.

[Anonymous]

Lost in this thread is that OP wants to report a coach with no knowledge of whether or not the coach is violating the rules and no suspicion that there’s any wrongdoing simply because she thinks Larlo isn’t getting as much playing time as she would like.

What a lunatic.

More likely than not, Larlo really isn’t that good and the coach is being reasonable and the parents are not being realistic about their kid’s ability - and treating him like he’s a 5 year old when everyone gets the exact same goody bag and not a young adult that’s going to need to learn how to overcome adversity anyway.

I feel for coaches in this era. Sheesh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lost in this thread is that OP wants to report a coach with no knowledge of whether or not the coach is violating the rules and no suspicion that there’s any wrongdoing simply because she thinks Larlo isn’t getting as much playing time as she would like.

What a lunatic.

More likely than not, Larlo really isn’t that good and the coach is being reasonable and the parents are not being realistic about their kid’s ability - and treating him like he’s a 5 year old when everyone gets the exact same goody bag and not a young adult that’s going to need to learn how to overcome adversity anyway.

I feel for coaches in this era. Sheesh.

OP seems to have a typical case of obsessive helicopter parent delusions. Weird flex and putdown response a few pages ago about their DC being on some top 50 team and not "the club down the street." Wake up call your kid just isn't good enough for TOP 10 and barely scraping by on TOP 50. With poor social skills and weird thinking like that, OP might need to get used to not getting their way.





My kid plays on a top 50 in the nation team and has been trying out for top 10 in the nation teams. It's a little different than trying for the club down the street.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There seems to be a lot of keyboard avengers on this thread.

1. The coach is not communicating with my kid via text 1on1

2. Although I know that he's communicating with 2 players via text I don't know if parernts are or aren't included on the communications.

I feel that the communication is inappropriate and that it's creating favoritism for certain players. But without knowing with 100% certainty that it's 1on1 coach to player communication this is not something that can be escalated to SafeSport.

If we're able to leave the team and play somewhere else I have considered creating a SafeSport case just to make the guy think twice about texting with children even if parents are included.

You don’t need to know. Safe sport will investigate and if it’s kosher so be it, but if anything wrong is happening, they’ll deal help deal with it. If there is smoke, you pull a smoke alarm, you don’t just say “well, I’d pull the alarm if I knew for sure there was a fire…but I don’t know for sure, so I’ll just mind my own business.”

Your thought process is reasonable but coaches and clubs are vindictive. I need to see the fire before pulling the smoke alarm.

If we leave the team/club I might file an anonymous report. Just being investigated would likely scare the coach and leadership straight and stop all text communications across the board.

Can't you report anonymously? You don't have to say you're the one that pulled the fire alarm unless you are looking for glory.

Precisely, report them. It will help your case and future cases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lost in this thread is that OP wants to report a coach with no knowledge of whether or not the coach is violating the rules and no suspicion that there’s any wrongdoing simply because she thinks Larlo isn’t getting as much playing time as she would like.

What a lunatic.

More likely than not, Larlo really isn’t that good and the coach is being reasonable and the parents are not being realistic about their kid’s ability - and treating him like he’s a 5 year old when everyone gets the exact same goody bag and not a young adult that’s going to need to learn how to overcome adversity anyway.

I feel for coaches in this era. Sheesh.

Thanks coach, you can leave the room now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lost in this thread is that OP wants to report a coach with no knowledge of whether or not the coach is violating the rules and no suspicion that there’s any wrongdoing simply because she thinks Larlo isn’t getting as much playing time as she would like.

What a lunatic.

More likely than not, Larlo really isn’t that good and the coach is being reasonable and the parents are not being realistic about their kid’s ability - and treating him like he’s a 5 year old when everyone gets the exact same goody bag and not a young adult that’s going to need to learn how to overcome adversity anyway.

I feel for coaches in this era. Sheesh.

Thanks coach, you can leave the room now.

No I’m just an ordinary person with a kid in classic because I don’t want to deal with travel.

Last year my DD didn’t play as much as I’d hoped but I said nothing and was friendly and supportive with the coach. This year new coach she plays way more. Maybe next year new coach again she plays less. I don’t know. It really doesn’t matter at all. Nobody is going pro here (and honestly given academic talent that would be a waste / distraction in the long run).

Soccer parents need a galactic chill pill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lost in this thread is that OP wants to report a coach with no knowledge of whether or not the coach is violating the rules and no suspicion that there’s any wrongdoing simply because she thinks Larlo isn’t getting as much playing time as she would like.

What a lunatic.

More likely than not, Larlo really isn’t that good and the coach is being reasonable and the parents are not being realistic about their kid’s ability - and treating him like he’s a 5 year old when everyone gets the exact same goody bag and not a young adult that’s going to need to learn how to overcome adversity anyway.

I feel for coaches in this era. Sheesh.

Thanks coach, you can leave the room now.

No I’m just an ordinary person with a kid in classic because I don’t want to deal with travel.

Last year my DD didn’t play as much as I’d hoped but I said nothing and was friendly and supportive with the coach. This year new coach she plays way more. Maybe next year new coach again she plays less. I don’t know. It really doesn’t matter at all. Nobody is going pro here (and honestly given academic talent that would be a waste / distraction in the long run).

Soccer parents need a galactic chill pill.

Classic coaching is MUCH different that coaching travel at the higher levels (ECNL and MLS Next, NA, etc.). So, your comment is out of context, since you have not experienced the nepotism that many of these clubs/coaches/directors made players go through.

Great that your kid is having a great time at classic, I am not judging that at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lost in this thread is that OP wants to report a coach with no knowledge of whether or not the coach is violating the rules and no suspicion that there’s any wrongdoing simply because she thinks Larlo isn’t getting as much playing time as she would like.

What a lunatic.

More likely than not, Larlo really isn’t that good and the coach is being reasonable and the parents are not being realistic about their kid’s ability - and treating him like he’s a 5 year old when everyone gets the exact same goody bag and not a young adult that’s going to need to learn how to overcome adversity anyway.

I feel for coaches in this era. Sheesh.

Teachers don't text students

Coaches shouldn't be texting players

I looked on the Safesport site and coaches texting 1on1 with players is a major red flag and something they look for when investigating coaches and clubs..

The coach that is trying to defend other coaches actions needs to get with the times.

Also the OP you're trying to acuse of not getting minutes clearly said that was was not an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lost in this thread is that OP wants to report a coach with no knowledge of whether or not the coach is violating the rules and no suspicion that there’s any wrongdoing simply because she thinks Larlo isn’t getting as much playing time as she would like.

What a lunatic.

More likely than not, Larlo really isn’t that good and the coach is being reasonable and the parents are not being realistic about their kid’s ability - and treating him like he’s a 5 year old when everyone gets the exact same goody bag and not a young adult that’s going to need to learn how to overcome adversity anyway.

I feel for coaches in this era. Sheesh.

Teachers don't text students

Coaches shouldn't be texting players

I looked on the Safesport site and coaches texting 1on1 with players is a major red flag and something they look for when investigating coaches and clubs..

The coach that is trying to defend other coaches actions needs to get with the times.

Also the OP you're trying to acuse of not getting minutes clearly said that was was not an issue.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our coach chose a team captain.

The captain never scores and walks when forced to play defense.

The captain texts with the our coach.

Our coach won't respond to other players or other parents texts.

Everyone is pissed and looking for ways to get out.

Does captain have to score?

Be the team manager, that's how you win playing time for your child. If your coach has private lessons, sign your child up. This is very true with SYC.

this is the way…..

I must be doing something wrong as a team manager. Been manager for my son's team several times at different age group. Never got him any extra favors, seems like the opposite in that doesn't get picked for captain, selected for events or anything. Coaches would go out of the way to make sure it doesn't look like my son receives any favors.

Wow, you are a unicorn then. Our team manger got their son team captain and a position switch this year.

Maybe they deserved it. Our team managers son is captain but he's the best leader and a great kid. I don't see any special treatment that is undeserved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s called life, deal with it. Every team has players playing who should be on the bench.

And a word for the person wanting to tryout for Alexandria . . . Don’t

Yes, please don't. You will regret it for sure. There are much better options around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our coach chose a team captain.

The captain never scores and walks when forced to play defense.

The captain texts with the our coach.

Our coach won't respond to other players or other parents texts.

Everyone is pissed and looking for ways to get out.

Does captain have to score?

Be the team manager, that's how you win playing time for your child. If your coach has private lessons, sign your child up. This is very true with SYC.

this is the way…..

I must be doing something wrong as a team manager. Been manager for my son's team several times at different age group. Never got him any extra favors, seems like the opposite in that doesn't get picked for captain, selected for events or anything. Coaches would go out of the way to make sure it doesn't look like my son receives any favors.

Wow, you are a unicorn then. Our team manger got their son team captain and a position switch this year.

Maybe they deserved it. Our team managers son is captain but he's the best leader and a great kid. I don't see any special treatment that is undeserved.

Our coach does the favoritism game left and right. For whatever reason our team managers kid just isn't on his list. But, when you see her play she's solid. It's hard to watch when other players are walking.

One thing I've noticed is that it doesn't matter the level. When there's a lot of politics and favoritism happening on a team they're generally not playing very well as a team.