Why are women so crazy with expectations these days while dating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's telling you because you've been friendzoned

nah.. it's her way of dumping him by turning him off.

[Anonymous]

Is she too much or are you not enough?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just went on a date over the past weekend. She's a nurse, which is completely fine. But during the date she reveals she wants to go move to an area like Chevy Chase/Potomac and wants to join a country club in the Potomac. I'm like WTF in my brain. Her expectations are so massively out of whack for her current situation and the reality of her life. Even in the extreme scenario of a 0.0001% chance I would ever marry a person like this, how does she think we would ever afford a multiple million dollar house and an exclusive country club membership costing several hundred thousands of dollars per year on a salary like hers (and ours)? I mean what does she expect or thinks she deserves? To date CEOs or hedge fund managers only while she is just a nurse? Absolutely unreal.

I'm not poor, have a PhD in engineering and started a small startup, but that's not going to pay a mortgage or country club membership. The insane entitlement mentality of many women I've dated these days is just nuts. Has the Real Housewives of the Potomac brainwashed an entire generation of women in this area for what to expect in life?

Your insecurity is showing,

This is nothing to do with her gender.

There are men who think just like her (drowning in debt or looking for get rich quick schemes)..

I think you have negative attitudes towards women that you may not realize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think dating has changed for men and what they have to do to be successful has evolved. In my mind the perfect storm of things have overlapped creating the current dating market:

1. Women don’t need man any more. They’re often higher educated, invest more in themselves and have higher aspirations than the average male.

2. The obesity epidemic has greatly impacted the number of people that both sexes are actually, physically attracted to and want to date.

3. Women have always been the gate keepers for sex and online dating has created a “kid in a candy store” effect where they can literally order a hot guy like a pizza and have him show up at her door within 30 minutes. Much like pizza - its not always good, but there’s no need to sleep with an average schlub that they’re not attracted to. Not feeling like Italian tonight? Maybe they’ll try a different experience. Lol.

As a guy, I’ve thought about what I would do to approach today’s dating market if I were single. A couple ideas come to mind:

1. I’d invest in myself in the same way a lot of women do - lotsa time in the gym, improve my interpersonal skills, travel, work on my career and self growth etc. Basically, I’d have something to offer.

2. I wouldn’t participate in online dating. I’d talk to people and socialize wherever I went and meet someone face to face.

I think men are the ones who think of dating like trying different pizza toppings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like it's weird to hear someone on the first date mention a pie in the sky dream they have and then assume she is asking you to bankroll her dream. If she is dating you then obviously she doesn't really expect that.

This. She probably says stuff like this on dates to filter out the duds and brokies. Mission accomplished.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like it's weird to hear someone on the first date mention a pie in the sky dream they have and then assume she is asking you to bankroll her dream. If she is dating you then obviously she doesn't really expect that.

This. She probably says stuff like this on dates to filter out the duds and brokies. Mission accomplished.

I'm the dream profile for a woman like this, and I would be turned off. Mission accomplished.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just here and wondering why people on this thread, esp OP, seem to want to denigrate nursing as a career? Weird.

The nurses I know have lots of options and are paid really well.

bc these people make 5x as much as nurses, so its not a "career" worth consideration to them. Same for countless other careers that make you poor in DC.

[Anonymous]

Phd screams avoiding the real world. For 5-7 years of the “program” plus whatever slow paced, academic “jobs” require one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Phd screams avoiding the real world. For 5-7 years of the “program” plus whatever slow paced, academic “jobs” require one.

Life is great post-tenure. Have fun slaving away with no job security

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Phd screams avoiding the real world. For 5-7 years of the “program” plus whatever slow paced, academic “jobs” require one.

Life is great post-tenure. Have fun slaving away with no job security

It's called retirement.
Half the years at twice the pay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like it's weird to hear someone on the first date mention a pie in the sky dream they have and then assume she is asking you to bankroll her dream. If she is dating you then obviously she doesn't really expect that.

This. She probably says stuff like this on dates to filter out the duds and brokies. Mission accomplished.

I had a friend who wanted a similar lifestyle but in a different state. She has been saying this since we were kids. She wanted to live in a certain neighborhood, send her kids to a specific private school and be members of the country club. She also was not ambitious and wanted to be a SAHM. She would have been amazing wife to the right guy. She is twice divorced and never got what she wanted.

Just because someone says they want something doesn’t mean they will ever get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Phd screams avoiding the real world. For 5-7 years of the “program” plus whatever slow paced, academic “jobs” require one.

Life is great post-tenure. Have fun slaving away with no job security

The wealth I generate each year plus investment returns is my “security”. Plus my promotions

Meanwhile I had a great life in my 20a, and beyond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think dating has changed for men and what they have to do to be successful has evolved. In my mind the perfect storm of things have overlapped creating the current dating market:

1. Women don’t need man any more. They’re often higher educated, invest more in themselves and have higher aspirations than the average male.

2. The obesity epidemic has greatly impacted the number of people that both sexes are actually, physically attracted to and want to date.

3. Women have always been the gate keepers for sex and online dating has created a “kid in a candy store” effect where they can literally order a hot guy like a pizza and have him show up at her door within 30 minutes. Much like pizza - its not always good, but there’s no need to sleep with an average schlub that they’re not attracted to. Not feeling like Italian tonight? Maybe they’ll try a different experience. Lol.

As a guy, I’ve thought about what I would do to approach today’s dating market if I were single. A couple ideas come to mind:

1. I’d invest in myself in the same way a lot of women do - lotsa time in the gym, improve my interpersonal skills, travel, work on my career and self growth etc. Basically, I’d have something to offer.

2. I wouldn’t participate in online dating. I’d talk to people and socialize wherever I went and meet someone face to face.

I think men are the ones who think of dating like trying different pizza toppings.

Isn't in fun when men come here to tell us how we think?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just went on a date over the past weekend. She's a nurse, which is completely fine. But during the date she reveals she wants to go move to an area like Chevy Chase/Potomac and wants to join a country club in the Potomac. I'm like WTF in my brain. Her expectations are so massively out of whack for her current situation and the reality of her life. Even in the extreme scenario of a 0.0001% chance I would ever marry a person like this, how does she think we would ever afford a multiple million dollar house and an exclusive country club membership costing several hundred thousands of dollars per year on a salary like hers (and ours)? I mean what does she expect or thinks she deserves? To date CEOs or hedge fund managers only while she is just a nurse? Absolutely unreal.

I'm not poor, have a PhD in engineering and started a small startup, but that's not going to pay a mortgage or country club membership. The insane entitlement mentality of many women I've dated these days is just nuts. Has the Real Housewives of the Potomac brainwashed an entire generation of women in this area for what to expect in life?

I've come late to this thread, but I think you misunderstand the variety of people living in Bethesda, Chevy Chase or Potomac, and belonging to country clubs. Some of them don't have that much money. I know, I'm one of them. So maybe get out more and stretch your mind on what's possible in your future, Engineer OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Social media encourages women to have high demands.

If you think she's too much, say "no, thanks" and move on.

Exactly this.