Tell me your best jokes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There once was a zoo. It was a terrible zoo. It was so awful, it only had one animal. It was a shitzu. (Sh** zoo…)

No it goes like this:

Went to the zoo the other day.

It only had one dog in it.

It was a shih tzu.

[Anonymous]

How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One.

[Anonymous]

What do you call a cod in a tuxedo?


Sofishticated.

[Anonymous]

Q. Did you hear that bald eagles have been taken off the endangered list?

A. It seems that they have been undercounted for years. It turns out many were folding their feathers over the top of their heads.

[Anonymous]

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Aye matey!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Aye matey!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any and all jokes. Please post them here. The cheesier the better.

Superman is performing aerial stunts in New York City and as he goes by the Empire State Bldg. He sees Wonder Woman sun bathing au naturel
"Umm, I've always fancied her. This could be my lucky day," he thinks to himself. He jumps over a couple of buildings in a single bound and finds himself on the sun deck with Wonder Woman. In true Superman fashion, he is faster than a speeding bullet and then swooshes off. Wonder Woman sits up and turns to the Invisible Man and says, "What was that all about"? "I don't know," said the Invisible Man, "but it hurt like Hell!"

I think I get it, but I want to make sure.

So, WW was getting it on with IM. Superman did the deed with the IM in error, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?

Pilgrims.

Cute!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any and all jokes. Please post them here. The cheesier the better.

Superman is performing aerial stunts in New York City and as he goes by the Empire State Bldg. He sees Wonder Woman sun bathing au naturel
"Umm, I've always fancied her. This could be my lucky day," he thinks to himself. He jumps over a couple of buildings in a single bound and finds himself on the sun deck with Wonder Woman. In true Superman fashion, he is faster than a speeding bullet and then swooshes off. Wonder Woman sits up and turns to the Invisible Man and says, "What was that all about"? "I don't know," said the Invisible Man, "but it hurt like Hell!"

I think I get it, but I want to make sure.

So, WW was getting it on with IM. Superman did the deed with the IM in error, right?

You got it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Aye matey!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

That's not funny!

[Anonymous]

If a stork brings babies, what kind of bird brings no babies?

A little swallow

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?

You probably think it’s “R” but it be the “C”

O.k. I don't get it.

It be the sea.

Yeah, I don't get homophones either. I don't process language that way.

I was noticing the extra step required from hearing a joke told and reading a joke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any and all jokes. Please post them here. The cheesier the better.

Superman is performing aerial stunts in New York City and as he goes by the Empire State Bldg. He sees Wonder Woman sun bathing au naturel
"Umm, I've always fancied her. This could be my lucky day," he thinks to himself. He jumps over a couple of buildings in a single bound and finds himself on the sun deck with Wonder Woman. In true Superman fashion, he is faster than a speeding bullet and then swooshes off. Wonder Woman sits up and turns to the Invisible Man and says, "What was that all about"? "I don't know," said the Invisible Man, "but it hurt like Hell!"

I remember hearing this when I was young…. And totally not understanding. This is the first time I’ve heard it since and I’m, now I get it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any and all jokes. Please post them here. The cheesier the better.

Superman is performing aerial stunts in New York City and as he goes by the Empire State Bldg. He sees Wonder Woman sun bathing au naturel
"Umm, I've always fancied her. This could be my lucky day," he thinks to himself. He jumps over a couple of buildings in a single bound and finds himself on the sun deck with Wonder Woman. In true Superman fashion, he is faster than a speeding bullet and then swooshes off. Wonder Woman sits up and turns to the Invisible Man and says, "What was that all about"? "I don't know," said the Invisible Man, "but it hurt like Hell!"

I remember hearing this when I was young…. And totally not understanding. This is the first time I’ve heard it since and I’m, now I get it!

Lol