Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.
So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.
He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.
His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.
I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.
Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.
That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.
Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.
And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.
You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.
Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.
Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?
Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.
If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.
That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.
If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…
It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.
Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.
But, they aren't maturing like you are saying. Because, what you are comparing them to are kids a full year younger, not kids their own age or kids older. Yes, 6-12 months makes a big difference but kids will learn more from older kids as the example. If your 5 year old is with 4 year olds, they will seem more mature but they are being held to a 4 year old standard as a 5 year old. So, therefore, they are less mature than the 4 year old if they behave the same way and they are 5.
Thousands of kids who have been redshirted and are now successful adults prove you wrong. If this didn't work, nobody would do it. Unfortunately for you, these kids are doing well and turn out just fine. Find a new hobby.
You are deflecting and entirely missing the point. Some will be fine, some will struggle. However, these kids should be provided with supports given their special needs.
DP. That vast majority don’t have special needs so…
And let's be honest. Most supports are a joke and don't work anyway, if you can even get the school to provide them. If more time makes a huge difference, it's a no brainer.
Even if there is no concern about maturity more time in preschool can be a gift.
Agreed. Sometimes a delay is just a delay, with time kids catch up and no additional help or support is needed. Because kids don't all mature and develop at exactly the same rate. It's shocking people refuse to acknowledge basic facts.
And, did you have a professional decide that or you just held back for your own benefit? I cannot imagine a professional recommending holding back without other supports in place. Your kids aren't more mature when you hold them back. They still have delays. But, you are changing their peer group to a younger group so they appear older and smarter than those kids to you but its artificial given your kids are not with their true peers.
What do you consider a professional? Do the preschool teacher, future kindergarten teacher, and pediatrician count? Because that's what they recommended. I take their input over yours any day.
I would consider someone a psychologist or developmental ped. A preschool teacher or K. teacher is not qualified or trained in that area. Nor are a lot of ped.'s A preschool teacher at best has a generic 4 year degree in anything.
If they are recommending holding back without services and support they are way out of their league. They should recommend an evaluation.
You're so full of it. You don't get a say and your opinion is worthless.
A preschool teacher does not have the qualifications nor does a K. teacher. You are using them as a scapegoat. Nor does a 10 minute ped. appointment. If your child has to be held back, they have a delay, disorder or SN and need help. What are your qualifications to hold back a child and not understand that?
Lol and you’re qualified as an armchair internet troll on an anonymous forum? The bottom line of redshirting is that your kid is expected to be within a 12-16 month range of development. Research shows the disadvantage of being on the younger side of that spectrum. cry about it all you want, but parents who have the choice between their children being more at risk as the youngest are making the safe call by holding them to be older.
Reaseach like that is skewed to the results the reacher and reader want. It’s not healthy to have an 18 month age range in a classroom and it harms the kids held back as they are not maturing and getting the skills they need. Their birthday is essentially being reduced by a year so the expectations are changed for them.
If your kid needs to be held back you need to get them help. Preschool teachers are not qualified. They have no training at all. Our preschool missed huge red flags but thankfully I saw it and got my child help early.
If your kids are at risk you get them help. This is not about the kids but parents gaming the system so their less smart kids will get into the privates, magnets and sports.
You keep saying this, but it's not true. The vast majority of people who have redshirted would do it again. No harm was done. My DH was redshirted 40 years ago lived to tell the tale. What are your qualifications for your sweeping statements? I would trust people who know my child over an internet troll with no appropriate background or credentials who just likes talking out their ass.
My Aug DS was mature and smart enough so we did not hold back/redshirt. He is now a 9th grader and doing very well, excellent grades. I think he would have been bored/frustrated if we held him back.
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
I have a late August DD that we did not redshirt and that is now late elementary. She is doing fine socially and is crushing it academically. I don't look forward to having the boys a year older in her grade in HS, and honestly I have a hard time not silently scoffing when I hear their parents bragging about them.
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
I have a late August DD that we did not redshirt and that is now late elementary. She is doing fine socially and is crushing it academically. I don't look forward to having the boys a year older in her grade in HS, and honestly I have a hard time not silently scoffing when I hear their parents bragging about them.
Why are you so bitter that you can’t just be happy for these kids that are doing well? On top of it your daughter is also doing great… why not be happy for all these kids whose parents’ choices allowed them to succeed?
What is wrong with the world?
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
I have a late August DD that we did not redshirt and that is now late elementary. She is doing fine socially and is crushing it academically. I don't look forward to having the boys a year older in her grade in HS, and honestly I have a hard time not silently scoffing when I hear their parents bragging about them.
I’m sorry you are so far behind. Most parents have grown out of your sort of sad behavior by the time they have middle schoolers. It’s unfortunate you are still immature as a parent. You can grown out of that, you know, if you work at it.
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
So don’t go to private schools where they redshirt. Problem solved. Such ridiculous whining.
My DD was born on Aug 26th and we redshirted her. The oldest kids are born in July so maybe 13-14 months older than your DD… not 18. Stop with the drama (or change school/redshirt, etc.)
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
I have a late August DD that we did not redshirt and that is now late elementary. She is doing fine socially and is crushing it academically. I don't look forward to having the boys a year older in her grade in HS, and honestly I have a hard time not silently scoffing when I hear their parents bragging about them.
Why are you so bitter that you can’t just be happy for these kids that are doing well? On top of it your daughter is also doing great… why not be happy for all these kids whose parents’ choices allowed them to succeed?
What is wrong with the world?
+1
I know, my response to that poster was to feel so sorry for her. I honestly can’t imagine going through the world with that sort of zero-sum crazy competitive outlook. The other parents can probably tell she’s nuts and stay away. And I say this as someone who has one of the youngest kids in the class.
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
I have a late August DD that we did not redshirt and that is now late elementary. She is doing fine socially and is crushing it academically. I don't look forward to having the boys a year older in her grade in HS, and honestly I have a hard time not silently scoffing when I hear their parents bragging about them.
Why are you so bitter that you can’t just be happy for these kids that are doing well? On top of it your daughter is also doing great… why not be happy for all these kids whose parents’ choices allowed them to succeed?
What is wrong with the world?
It's annoying to have wrong-age kids in the class for a bunch of reasons. (see above in the thread) It's also hollow when a child's "success" is being good at soccer or "mature" when it's simply a function of being older.
What's wrong is not me. It's parents who can't stand to have a typical kid so they have to manage their environment to make them look good.
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
So don’t go to a private school where apparently they have an 18 month age range. Use your big girl skills and pick up the phone and call the admissions director and ask. Are you always so helpless? The lack of actual life skills from DCUM anti-redshirt parents is always astonishing.
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
I have a late August DD that we did not redshirt and that is now late elementary. She is doing fine socially and is crushing it academically. I don't look forward to having the boys a year older in her grade in HS, and honestly I have a hard time not silently scoffing when I hear their parents bragging about them.
Why are you so bitter that you can’t just be happy for these kids that are doing well? On top of it your daughter is also doing great… why not be happy for all these kids whose parents’ choices allowed them to succeed?
What is wrong with the world?
It's annoying to have wrong-age kids in the class for a bunch of reasons. (see above in the thread) It's also hollow when a child's "success" is being good at soccer or "mature" when it's simply a function of being older.
What's wrong is not me. It's parents who can't stand to have a typical kid so they have to manage their environment to make them look good.
You are such a sad, sad person. I cannot imagine going through life like you. (I didn’t redshirt.)
Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I have an august 31 DD that i will not be red shirting. She will end up in 9th grade with kids a full 18 months older.
I have a late August DD that we did not redshirt and that is now late elementary. She is doing fine socially and is crushing it academically. I don't look forward to having the boys a year older in her grade in HS, and honestly I have a hard time not silently scoffing when I hear their parents bragging about them.
Why are you so bitter that you can’t just be happy for these kids that are doing well? On top of it your daughter is also doing great… why not be happy for all these kids whose parents’ choices allowed them to succeed?
What is wrong with the world?
Dp. Agreed. So much. The anti-red shirters always say that the maturity gap narrows. So apparently two kids who are a year apart of no big deal, but kids 18 months apart is the end of the world.
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