How to get her back? "The one that got away" recently divorced w/ 2 DC, messaged me.

[Anonymous]

When I was 25, I almost asked an amazing girl to marry me. But, I was not ready, and the relationship ended soon after I shared my feelings with her.

Last month, she initiated a conversation and we started messaging on FB. It escalated last week when we saw each other for the first time in over ten years.

I saw stars.

She's more amazing than I remembered, and I'd like to try again. She has 2 DC, 4 and 9, which I'm more than ok with.

How do I get her back, through the years and whatever is going on with the ex?

[Anonymous]

How long has she been divorced?

[Anonymous]

Are you single?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long has she been divorced?

Separated last December, divorce finalized last month.

[Anonymous]

How old are you now OP? This is a sweet story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you single?

Yes, I am single, never married.

Also, I'm 35 and ready to settle down. She's 33 and from what she tells me, really unsure about how to be out in the world after 10 years as an SAH mom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you now OP? This is a sweet story.

Thank you. I am 35, she is 33.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you single?

Yes, I am single, never married.

Also, I'm 35 and ready to settle down. She's 33 and from what she tells me, really unsure about how to be out in the world after 10 years as an SAH mom

As much as I love this story...she either got pregnant before you broke up or right after you left. Her first kid is 9 and she's 33 which puts her at 24 when s/he was born and that's a conservative estimate. I'm not saying people need to necessarily wait when moving on with their lives, but if I was in love with someone enough that they were ready to propose, I wouldn't be marrying and having a baby with someone else less than 6 months later.

You might be seeing stars but be very clear about her vision and her love for you before you go down that road. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Dude WTF? You are PATHETIC. There are thousands upon thousands of 30-something attractive single women in this area who do NOT have baggage or kids. Go find one.

Remember: she dumped you the first time and went and had kids with someone else. THIS WAS NOT MEANT TO BE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you single?

Yes, I am single, never married.

Also, I'm 35 and ready to settle down. She's 33 and from what she tells me, really unsure about how to be out in the world after 10 years as an SAH mom

After 10 yrs as a SAHM, she is looking for a new free ride. What is so amazing about her other than she married someone else and had kids ASAP after you broke up with her other than she is hot? Start thinking with the head above your shoulders.

[Anonymous]

Steer clear mate. Too much baggage. Dont be the rebound guy. Dont think with your little head!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you single?

Yes, I am single, never married.

Also, I'm 35 and ready to settle down. She's 33 and from what she tells me, really unsure about how to be out in the world after 10 years as an SAH mom

As much as I love this story...she either got pregnant before you broke up or right after you left. Her first kid is 9 and she's 33 which puts her at 24 when s/he was born and that's a conservative estimate. I'm not saying people need to necessarily wait when moving on with their lives, but if I was in love with someone enough that they were ready to propose, I wouldn't be marrying and having a baby with someone else less than 6 months later.

You might be seeing stars but be very clear about her vision and her love for you before you go down that road. Good luck!

I thought the same. OP, have you met her kids? You need to proceed very slowly. Kids are tough. And can you support a SAH wife and two kids plus your own?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dude WTF? You are PATHETIC. There are thousands upon thousands of 30-something attractive single women in this area who do NOT have baggage or kids. Go find one.

Remember: she dumped you the first time and went and had kids with someone else. THIS WAS NOT MEANT TO BE.

Haha, your ferocity is admirable if not telling.

Personally, I'm not the type to rush in and think with my little head. Her kids are amazing and well behaved.

I'm planning to take it slow, no idea what the future will hold. What I'm looking guidance on is how to set the ground work so she'll consider me.

Also, it's been more than 10 years, I rounded down. There was no chance the first child was conceived "on my watch".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dude WTF? You are PATHETIC. There are thousands upon thousands of 30-something attractive single women in this area who do NOT have baggage or kids. Go find one.

Remember: she dumped you the first time and went and had kids with someone else. THIS WAS NOT MEANT TO BE.

I'm planning to take it slow, no idea what the future will hold. What I'm looking guidance on is how to set the ground work so she'll consider me.

Also, it's been more than 10 years, I rounded down. There was no chance the first child was conceived "on my watch".

Okay then, I'd say ask her if she wants to meet up for lunch or coffee while the kids are at school. Progress to dinner and help figure out creative ways to find babysitters (you could pay for the babysitter or find a cousin who'll sit for her for free for a favor - whatever floats your boat) - just show her you're interested in her and understand that her kids come first & you're willing to work with that. Move on to attending the kid's games or having a 'family' picnic in the park.

Bottom line - talk to her face-to-face, see what she's looking for in life, explain where you're going, see if you're still a match, and make it clear you're not just looking for her ass but care about her kids as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dude WTF? You are PATHETIC. There are thousands upon thousands of 30-something attractive single women in this area who do NOT have baggage or kids. Go find one.

Remember: she dumped you the first time and went and had kids with someone else. THIS WAS NOT MEANT TO BE.

I'm planning to take it slow, no idea what the future will hold. What I'm looking guidance on is how to set the ground work so she'll consider me.

Also, it's been more than 10 years, I rounded down. There was no chance the first child was conceived "on my watch".

Okay then, I'd say ask her if she wants to meet up for lunch or coffee while the kids are at school. Progress to dinner and help figure out creative ways to find babysitters (you could pay for the babysitter or find a cousin who'll sit for her for free for a favor - whatever floats your boat) - just show her you're interested in her and understand that her kids come first & you're willing to work with that. Move on to attending the kid's games or having a 'family' picnic in the park.

Bottom line - talk to her face-to-face, see what she's looking for in life, explain where you're going, see if you're still a match, and make it clear you're not just looking for her ass but care about her kids as well.

If you can get a booty call out of this why not, for old time's sake