Single Guy Friend (33) Can't Find a Girlfriend

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think regardless of race, never having had a relationship in your 30s is often a red flag.

HUGE red flag. In 15 years, he hasn't been able to find someone who meets his standards who also wants to date him? Something's gotta give. And no women around his age or even much younger want to date a guy in his 30s who needs relationship training wheels.

[Anonymous]

I’m a white guy who married an Asian women who is probably of the type this guy is interested in. There definitely is a fear out there among some Asian women that if they marry an Asian guy, they will end up with someone who, despite statements to the contrary, will try to enforce traditional gender roles once wedding vows have been exchanged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think regardless of race, never having had a relationship in your 30s is often a red flag.

HUGE red flag. In 15 years, he hasn't been able to find someone who meets his standards who also wants to date him? Something's gotta give. And no women around his age or even much younger want to date a guy in his 30s who needs relationship training wheels.

in 15 years he couldn't lower his standards to the point where he could get a girlfriend. The guy may as well just were a defective badge

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think regardless of race, never having had a relationship in your 30s is often a red flag.

HUGE red flag. In 15 years, he hasn't been able to find someone who meets his standards who also wants to date him? Something's gotta give. And no women around his age or even much younger want to date a guy in his 30s who needs relationship training wheels.

in 15 years he couldn't lower his standards to the point where he could get a girlfriend. The guy may as well just were a defective badge

This. Eventually most women and men have to lower their standards. Being too "picky" about looks at age 33 of a red flag. He may need to accept dating an "average" asian woman who likes him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of Asian is he?

A lot of women, even Korean American women, don't want to do Korean American men because they say the culture is very sexist.

I have lots of East Asian Americans friends who have told me this.

He is Chinese. He grew up here and isn’t overtly sexist, but I’ll have to investigate, maybe he has some problematic underlying beliefs about what relationships should look like.

NP. He's 33. The women he wants (Chinese, beautiful, probably a bunch of other qualifications) who are his age have already been scooped up. The women who are single and younger than him that he wants want guys who are their age. Everyone i know who is Chinese or Chinese American is married by 33. If he won't date outside his racial or aesthetic preferences, he might need to try a matchmaker.

[Anonymous]

OP is he a Chinese Christian?

[Anonymous]

I'll bite. What are his parents like? I have a LOT of Asian and Chinese girl friends. They are reluctant to date Asian men because they're worried about the parent dynamics. A lot of the older Chinese generation expects to move in once their sons get married or expects a lot of subservience from DILs. And my friends really aren't interested. White inlaws don't have those expectations, so my friends mostly date white men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'll bite. What are his parents like? I have a LOT of Asian and Chinese girl friends. They are reluctant to date Asian men because they're worried about the parent dynamics. A lot of the older Chinese generation expects to move in once their sons get married or expects a lot of subservience from DILs. And my friends really aren't interested. White inlaws don't have those expectations, so my friends mostly date white men.

Yep, a lot of people do not want to live in a multi generational household

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'll bite. What are his parents like? I have a LOT of Asian and Chinese girl friends. They are reluctant to date Asian men because they're worried about the parent dynamics. A lot of the older Chinese generation expects to move in once their sons get married or expects a lot of subservience from DILs. And my friends really aren't interested. White inlaws don't have those expectations, so my friends mostly date white men.

One of my Asian girlfriend is stunningly beautiful, married young at 22 and divorced at 26. Shortly after she met a nice Asian man. we all loved seeing them together. But the guys parents were against the fact she was married before (no kids, just one of those marriage that fails when you marry too young).

Needless to say, she is with some white guy now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'll bite. What are his parents like? I have a LOT of Asian and Chinese girl friends. They are reluctant to date Asian men because they're worried about the parent dynamics. A lot of the older Chinese generation expects to move in once their sons get married or expects a lot of subservience from DILs. And my friends really aren't interested. White inlaws don't have those expectations, so my friends mostly date white men.

This is definitely true.

[Anonymous]

It is admittedly a tough world for Asian American men in the online dating zone. He needs to broaden his racial preferences and do something to differentiate himself, like not being a typical early-30s corporate guy with dad-bod.

[Anonymous]

What’s with people only dating their race? It’s like purposefully limiting yourself to a small pool. There are so many attractive people in this world if you stop dating only Xs.

[Anonymous]

Op does this guy speak Chinese at all?

[Anonymous]

Many of my Asian female friends' progressive parents (especially their mothers) warned them not to marry Asian men!

[Anonymous]

He has never dated at 33? He has no game.