SIL is really obtuse

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:SIL or BIL are not your business! They are your DH's. Get the memo that some OP screamed all over this forum.
Funny, many chimed in agreeing, yet here we are.

+1

There have been more SIL bashing threads than ever.

Add OP to the pile.

It's not bashing if the SIL is inconveniencing family to fly for a stupid reason like this.

A life threatening illness is a stupid reason?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:SIL or BIL are not your business! They are your DH's. Get the memo that some OP screamed all over this forum.
Funny, many chimed in agreeing, yet here we are.

+1

There have been more SIL bashing threads than ever.

Add OP to the pile.

It's not bashing if the SIL is inconveniencing family to fly for a stupid reason like this.

A life threatening illness is a stupid reason?

An illness that is self-inflicted? Tough. Are you an alcoholic too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:SIL or BIL are not your business! They are your DH's. Get the memo that some OP screamed all over this forum.
Funny, many chimed in agreeing, yet here we are.

+1

There have been more SIL bashing threads than ever.

Add OP to the pile.

It's not bashing if the SIL is inconveniencing family to fly for a stupid reason like this.

A life threatening illness is a stupid reason?

An illness that is self-inflicted? Tough. Are you an alcoholic too?

Sorry, are you using mental illness like an insult?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:SIL or BIL are not your business! They are your DH's. Get the memo that some OP screamed all over this forum.
Funny, many chimed in agreeing, yet here we are.

+1

There have been more SIL bashing threads than ever.

Add OP to the pile.

It's not bashing if the SIL is inconveniencing family to fly for a stupid reason like this.

A life threatening illness is a stupid reason?

An illness that is self-inflicted? Tough. Are you an alcoholic too?

Sorry, are you using mental illness like an insult?

I’m just stating the facts.

[Anonymous]

This board never ceases to not surprise me with the level of self involvement and lack of empathy to others. Well done, guys!

[Anonymous]

When Sils drink, it is not a mental illness, it is a choice.
When op/wife is depressed, anxious, even an alcoholic, on pot non-stop, it is bcs she had valid reasons.
Classic dcum!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When Sils drink, it is not a mental illness, it is a choice.
When op/wife is depressed, anxious, even an alcoholic, on pot non-stop, it is bcs she had valid reasons.
Classic dcum!

The alcoholic in this thread is a man. The OP is talking about her husband’s brother who is choosing to drink. And his wife is harassing OP’s husband to travel during a pandemic. Good on OP for enforcing boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When Sils drink, it is not a mental illness, it is a choice.
When op/wife is depressed, anxious, even an alcoholic, on pot non-stop, it is bcs she had valid reasons.
Classic dcum!

The alcoholic in this thread is a man. The OP is talking about her husband’s brother who is choosing to drink. And his wife is harassing OP’s husband to travel during a pandemic. Good on OP for enforcing boundaries.

Nope, they are both alcoholics; op added that detail later when people called her uncaring and meddling. I see that you and OP are made of the same, me first, god forbid DH spends a minute of his time not on me. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the biggest narcissist of all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When Sils drink, it is not a mental illness, it is a choice.
When op/wife is depressed, anxious, even an alcoholic, on pot non-stop, it is bcs she had valid reasons.
Classic dcum!

The alcoholic in this thread is a man. The OP is talking about her husband’s brother who is choosing to drink. And his wife is harassing OP’s husband to travel during a pandemic. Good on OP for enforcing boundaries.

Nope, they are both alcoholics; op added that detail later when people called her uncaring and meddling. I see that you and OP are made of the same, me first, god forbid DH spends a minute of his time not on me. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the biggest narcissist of all?

No, OP said the SIL is codependent and an enabler. Are you drunk ?

[Anonymous]

Maybe reach out to SIL’s sister on Facebook and tell her about the situation. SIL is indeed being obtuse and also probably embarrassed as most wives of alcoholics are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP again. SIL's DH is a narcissistic alcoholic who doesn't want to check himself in and she has been his enabler for years. She talks a lot about ending the marriage but is codependent and he manipulates her a lot. It's not like she didn't know who she was marrying. The affidavits would carry more weight from her sister and her sister's husband as they have dealt directly with SIL and DH's brother and know their problems first-hand (plus, the sister's husband is actual local law enforcement). My family of origin would know better than to involve me or DH in any problems. I don't know why people here get the impression that SIL's DH is going to die if his brother doesn't show up. That's NOT the case. He's probably just going to continue drinking. This isn't cancer or a true medical emergency. And SIL telling us that DH needs to spend time and money to get his brother sober is ridiculous on her part.

Wow. You have a lot to learn about alcoholism. It's absolutely deadly. And nothing here changes anything that anyone in this thread said.

Are you nuts? No one is forcing the guy to drink. What happened to personal responsibility?

PP here. You are an ignoramus. Even if brother was able to come how just go cold turkey from alcohol, he could DIE. Most long term alcoholics have a physical dependence that can result in death without a medically supervised detox, which he won’t do. It’s not simply a matter of “personal responsibility”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP again. SIL's DH is a narcissistic alcoholic who doesn't want to check himself in and she has been his enabler for years. She talks a lot about ending the marriage but is codependent and he manipulates her a lot. It's not like she didn't know who she was marrying. The affidavits would carry more weight from her sister and her sister's husband as they have dealt directly with SIL and DH's brother and know their problems first-hand (plus, the sister's husband is actual local law enforcement). My family of origin would know better than to involve me or DH in any problems. I don't know why people here get the impression that SIL's DH is going to die if his brother doesn't show up. That's NOT the case. He's probably just going to continue drinking. This isn't cancer or a true medical emergency. And SIL telling us that DH needs to spend time and money to get his brother sober is ridiculous on her part.

Wow. You have a lot to learn about alcoholism. It's absolutely deadly. And nothing here changes anything that anyone in this thread said.

Are you nuts? No one is forcing the guy to drink. What happened to personal responsibility?

PP here. You are an ignoramus. Even if brother was able to come how just go cold turkey from alcohol, he could DIE. Most long term alcoholics have a physical dependence that can result in death without a medically supervised detox, which he won’t do. It’s not simply a matter of “personal responsibility”

Yes, it is. My alcoholic brother had to have part of his eosophagus (sic) removed due to his drinking and while he was sober for 3 mths, he went back to drinking due to his (in his words), “my wife is fat and lazy and doesn’t clean, the kids won’t let me sleep, my wife complains about me to her family, I hate my job”. So instead of cleaning their house and figuring out things like a normal person, he just passes blame on his wife and coworkers. I agree his wife is a slob but drinking away ones liver is not how anyone should deal with problems. I’ve already told him and his wife, don’t come to me for a liver!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:SIL or BIL are not your business! They are your DH's. Get the memo that some OP screamed all over this forum.
Funny, many chimed in agreeing, yet here we are.

+1

There have been more SIL bashing threads than ever.

Add OP to the pile.

It's not bashing if the SIL is inconveniencing family to fly for a stupid reason like this.

A life threatening illness is a stupid reason?

An illness that is self-inflicted? Tough. Are you an alcoholic too?

NP here and I AM an alcoholic and you sound really mean and judgmental

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:SIL or BIL are not your business! They are your DH's. Get the memo that some OP screamed all over this forum.
Funny, many chimed in agreeing, yet here we are.

+1

There have been more SIL bashing threads than ever.

Add OP to the pile.

It's not bashing if the SIL is inconveniencing family to fly for a stupid reason like this.

A life threatening illness is a stupid reason?

An illness that is self-inflicted? Tough. Are you an alcoholic too?

NP here and I AM an alcoholic and you sound really mean and judgmental

Alcoholic inflict a ton of damage and so the judgement is warranted

[Anonymous]

It’s really not your decision.