Money woes...but not mine

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
As a foreigner on an 03 visa, may I ask why you highlighted the fact that the wife is originally not from the US?
Why did you note that she doesn't speak English well?
Do these attributes contribute to your resentment?

He asked for money, you can say no. It's as easy as that.

But I don't like you, OP. You come across as racist.

Team OP here. You bring someone from another country - you provide for her. Don’t expect your ex to cover your expenses. OP is not racist. She just doesn’t care about that woman.

But it’s irrelevant

[Anonymous]

If the food is too fattening/heavy, your son could just take very small servings. Bringing his own food is rude, especially if it’s only a few times a month.

On the main topic: at most, I would send a store card as others have suggested. $5,000 — no way!!

[Anonymous]

^^ Also, isn’t he entitled to some mortgage relief under the CARES Act?

[Anonymous]

Are you willing to gift your ex a few thousand dollars?
I wouldn’t.

It should have no bearing on how they treat your son. If they didn’t treat him well before they won’t start just because you’re giving them money.

[Anonymous]

I agree with others that new wife's citizenship status and origin is irrelevant.

However, OP, there is no way in hell I would give xDH any money. You don't owe him anything, he's got some guts to ask you for money! Also, if my DC were in that situation I absolutely would also send her with food.
Good luck, hope you can give us an update.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
As a foreigner on an 03 visa, may I ask why you highlighted the fact that the wife is originally not from the US?
Why did you note that she doesn't speak English well?
Do these attributes contribute to your resentment?

He asked for money, you can say no. It's as easy as that.

But I don't like you, OP. You come across as racist.

Team OP here. You bring someone from another country - you provide for her. Don’t expect your ex to cover your expenses. OP is not racist. She just doesn’t care about that woman.

That is not in dispute. The unspoken rules of online writing is that you don't add in irrelevant data, otherwise you're making it part of the discussion. WHY would OP note painstakingly that the wife is foreign, with limited English and cooks heavy carbs? It's evident that OP thinks less of this person because of these attributes. And that is NOT OK. It's xenophobic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should be providing support. I don’t understand why you didn’t before,

Wait, why should I support them? They are not my blood...

Your son is not your blood? I’m confused. Support for the non custodial parent as you out earn him.

Why would OP provide support when the other parent has no custody and the child only occasionally visits?

Sounds like visitation was regular before Covid. Yes she should be paying child support. It’s meant to equalize the difference in the incomes for the child.

Say what? The kid lives with her not dad and step family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should be providing support. I don’t understand why you didn’t before,

Wait, why should I support them? They are not my blood...

Your son is not your blood? I’m confused. Support for the non custodial parent as you out earn him.

Why would OP provide support when the other parent has no custody and the child only occasionally visits?

Sounds like visitation was regular before Covid. Yes she should be paying child support. It’s meant to equalize the difference in the incomes for the child.

Say what? The kid lives with her not dad and step family.

Child support is a formula with income, custody/visitation and more. If she makes that much more even with child visiting a few days a month, she could still owe child support.

[Anonymous]

Team Op here,
Tell him no and move on. I pack my ten old dd her food every two weeks. Dh new family and Dd is not allowed to eat their food.

[Anonymous]

Ex husband new family are overweight and dd is not allowed to eat their food.

[Anonymous]

Maybe OP added the new wife’s citizen status to explain why the wife does not work. The OP is divorced and we have to assumed she went thru the court system. The OP doesn’t pay alimony or child support—old news.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ex husband new family are overweight and dd is not allowed to eat their food.

Wow, you are nasty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex husband new family are overweight and dd is not allowed to eat their food.

Wow, you are nasty.

Are you overweight?

That's the problem. If OP doesn't want her dd or son to eat unhealthy food. She has the right to control her kid eating habits. I wish more parents did what op is doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I could afford to do so, I would pay two months mortgage and send the check to mortgage company myself. I would also give them a $200 gift card to grocery store and tell them both mortgage and gift card are gifts and there will be no more.

This is likely what I would do but one month.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex husband new family are overweight and dd is not allowed to eat their food.

Wow, you are nasty.

Are you overweight?

That's the problem. If OP doesn't want her dd or son to eat unhealthy food. She has the right to control her kid eating habits. I wish more parents did what op is doing.

If a child goes over a few days a month, child can eat the food. You making weight comments and saying you cannot eat the food is a pretty cruel thing to do to a child. If you don't want your child eating the food and being a part of Dad's life, then just say so. Terminate his rights and move on. Otherwise, in Dad's home it is Dad's way of doing things. Once you divorce you lose the right to dictate what goes on in the other parents home.