My boss and I kissed

[Anonymous]

Not to jump on the romance bandwagon, but there were two families at my preschool where the new mom had been the nanny before. One was a divorce situation (nanny hired after the divorce so no shenanigans) and one where the mother had died. No one gave it another thought.

Then of course there was the Erik Prince thing, but he is an a$$hole.

[Anonymous]

The boss is vulnerable and needy. The nanny is there, and checks off a box. This is exploitative.

[Anonymous]

Omg you are 38, nannying, the guy is probably higher on the social ladder, this is a great chance! You have 6 months to make him think about delaying the move or taking you along.
And you are still thinking?????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The boss is vulnerable and needy. The nanny is there, and checks off a box. This is exploitative.

How do you figure?
Yes he lost his wife and that's sad, but that doesn't mean he's a victim.
I don't think he's preying on OP either.
I think what we have are two people brought together under albeit unfortunate circumstances who are falling for each other. As others have pointed out it wouldn't be the first time something like this has happened.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What lead up to the kiss?

It was one of the nights I work a bit later. He came back a little earlier than usual. The kids begged me to stay for the end of the movie. I agreed, they fell asleep. I made my way to leave. He saw me to the door. He made fun of my hat. Then he thanked me for hosting some of his family the week before and we kissed. It really just sort of happened. As it was happening it didn't seem wrong at all. I know that doesn't make any sense. I'm pretty sure I said thank you and then I left.
The next time I saw him he apologized.

Need more details on the kiss?

Who initiated it?
How long did it last? Was it chaste?
Who pulled away first?
You said he apologized? How has his behavior been since?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The boss is vulnerable and needy. The nanny is there, and checks off a box. This is exploitative.

+1 Especially if OP knew the wife. Is her grave even cold? Poor taste all around!

[Anonymous]

Wait a minute... how do you know how she tastes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The boss is vulnerable and needy. The nanny is there, and checks off a box. This is exploitative.

+1 Especially if OP knew the wife. Is her grave even cold? Poor taste all around!

I never knew his wife. I started working for him after she had passed. Believe me if I had known her I would never be attracted to him now. It's not now not has it ever been my intention to seduce him. I didn't go looking for a job with a widower. This is the job I was matched with.

And to the person or persons who keep suggesting I tell the kids to call me mommy that's sick and I'm not a weirdo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What lead up to the kiss?

It was one of the nights I work a bit later. He came back a little earlier than usual. The kids begged me to stay for the end of the movie. I agreed, they fell asleep. I made my way to leave. He saw me to the door. He made fun of my hat. Then he thanked me for hosting some of his family the week before and we kissed. It really just sort of happened. As it was happening it didn't seem wrong at all. I know that doesn't make any sense. I'm pretty sure I said thank you and then I left.
The next time I saw him he apologized.

Need more details on the kiss?

Who initiated it?
How long did it last? Was it chaste?
Who pulled away first?
You said he apologized? How has his behavior been since?[/quote]

I think it was mutual, maybe slightly more him. It's hard to say , because literally we were talking one second and kissing the next.
Not long, probably not even a minute. I suppose it was chaste buy it was definitely a kiss. I meet our lips touched.
We sort of just stopped.
Things have been normal I guess. Except now I can't stop thinking about kissing him.

[Anonymous]

Op, this isn’t a bad situation. My DW and I have a daughter who absolutely loves a baby sitter we have on a regular basis. If something ever happened to DW she would be on the short list for someone I would want to date seriously. Honestly I have no idea if she would even be interested but I have a hard time fathoming dating and bringing women around who would see my DD as an inconvenience, or absolutely love spending time with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, this isn’t a bad situation. My DW and I have a daughter who absolutely loves a baby sitter we have on a regular basis. If something ever happened to DW she would be on the short list for someone I would want to date seriously. Honestly I have no idea if she would even be interested but I have a hard time fathoming dating and bringing women around who would see my DD as an inconvenience, or absolutely love spending time with her.

Women need to listen to what this man is saying. He is lining up your replacement before you die. Seriously, what happens when you are sick or having problems in the marriage? Women don't do this.

I have never heard a women talk about her husband's replacement when his blood is still warm and coursing through his veins.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What lead up to the kiss?

It was one of the nights I work a bit later. He came back a little earlier than usual. The kids begged me to stay for the end of the movie. I agreed, they fell asleep. I made my way to leave. He saw me to the door. He made fun of my hat. Then he thanked me for hosting some of his family the week before and we kissed. It really just sort of happened. As it was happening it didn't seem wrong at all. I know that doesn't make any sense. I'm pretty sure I said thank you and then I left.
The next time I saw him he apologized.

Need more details on the kiss?

Who initiated it?
How long did it last? Was it chaste?
Who pulled away first?
You said he apologized? How has his behavior been since?[/quote]

I think it was mutual, maybe slightly more him. It's hard to say , because literally we were talking one second and kissing the next.
Not long, probably not even a minute. I suppose it was chaste buy it was definitely a kiss. I meet our lips touched.
We sort of just stopped.
Things have been normal I guess. Except now I can't stop thinking about kissing him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, this isn’t a bad situation. My DW and I have a daughter who absolutely loves a baby sitter we have on a regular basis. If something ever happened to DW she would be on the short list for someone I would want to date seriously. Honestly I have no idea if she would even be interested but I have a hard time fathoming dating and bringing women around who would see my DD as an inconvenience, or absolutely love spending time with her.

Women need to listen to what this man is saying. He is lining up your replacement before you die. Seriously, what happens when you are sick or having problems in the marriage? Women don't do this.

I have never heard a women talk about her husband's replacement when his blood is still warm and coursing through his veins.

+1
WTF?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, this isn’t a bad situation. My DW and I have a daughter who absolutely loves a baby sitter we have on a regular basis. If something ever happened to DW she would be on the short list for someone I would want to date seriously. Honestly I have no idea if she would even be interested but I have a hard time fathoming dating and bringing women around who would see my DD as an inconvenience, or absolutely love spending time with her.

Women need to listen to what this man is saying. He is lining up your replacement before you die. Seriously, what happens when you are sick or having problems in the marriage? Women don't do this.

I have never heard a women talk about her husband's replacement when his blood is still warm and coursing through his veins.

+1
WTF?

If wife knew she’d have that sitter fired ASAP

[Anonymous]

You are wasting your time
Do not date a guy with kids
Do not date a guy who is in love with a ghost

Date a guy who is in love with you
A for whom you are his first choice

This guy would not go for you if his wife was alive. You are not her and he is still in love with her, not you

He is just being lazy