Dating Divorced Older Men

[Anonymous]

I’m in my 50’s and divorced and I never would go up to a random stranger in a store etc and ask her out. I assume she would think I’m a creep or worse. If I had seen the woman multiple times and we were in the smile and say hi phase then I would. I really prefer meeting someone at some social situation that results in a conversation and then I might ask her out. I’m not a big fan of on line dating as more often then not it’s a let down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my 50’s and divorced and I never would go up to a random stranger in a store etc and ask her out. I assume she would think I’m a creep or worse. If I had seen the woman multiple times and we were in the smile and say hi phase then I would. I really prefer meeting someone at some social situation that results in a conversation and then I might ask her out. I’m not a big fan of on line dating as more often then not it’s a let down.

Yes, it is a big letdown. Online dating brings out the worse in people. I am a very active person who attends events regularly, and I have been only asked out once in the last year. And no, I am not fat, no unattractive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my 50’s and divorced and I never would go up to a random stranger in a store etc and ask her out. I assume she would think I’m a creep or worse. If I had seen the woman multiple times and we were in the smile and say hi phase then I would. I really prefer meeting someone at some social situation that results in a conversation and then I might ask her out. I’m not a big fan of on line dating as more often then not it’s a let down.

Yes, it is a big letdown. Online dating brings out the worse in people. I am a very active person who attends events regularly, and I have been only asked out once in the last year. And no, I am not fat, no unattractive.

People who constantly tell people that they are fat or unattractive and equate both or tell people that both are the reason no one will approach or love them must never have been loved before. I've always had "admirers" at all weights and looks. I got more when I was thinner, but even at my rock bottom looks-wise, I still got interested men. And I'm not talking trashy interested men. Good, decent looking, decent performing men. That's always surprised me. The message we receive is only attractive and beautiful women (or men) are datable. In the real world, you might be attractive for much more than one thing and many people can find you attractive to them, and it's all that matters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

Another time traveler from the 1950s. I haven't seen a secretary in a workplace for nearly 30 years.

I guess you haven't seen a Dentist or a Doctor in 30 years either. Gross.

Every dentist office I've been to for the past 20 years has been all-female; female dentists, female hygienists, female front office staff.

Do these dentists sleep with or marry their admins? I don't know, and I don't care.

Umm, way to miss the point. A PP claimed the profession of secretary has gone the way of the Do Do. My own personal experience is that Doctor and Dentist offices still have them, as well as many, many, many other workplaces, mine included.

I'd also add that "front office staff" is synonymous with secretary, but your mileage may vary.

Call your front office staff "secretaries" and come back here and tell us their reaction.

We are talking concept, buddy, not semantics. No wonder you are having such a hard time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

Another time traveler from the 1950s. I haven't seen a secretary in a workplace for nearly 30 years.

I guess you haven't seen a Dentist or a Doctor in 30 years either. Gross.

Every dentist office I've been to for the past 20 years has been all-female; female dentists, female hygienists, female front office staff.

Do these dentists sleep with or marry their admins? I don't know, and I don't care.

Umm, way to miss the point. A PP claimed the profession of secretary has gone the way of the Do Do. My own personal experience is that Doctor and Dentist offices still have them, as well as many, many, many other workplaces, mine included.

I'd also add that "front office staff" is synonymous with secretary, but your mileage may vary.

Umm, you are the one who missed the point.
A PP said that older divorced guys marry their secretary.
Another PP said that nobody has secretaries any more and they never see them.
A PP responded "you must not have seen a doctor or dentist" - obviously implying that doctors and dentists have secretaries.
Another PP said dental offices are largely all-female now - obviously implying that a female dentist is not going to marry her female secretary.

Do you need any more spoon-feeding?

Found the bigot. You do know that women can marry women, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my 50’s and divorced and I never would go up to a random stranger in a store etc and ask her out. I assume she would think I’m a creep or worse. If I had seen the woman multiple times and we were in the smile and say hi phase then I would. I really prefer meeting someone at some social situation that results in a conversation and then I might ask her out. I’m not a big fan of on line dating as more often then not it’s a let down.

OK, so, you remember the 1980s when there was no internet dating, and you had to approach women in person and ask them out? Did you not date back then? It's no different now. Except hey, you are now far more mature and experienced, and have experienced in-person rejection many times, so it is no big deal if the woman says "sorry, not interested".

Approaching women in public without seeming "creepy" is a skill that can be learned, and I suggest you learn it. Not hard, I promise!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Found the bigot. You do know that women can marry women, right?

Found the humorless idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my 50’s and divorced and I never would go up to a random stranger in a store etc and ask her out. I assume she would think I’m a creep or worse. If I had seen the woman multiple times and we were in the smile and say hi phase then I would. I really prefer meeting someone at some social situation that results in a conversation and then I might ask her out. I’m not a big fan of on line dating as more often then not it’s a let down.

OK, so, you remember the 1980s when there was no internet dating, and you had to approach women in person and ask them out? Did you not date back then? It's no different now. Except hey, you are now far more mature and experienced, and have experienced in-person rejection many times, so it is no big deal if the woman says "sorry, not interested".

Approaching women in public without seeming "creepy" is a skill that can be learned, and I suggest you learn it. Not hard, I promise!

Tell that to the #metoo people who have led women to believe all men are guilty until proven innocent. I have no problem approaching women and asking them out but the setting needs to right. The meat counter at Safeway is not the right setting! A gallery opening is a great setting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Found the bigot. You do know that women can marry women, right?

Found the humorless idiot.

What's funny about being a bigot?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Found the bigot. You do know that women can marry women, right?

Found the humorless idiot.

What's funny about being a bigot?

If you failed to see the humor in that post, you just might be a humorless idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my 50’s and divorced and I never would go up to a random stranger in a store etc and ask her out. I assume she would think I’m a creep or worse. If I had seen the woman multiple times and we were in the smile and say hi phase then I would. I really prefer meeting someone at some social situation that results in a conversation and then I might ask her out. I’m not a big fan of on line dating as more often then not it’s a let down.

OK, so, you remember the 1980s when there was no internet dating, and you had to approach women in person and ask them out? Did you not date back then? It's no different now. Except hey, you are now far more mature and experienced, and have experienced in-person rejection many times, so it is no big deal if the woman says "sorry, not interested".

Approaching women in public without seeming "creepy" is a skill that can be learned, and I suggest you learn it. Not hard, I promise!

Tell that to the #metoo people who have led women to believe all men are guilty until proven innocent. I have no problem approaching women and asking them out but the setting needs to right. The meat counter at Safeway is not the right setting! A gallery opening is a great setting.

#metoo accusations only happen to creepy, unattractive men. Don't be creepy and unattractive. If Jason Momoa approached her at the Safeway meat counter, she would not recoil in disgust and file a #metoo report.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Found the bigot. You do know that women can marry women, right?

Found the humorless idiot.

What's funny about being a bigot?

If you failed to see the humor in that post, you just might be a humorless idiot.

Oh. Is this where you tell us that jokes with the N word can still be 'funny'?

[Anonymous]

OK, so, you remember the 1980s when there was no internet dating, and you had to approach women in person and ask them out? Did you not date back then? It's no different now. Except hey, you are now far more mature and experienced, and have experienced in-person rejection many times, so it is no big deal if the woman says "sorry, not interested".

Approaching women in public without seeming "creepy" is a skill that can be learned, and I suggest you learn it. Not hard, I promise!

I did date back then. I am also dating now and I found that, wait for it, it is 2019!!! And in the brave new world of online dating, women can approach (e.g., message, etc.) men. On Match.com, women often let me know they are interested which is, and should be, empowering.

It is no big deal when a woman tells a man she is not interested. The same holds true when men do not ask a woman out, even when she believes she is attractive, is very fit, etc. If you are woman who is not getting the number of dates you want you should to do something different in your social life. However, offering men advice on how they should approach women is not that "something".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OK, so, you remember the 1980s when there was no internet dating, and you had to approach women in person and ask them out? Did you not date back then? It's no different now. Except hey, you are now far more mature and experienced, and have experienced in-person rejection many times, so it is no big deal if the woman says "sorry, not interested".

Approaching women in public without seeming "creepy" is a skill that can be learned, and I suggest you learn it. Not hard, I promise!

I did date back then. I am also dating now and I found that, wait for it, it is 2019!!! And in the brave new world of online dating, women can approach (e.g., message, etc.) men. On Match.com, women often let me know they are interested which is, and should be, empowering.

It is no big deal when a woman tells a man she is not interested. The same holds true when men do not ask a woman out, even when she believes she is attractive, is very fit, etc. If you are woman who is not getting the number of dates you want you should to do something different in your social life. However, offering men advice on how they should approach women is not that "something".

If you, as a man, sit around and wait for women to approach you online, you will wait a long time, and the quality of the women who approach you will not be as high as if you met them in person.

What you need to change, most of all, is your mental state. You think approaching women in the "wrong" place like Safeway will lead to trouble. This is the kind of mentality that actually will lead to trouble (or at the very least, lack of success) for you, because women can smell the stink of your "I know she's going to think I'm creepy and reject me" anxious mentality a mile away. You should get yourself into a mental state such that you believe that you are a great guy and it's perfectly OK for you to approach women anywhere. This will even help you in your interactions with women whom you have met online.

It should not be a surprise to you that women are attracted to confidence. Sadly, it's obvious that you don't have it.

[Anonymous]

I cannot decide if PP and the guy she (?) is responding to have mad sexual tension or if she just likes to lecture