Dating Divorced Older Men

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many older men who have divorced after long marriages are reluctant to marry again. I get that. Many seem to want sex only relationships after years of bickering, compromising, and general marital turmoil. I get it.

Why do you try to date again after marriage instead of paying for sex (in a place where it is legal), or being upfront about nsa relationships?

If he had sex with you once - or maybe, dated you for weeks or even a few months -- and then moved on, he was not necessarily looking for "sex only". He could well have been looking for a relationship. He just decided not to have it with you. And that's fine, because you have also had sex with guys, decided it "wasn't clicking", and then moved on, right?

OP, here. i realize its a game. I do. For me, a FWB is a man under 42 who came still perform a couple of times a night and give me morning sex. I realize this. It's why i withhold sex from a guy over 45 until I can see that it is serious. I am very, very fit for my age, so its hard finding a guy who is 50 that isn't one and done.

The problem is you OP. Men are one and done with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If all you want is sex it's better to date married men because the divorced ones have a lot of emotional baggage.

BREAKING NEWS: If you are having sex with a married man who is not your husband, he has some emotional baggage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many older men who have divorced after long marriages are reluctant to marry again. I get that. Many seem to want sex only relationships after years of bickering, compromising, and general marital turmoil. I get it.

Why do you try to date again after marriage instead of paying for sex (in a place where it is legal), or being upfront about nsa relationships?

If he had sex with you once - or maybe, dated you for weeks or even a few months -- and then moved on, he was not necessarily looking for "sex only". He could well have been looking for a relationship. He just decided not to have it with you. And that's fine, because you have also had sex with guys, decided it "wasn't clicking", and then moved on, right?

OP, here. i realize its a game. I do. For me, a FWB is a man under 42 who came still perform a couple of times a night and give me morning sex. I realize this. It's why i withhold sex from a guy over 45 until I can see that it is serious. I am very, very fit for my age, so its hard finding a guy who is 50 that isn't one and done.

OP, you are all over the map with your complaints here. At first you were grumbling about older guys who don't want to remarry, they just want sex. Now you are grumbling that the older guys who just want sex can't perform. Exactly what is it that happened recently that got you all worked up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many older men who have divorced after long marriages are reluctant to marry again. I get that. Many seem to want sex only relationships after years of bickering, compromising, and general marital turmoil. I get it.

Why do you try to date again after marriage instead of paying for sex (in a place where it is legal), or being upfront about nsa relationships?

If he had sex with you once - or maybe, dated you for weeks or even a few months -- and then moved on, he was not necessarily looking for "sex only". He could well have been looking for a relationship. He just decided not to have it with you. And that's fine, because you have also had sex with guys, decided it "wasn't clicking", and then moved on, right?

OP, here. i realize its a game. I do. For me, a FWB is a man under 42 who came still perform a couple of times a night and give me morning sex. I realize this. It's why i withhold sex from a guy over 45 until I can see that it is serious. I am very, very fit for my age, so its hard finding a guy who is 50 that isn't one and done.

My 58 year old husband is definitely not one and done but I am but I'm not giving him up! I don't think he has anything to complain about given I give it my all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many older men who have divorced after long marriages are reluctant to marry again. I get that. Many seem to want sex only relationships after years of bickering, compromising, and general marital turmoil. I get it.

Why do you try to date again after marriage instead of paying for sex (in a place where it is legal), or being upfront about nsa relationships?

If he had sex with you once - or maybe, dated you for weeks or even a few months -- and then moved on, he was not necessarily looking for "sex only". He could well have been looking for a relationship. He just decided not to have it with you. And that's fine, because you have also had sex with guys, decided it "wasn't clicking", and then moved on, right?

OP, here. i realize its a game. I do. For me, a FWB is a man under 42 who came still perform a couple of times a night and give me morning sex. I realize this. It's why i withhold sex from a guy over 45 until I can see that it is serious. I am very, very fit for my age, so its hard finding a guy who is 50 that isn't one and done.

My 58 year old husband is definitely not one and done but I am but I'm not giving him up! I don't think he has anything to complain about given I give it my all.

Wow, you have a gem! He must be pretty physically fit too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

Another time traveler from the 1950s. I haven't seen a secretary in a workplace for nearly 30 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many older men who have divorced after long marriages are reluctant to marry again. I get that. Many seem to want sex only relationships after years of bickering, compromising, and general marital turmoil. I get it.

Why do you try to date again after marriage instead of paying for sex (in a place where it is legal), or being upfront about nsa relationships?

If he had sex with you once - or maybe, dated you for weeks or even a few months -- and then moved on, he was not necessarily looking for "sex only". He could well have been looking for a relationship. He just decided not to have it with you. And that's fine, because you have also had sex with guys, decided it "wasn't clicking", and then moved on, right?

OP, here. i realize its a game. I do. For me, a FWB is a man under 42 who came still perform a couple of times a night and give me morning sex. I realize this. It's why i withhold sex from a guy over 45 until I can see that it is serious. I am very, very fit for my age, so its hard finding a guy who is 50 that isn't one and done.

My 58 year old husband is definitely not one and done but I am but I'm not giving him up! I don't think he has anything to complain about given I give it my all.

Wow, you have a gem! He must be pretty physically fit too.

PP - he is a gem and he's very fit for a man his age. His parents are in their late 80's and still very active so he comes from a good gene pool. While I'm one and done I often surprise him in the morning when it's "obvious" he's ready.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find they fall into general categories. First, you have the divorced 50+ year olds with DCs under the age of 6 and want someone to help raise their kids or just have little to give because they need to take care of small DCs...I take a hard pass on these as I am done with small children. Second, you have the ones that are IMHO are just weak and/or have a negative outlook...bitter about their lot in life, their exes, their children, their career, etc. These also get a hard pass. Third, you have the players...I’ll date them knowing it’s nothing serious and I’ll also lump in the narcissistic types who are not relationship material. Fourth, you have nice guys who got married young or they just were not compatible with their first wives or are widowers but there is no chemistry...I’ll date until I can ascertain if their is chemistry and then part ways (some have stayed friends). At this stage in my life...I am active, fit, fun, adventurous, done with kids, financially secure and want serious chemistry....if I never find that Unicorn...I am okay with that but I am not settling.

How old are you and at what age did you divorce?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

Another time traveler from the 1950s. I haven't seen a secretary in a workplace for nearly 30 years.

I guess you haven't seen a Dentist or a Doctor in 30 years either. Gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

Another time traveler from the 1950s. I haven't seen a secretary in a workplace for nearly 30 years.

I guess you haven't seen a Dentist or a Doctor in 30 years either. Gross.

Every dentist office I've been to for the past 20 years has been all-female; female dentists, female hygienists, female front office staff.

Do these dentists sleep with or marry their admins? I don't know, and I don't care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

Another time traveler from the 1950s. I haven't seen a secretary in a workplace for nearly 30 years.

I guess you haven't seen a Dentist or a Doctor in 30 years either. Gross.

Every dentist office I've been to for the past 20 years has been all-female; female dentists, female hygienists, female front office staff.

Do these dentists sleep with or marry their admins? I don't know, and I don't care.

Umm, way to miss the point. A PP claimed the profession of secretary has gone the way of the Do Do. My own personal experience is that Doctor and Dentist offices still have them, as well as many, many, many other workplaces, mine included.

I'd also add that "front office staff" is synonymous with secretary, but your mileage may vary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because most of the older divorced guys I know are looking to remarry immediately so they have someone to tale care of them.

Puke.

Yes their marry their cubby secretary who then convinced them to have more kids and she will sAH. Disaster!

Another time traveler from the 1950s. I haven't seen a secretary in a workplace for nearly 30 years.

I guess you haven't seen a Dentist or a Doctor in 30 years either. Gross.

Every dentist office I've been to for the past 20 years has been all-female; female dentists, female hygienists, female front office staff.

Do these dentists sleep with or marry their admins? I don't know, and I don't care.

Umm, way to miss the point. A PP claimed the profession of secretary has gone the way of the Do Do. My own personal experience is that Doctor and Dentist offices still have them, as well as many, many, many other workplaces, mine included.

I'd also add that "front office staff" is synonymous with secretary, but your mileage may vary.

Now secretaries are called assistants or executive assistants. But the work is basically the same.

[Anonymous]

If you think dating an older divorced man is hard, try dating an older divorced woman!

[Anonymous]

if I never find that Unicorn...I am okay with that but I am not settling

Ah the sand in the gears of dating past 40 or 50: the unicorn hunter.