At what point does a favor become a burden?

[Anonymous]

OP, you were nice but if you are not able or dont want to do it anymore then say that your not able. They can find babysitter or themselves.

[Anonymous]

Im not even a particularly giving person but I would not minding doing that indefinitely. Whats 10 minutes for me could easily be 30 for her. Bundling up twins and getting them into their seats and then all again when you get back in 4 minutes is so so much engery! Plus the chances of one of them sleeping is pretty high and who wants to f*ck with a sleeping infant, let alone two!

[Anonymous]

Why can't OP's kids and neighbor's kids just all walk to the bus stop together without OP or the neighbor-mom? They are elementary school age. ???

[Anonymous]

Who drives to the bus stop? Why are you driving to the bus stop?

[Anonymous]

This is OP, and wow, this really took off.

To clear some things up:
-It will be a month this week I’ve been doing this.
-We drive because we are in a gated community and the bus picks up at the front.
-We could walk, but I head right to work. I don’t have time to walk back.
-Yes, it takes an extra 10 minutes because I don’t want to be late for any reason and then have to drive them all to school. I’ve been allowing extra time in case someone is running behind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How does it take an 10 minutes? How close do they live to you? Are they not ready when you are?

Are you dense? She’s not leaving and going from A to B. She’s leaving and going to another house, parking, waiting for kids to come out (even if they are ready, they still have to come out, get in, plop down backpacks, strap in, and THEN drive to B.

Nope, not dense. Just thinking that 10 minutes sounds like an exaggeration to me. The extra time is driving to the neighbor's house (is that 1 minute? 3?) and waiting for the kids to get buckled. Obviously, if the kids aren't waiting at the door, shoes on and ready to go, that part of the equation could be improved. But I suspect OP just doesn't want to help. That's fine. But just think of the favors they'll owe her in the future!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP, and wow, this really took off.

To clear some things up:
-It will be a month this week I’ve been doing this.
-We drive because we are in a gated community and the bus picks up at the front.
-We could walk, but I head right to work. I don’t have time to walk back.
-Yes, it takes an extra 10 minutes because I don’t want to be late for any reason and then have to drive them all to school. I’ve been allowing extra time in case someone is running behind.

Being in a gated community doesn't explain why everyone can't walk to the gate. How far is it?
Also, how close was/is your relationship with her? I'd be pretty annoyed if someone I wasn't really friends with asked me to do this for a month with no end in sight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP, and wow, this really took off.

To clear some things up:
-It will be a month this week I’ve been doing this.
-We drive because we are in a gated community and the bus picks up at the front.
-We could walk, but I head right to work. I don’t have time to walk back.
-Yes, it takes an extra 10 minutes because I don’t want to be late for any reason and then have to drive them all to school. I’ve been allowing extra time in case someone is running behind.

Being in a gated community doesn't explain why everyone can't walk to the gate. How far is it?
Also, how close was/is your relationship with her? I'd be pretty annoyed if someone I wasn't really friends with asked me to do this for a month with no end in sight.

READ.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Weeks???
With twins?

Have a heart and do it until it starts to warm up again in the Spring, OP.

Omg, do people not know how to warm up their cars and keep them running? Will this woman and children hibernate ALL winter? Surely they travel other places, right?

I hate when people have more kids than they can handle and make it everyone else’s problem. It’s not OPs problem. I had winter babies and they all survived. Bundle them up and turn on the heat.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP, and wow, this really took off.

To clear some things up:
-It will be a month this week I’ve been doing this.
-We drive because we are in a gated community and the bus picks up at the front.
-We could walk, but I head right to work. I don’t have time to walk back.
-Yes, it takes an extra 10 minutes because I don’t want to be late for any reason and then have to drive them all to school. I’ve been allowing extra time in case someone is running behind.

Being in a gated community doesn't explain why everyone can't walk to the gate. How far is it?
Also, how close was/is your relationship with her? I'd be pretty annoyed if someone I wasn't really friends with asked me to do this for a month with no end in sight.

You people are insane! OP said she goes right to work! She isn’t walking because she has her own obligations! Now you want her to take the kids and WALK them too? Why can’t the mom walk her kids? Wtf!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP, and wow, this really took off.

To clear some things up:
-It will be a month this week I’ve been doing this.
-We drive because we are in a gated community and the bus picks up at the front.
-We could walk, but I head right to work. I don’t have time to walk back.
-Yes, it takes an extra 10 minutes because I don’t want to be late for any reason and then have to drive them all to school. I’ve been allowing extra time in case someone is running behind.

Being in a gated community doesn't explain why everyone can't walk to the gate. How far is it?
Also, how close was/is your relationship with her? I'd be pretty annoyed if someone I wasn't really friends with asked me to do this for a month with no end in sight.

READ.

They meant all the kids. INFER.

[Anonymous]

I'm on Team Help Out. Come on! It is a few minutes of your day that means a lot to another person.

[Anonymous]

Beyond whether OP should continue or not, the bigger issue is that it seems the OP does not feel appreciated. Does this neighbor show her gratitude in any way OP? Text you a 'thanks again for your help' every so often or send their child out with a package of store bought muffins one time? It isn't the actual task that OP is doing but that she feels taking for granted. And that is a pretty lousy way to feel when doing anyone a favor.

[Anonymous]

This would really annoy me. It reminds me of a time I offered to help someone with their dog when they were going through a rough time. Six months later I still had their dog - and it was actually becoming a problem.

Eventually I had to just say to the person: we need another plan. I think that's fair to say in this case, too. Just be like, I've been so glad to be able to help you out but I won't be able to do it past the end of the week. Make up an excuse or don't.

[Anonymous]

^ and just to add: I am the biggest dog lover you will ever meet in your entire life. (Not that anyone cares about my situation with the dog; I just still feel guilty and defensive.) It was a favor I was glad to give, that went on for too long.