How to tell another parent on the team to shut the F#%k up

[Anonymous]

I ended up reporting bad coaching to the league office. The two parents were a nightmare who didn't seem to understand the Kindergarteners don't play in the World Cup! The league ended up banning them.

[Anonymous]

My son played soccer on a mostly Hispanic team. People are very prejudice against Hispanic kids in soccer. We had so many issues with parents yelling at our parents and at our kids calling them names. Kids on the field would tell them to "go back to their country".

I had to get tournament officials involved on many occasions to control the way parents, kids and officials treated our team.

It's sad but true, that people think Hispanic people are 'out of control" when they are playing soccer. Yes they yell a lot in Spanish but it was no more than the other parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a laid back parent and like to cheer for the players, even if it's on the other team if it's a good play. We have a parent that thinks he's Messi and can't wait to coach the kids, in fact he paces up and down the sidelines screaming in spanish/english at the kids (including his own). Fearing for his health I told him to relax and let the coach....coach. He said these kids aren't doing this right and how that's not the right way to play the ball. He claims to have played college ball, but from the looks of him I can't even tell he went to college. We had a tournament over the weekend and after the second game I could not take anymore. I walked up and asked nicely that the families weren't comfortable with his sideline antics and that I personally felt the refs targeting out kids because of him. He then asked who and I told him I was one and that was all that counted. He took that as me trying to challenge him. I walked away and on the second day he was a bit better, but still a nut job. I don't know what else to do and none of the other families are doing anything but complaining to each other about his behavior. Team manager is great, but chicken shit. I don't want it to get violent, but I'll admit it has crossed my mind. Coach has asked him to chill a few times with little improvement.

Before you judge, I've actually moved away a few times so I don't have to hear it, but when the players are actually acknowledging this idiot and looking away from the game it pisses me off.

Maybe instead of challenging him, you can help him. It sounds like he get excited during the game. Talk to him before the game. Tell him you may have came off as an asshole the other day. It's not really good to yell and /or coach the kids during the game(most league/clubs have rules against it). It's also not good for the the kids. They are only x years old. They are learning how to play the game and will not do everything right....but we have the coach who will coach them up. Let's hang out during the game and if you get excited talk to me. It could help. After all we do not want to penalize the team or have the coach red carded.

[Anonymous]

Seeing as how this is spinning out of control, I think the ones that actually had great suggestions. To all the trolling comedians out there, karma sucks. Have a great week and wonderful soccer season.

[Anonymous]

Ignore the comments and it sounds like you have done what you can. Let the club handle it. I was a player (different sport) and I just heard sounds, no words so the kids probably aren't even hearing him.

STOP playing the race card folks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This could be a cultural difference and his antics could be perfectly acceptable in his culture but not here. I would talk to the coach, since you already tried to talk to him, it should fall on the coach to deal with this.

This is an interesting point. At least, it's interesting to everyone except the race police in here.

That said, I wonder what would happen if a parent tried this nonsense at Barcelona or an elite Central American club. I'd imagine he would be escorted from the grounds with all due speed.

[Anonymous]

You sound equally wacko. Just ignore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous note, preferably from several different parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound equally wacko. Just ignore.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He racist because he said the parent is yelling in Spanish?

Pointing out that he is yelling in Spanish only serves one purpose.

Right... pointing out that he is yelling in Spanish.

Pointing out that he is yelling would have sufficed. No need to detail his language or question whether he actually went to college. None of that matters aside from painting a picture of an uneducated Hispanic man.

These microagressions / triggers are why Trump won the White House. Stop labeling everything racist, the vast majority of people don't agree with the narrative, and only pushes the moderates further from the Center - and I'm a Democrat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son played soccer on a mostly Hispanic team. People are very prejudice against Hispanic kids in soccer. We had so many issues with parents yelling at our parents and at our kids calling them names. Kids on the field would tell them to "go back to their country".

I had to get tournament officials involved on many occasions to control the way parents, kids and officials treated our team.

It's sad but true, that people think Hispanic people are 'out of control" when they are playing soccer. Yes they yell a lot in Spanish but it was no more than the other parents.

When I think of Hispanic youth soccer players, I think of those teams teams that often don't even enter the various travel programs in the area, but could easily defeat some of our top (mostly white) teams. Sorry for being racist - but not sure if I'm being racist against white players or Hispanic players - please advise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the original poster and no, i'm not racist. My mother is from Belize so please let that silly idea go. He yells at his kid in spanish so the refs doesn't hear him cursing. As for the college comment, it was more about his soccer IQ (slince he claims to have played) as opposed to his appearance.

I did just receive an email from the TD and he will be coming to a few of the games to observe. His son is actually a really nice kid and feel bad seeing him get verbally abused during the game, I assume the ride home is even worse. I just wanted to vent here, I'm going to invest in some BOSE headphones for the games!

Look, the only way his yelling in Spanish is at all relevant to your case is if he is cursing in Spanish and not in English because he feels he can get away with it. Other than that if he is yelling and being derogatory it doesn't matter what language and it is immaterial. Your making a point that he also yells in Spanish is a very passive aggressive racist rant. But, for all you know he could be yelling I love in Spanish.

So either you speak Spanish and you know what he is yelling in Spanish or you don't speak Spanish and he is yelling God knows what in a another language threatens you because you don't know what he is saying?

Not op, but can't you read, or are you so uneducated yourself that you think people can't recognize swearing in Spanish?

No, it doesn't matter if the parent is cursing in English, Spanish or Greek. Especially here, in this forum where the OP is just asking for advice on how to handle the situation. Again, the only part that is relevant is that he is ONLY cursing in Spanish because he thinks he can get away with it. Other than that, the language doesn't matter.

All the OP had to say is "We have a nutjob parent on the team who is yelling and cursing at the game. He hasn't been called out by the coach or refs because he curses exclusively in Spanish and they are unaware of what exactly he is saying."

Except OP's mother is from Belize, so OP does know what is being said in Spanish.

Except they don't speak Spanish in Belize...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He racist because he said the parent is yelling in Spanish?

Pointing out that he is yelling in Spanish only serves one purpose.

Right... pointing out that he is yelling in Spanish.

Pointing out that he is yelling would have sufficed. No need to detail his language or question whether he actually went to college. None of that matters aside from painting a picture of an uneducated Hispanic man.

These microagressions / triggers are why Trump won the White House. Stop labeling everything racist, the vast majority of people don't agree with the narrative, and only pushes the moderates further from the Center - and I'm a Democrat.

Here is the thing, racist or not it wasn't pertinent to the issue. But, the OP added it for a reason, why? The language spoken had no bearing on the appropriateness of the parent's actions. By saying that the parent was "screaming in English/Spanish" HE conflated the issue. Why did he bother to even mention it? And then followed up with the "he doesn't look like he went to college" comment, he attempted to paint a very derogatory picture of the father beyond just his sideline behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son played soccer on a mostly Hispanic team. People are very prejudice against Hispanic kids in soccer. We had so many issues with parents yelling at our parents and at our kids calling them names. Kids on the field would tell them to "go back to their country".

I had to get tournament officials involved on many occasions to control the way parents, kids and officials treated our team.

It's sad but true, that people think Hispanic people are 'out of control" when they are playing soccer. Yes they yell a lot in Spanish but it was no more than the other parents.

When I think of Hispanic youth soccer players, I think of those teams teams that often don't even enter the various travel programs in the area, but could easily defeat some of our top (mostly white) teams. Sorry for being racist - but not sure if I'm being racist against white players or Hispanic players - please advise.

I agree that many Hispanic families in this area can't afford the cost of travel soccer and they will demolish a white Bethesda/Potomac/etc team and play real soccer which includes body contact and then the white Bethesda people freak out, think they are fouling when they are not and call the kids names.

You are generalizing which is called an implicit bias. I am too, I am implicitly biased against rich white people because they call foul when their kids are beat at anything and need to blame the referee and dirty play.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your complaint would be a lot more credible if it weren't prefaced by a racist rant.

OH, get over yourself. OP's post contains helpful, although perhaps identifying, information.