My husband isn't doing his to-do list

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just hire someone.

You're busy, hence you split the property and household tasks.

You're not moneybags or like wasting money. Tell him to call three handyman for every task and go with the best price or value. Then he hires, schedules and is home to let in the handyman.

You think if he won't just fix the shit himself, he's going to take the initaitive to get a handyman? lol

[Anonymous]

Wow, lots of blaming going on here. OP just wants DH to act like an actual adult and do the work he agreed to do. I bet he gets his work done at his job without his boss having to take a freaking psychology class to figure out how to motivate his ass.

[Anonymous]

I can see getting BIL to help with the oven. Having him clean bugs out of your light fixtures is not time-sensitive. But I'd discuss with DH first.

[Anonymous]

I either do it myself or hire out. Enough of that bs. I've been married 20 years and I know it won't get done if I leave it to H. I've cried, pleaded, ignored it, mentioned it in counseling. He just doesn't care if the house isn't well maintained. Luckily we can afford to hire a lot of handyman type work out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I either do it myself or hire out. Enough of that bs. I've been married 20 years and I know it won't get done if I leave it to H. I've cried, pleaded, ignored it, mentioned it in counseling. He just doesn't care if the house isn't well maintained. Luckily we can afford to hire a lot of handyman type work out.

Yeah, unfortunately one partner usually cares a lot more than the other one. If you can afford to outsource, just do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Come over to my house where our main floor bathroom got clogged and leaked!
DH's response to not even knowing where it was leaking from is to get a replacement toilet. Shall see how many weeks that takes. I hope the nanny doesn't quit in the meantime, with no main floor toilet for her and the kids all day.....

Why don't you take care of it yourself? Why is it your husband's responsibility? In my household, my wife is generally better at repairs so she does most of them. I do most of the grocery shopping/cooking/cleaning. Maybe you are stuck in old gender roles that don't necessarily make sense anymore. This entire thread seems ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Yes, this thread teaches that "your bitch of a wife will assign you endless tasks, will never shut up about it, and will never be satisfied" which is enough to make any man stay single.

Exactly! Ask me how many "honey do" lists I have...

If you were a grown-ass man you'd do your share of family responsibilities without having to be asked.

[Anonymous]

Lucky for me I don't care deeply about things. If dh forgets to pick up an ingredient for dinner, he comes home to no dinner. Leaky kitchen sink? I refuse to use it and he comes to a pile of dishes and no dinner etc. I'm not mad, I just fix what I care about,,and so does he. He's got really good around the house and yard. He cares what others think about the yard etc, which i dont.

Only works coz of no kids in the house. It's my second marriage, I don't have energy to nag or pick up after another adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I either do it myself or hire out. Enough of that bs. I've been married 20 years and I know it won't get done if I leave it to H. I've cried, pleaded, ignored it, mentioned it in counseling. He just doesn't care if the house isn't well maintained. Luckily we can afford to hire a lot of handyman type work out.

Nice dynamic. He must be so thankful he married someone that does everything for him. That's attractive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Come over to my house where our main floor bathroom got clogged and leaked!
DH's response to not even knowing where it was leaking from is to get a replacement toilet. Shall see how many weeks that takes. I hope the nanny doesn't quit in the meantime, with no main floor toilet for her and the kids all day.....

Why don't you take care of it yourself? Why is it your husband's responsibility? In my household, my wife is generally better at repairs so she does most of them. I do most of the grocery shopping/cooking/cleaning. Maybe you are stuck in old gender roles that don't necessarily make sense anymore. This entire thread seems ridiculous.

My husband's MO on things is wait until wifey it nanny does it, do it halfassed, or argue about being asked to manage his property.

What a man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I either do it myself or hire out. Enough of that bs. I've been married 20 years and I know it won't get done if I leave it to H. I've cried, pleaded, ignored it, mentioned it in counseling. He just doesn't care if the house isn't well maintained. Luckily we can afford to hire a lot of handyman type work out.

Nice dynamic. He must be so thankful he married someone that does everything for him. That's attractive.

Yeah, except I'm screwing around on him because I resent the hell out of him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Yes, same situation here.
DH has untreated ADHD, and is forever procrastinating and late, especially for tasks he's not enthused about.
My goal is to get him treated for his ADHD.

News flash, dear: procrastinating on tasks he's not enthused about has nothing to do with ADHD.

This thread is just another reason to never get married.

Agree with this. When the bitching to blowjob ratio gets too high, motivation goes out the window.

You should be married to me. I give great bjs whenever and don't bitch. I just get 'er done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Yes, same situation here.
DH has untreated ADHD, and is forever procrastinating and late, especially for tasks he's not enthused about.
My goal is to get him treated for his ADHD.

News flash, dear: procrastinating on tasks he's not enthused about has nothing to do with ADHD.

This thread is just another reason to never get married.

Agree with this. When the bitching to blowjob ratio gets too high, motivation goes out the window.

You should be married to me. I give great bjs whenever and don't bitch. I just get 'er done.

Well, maybe your DH does his chores?

[Anonymous]

Op, do you want to fuck bil? Be honest

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Yes, same situation here.
DH has untreated ADHD, and is forever procrastinating and late, especially for tasks he's not enthused about.
My goal is to get him treated for his ADHD.

News flash, dear: procrastinating on tasks he's not enthused about has nothing to do with ADHD.

This thread is just another reason to never get married.

Agree with this. When the bitching to blowjob ratio gets too high, motivation goes out the window.

You should be married to me. I give great bjs whenever and don't bitch. I just get 'er done.

That's what I'm talking about. I'm not the most handy - for example I don't do complex electric and plumbing - but I do simple electrical, simple plumbing, landscape, built a garden with boxes and fenced off with nice rock in between the beds (which she was going to manage yet I weed and maintain it), built a full hole gym for us. I like doing stuff like that. Not going to lie though. When she's too busy with telling me what needs to be done and complaining about stuff and it surpasses the BJ ratio, my motivation dwindles to nothing.