He showed up drunk at my door -WWYD?

[Anonymous]

He's a tool. He's the guy that make other guys think women like assholes. Dump him, and find a nice guy to settle down with.

[Anonymous]

I sense you two are soulmates. Give him another chance. Even a baseball player gets three strikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I sense you two are soulmates. Give him another chance. Even a baseball player gets three strikes.

[Anonymous]

I would seriously think it over for awhile.

The drunk part wouldn't be so much of a deal-breaker as the part where the publicly put you down in such a shameful way in front of other people.

That was a really crappy thing to do you and was totally uncalled for.

To do that to you, to humiliate you in public + try to make you look so small in front of other people is a huge red flag OP and not something that should be swept under the rug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the drunken display the stuff of all the sweet romantic comedies? Maybe he got drunk because he had just been dumped for no reason. Not the most mature way to handle it, but how would youl like it if he dumped you because of a joke you made? So he made a joke that you found to be in poor taste. People do that. Why would you be embarrassed? Did you really think your friends would think it was true? OP I think you both have maturity issues--his for his frat-boy sense of humor and way of dealing and you with your emotional reactivity and honestly I think the bigger problem lies with you. Do you generally trash 6 months of relationship investment based on a single joke?

It wasn't a joke. It was a sarcastic insult - he implied that his woman was a slut. What is funny about that?

17:17 here ....+1

There was nothing funny about this and it wasn't a joke, either intended or as delivered.

I've been with DW for 34 yrs. and have never said anything like this in public ... nor in private.

Ex BF is an insecure, aggressive little twat. Leave him in the gutter where he belongs and someone else can try to deal with him if he ever grows up.

My grandmother is not a joking woman and would say that type of "joke" held some truth to the person saying it. Would ex-BF have found it equally as funny if in wide -eyed innocence you responded "you tell me, didn't you say that's how you got your job". As my grandmother would day that would have shut him up and I'm sure he would not have found it funny.

I would have left him on the doorstep. You are way too nice. Stay strong and don't take him back.

[Anonymous]

Guy here. This is why good guys always get last. We would never put down someone (who we care about) like that. Instead we would be branded as too soft and too good to be true. Yet the assholes like the OP's bf will always have women (including the OP) 2nd guessing their decision to break things off.

I should also say that even if the OP is inclined to think he was just joking and out of line, it still could mean both of you are not compatible because you have different senses of humor. The things some women are prepared to put up with.............

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, some people would laugh along and not be hurt, some people would be hurt. You're obviously the latter and should be with someone that you're on the same wavelength with. He sounds really immature and I agree is probably not comfortable with your success. My husband wouldn't have said this to me when we were 26, I can assure you.

Not know more about your relationship, I would recommend you end it now and move on. My DH has his flaws and yes we kid around (and did so when dating) but never so vulgar! Open your eyes... "inconsiderate", "possible alcoholic"..., sounds like he is very insecure in where his career is, his comment raises concern for me as to whether he would provide considerate, respectful support of your career for the long term. You are young. discuss your feelings with him and if you don't like the answer move on but don't end it without some mature discussion because you will always wonder "if I had". If you really listen to his responses you will be able to see what is best. Don't be afraid to move on you are still young and marriage is a lifetime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HELL NO.

He has demonstrated irresponsible, emotional, reactive behavior. Insulting you publicly, minimizing your feelings, not taking accountability, getting drunk past the point of self control. No matter your age some things are still applicable: Trust what people show you the first time.

You have no obligation here. Tell him no judgement, but you are not comfortable with a commitment anymore. And stand your ground. Be nice, but be firm.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the drunken display the stuff of all the sweet romantic comedies? Maybe he got drunk because he had just been dumped for no reason. Not the most mature way to handle it, but how would youl like it if he dumped you because of a joke you made? So he made a joke that you found to be in poor taste. People do that. Why would you be embarrassed? Did you really think your friends would think it was true? OP I think you both have maturity issues--his for his frat-boy sense of humor and way of dealing and you with your emotional reactivity and honestly I think the bigger problem lies with you. Do you generally trash 6 months of relationship investment based on a single joke?

It wasn't a joke. It was a sarcastic insult - he implied that his woman was a slut. What is funny about that?

17:17 here ....+1

There was nothing funny about this and it wasn't a joke, either intended or as delivered.

I've been with DW for 34 yrs. and have never said anything like this in public ... nor in private.

Ex BF is an insecure, aggressive little twat. Leave him in the gutter where he belongs and someone else can try to deal with him if he ever grows up.

My grandmother is not a joking woman and would say that type of "joke" held some truth to the person saying it. Would ex-BF have found it equally as funny if in wide -eyed innocence you responded "you tell me, didn't you say that's how you got your job". As my grandmother would day that would have shut him up and I'm sure he would not have found it funny.


^^^^yes his form of a joke was not funny. It was degrading and insulting. Don't be embarrassed as you do not control his mouth but do be embarrassed if you allow him to stick around. You are to young move on he is showing you his true colors...Look!

I would have left him on the doorstep. You are way too nice. Stay strong and don't take him back.

[Anonymous]

^^^^yes his form of a joke was not funny. It was degrading and insulting. Don't be embarrassed as you do not control his mouth but do be embarrassed if you allow him to stick around. You are to young move on he is showing you his true colors...Look!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the drunken display the stuff of all the sweet romantic comedies? Maybe he got drunk because he had just been dumped for no reason. Not the most mature way to handle it, but how would youl like it if he dumped you because of a joke you made? So he made a joke that you found to be in poor taste. People do that. Why would you be embarrassed? Did you really think your friends would think it was true? OP I think you both have maturity issues--his for his frat-boy sense of humor and way of dealing and you with your emotional reactivity and honestly I think the bigger problem lies with you. Do you generally trash 6 months of relationship investment based on a single joke?

It wasn't a joke. It was a sarcastic insult - he implied that his woman was a slut. What is funny about that?

17:17 here ....+1

There was nothing funny about this and it wasn't a joke, either intended or as delivered.

I've been with DW for 34 yrs. and have never said anything like this in public ... nor in private.

Ex BF is an insecure, aggressive little twat. Leave him in the gutter where he belongs and someone else can try to deal with him if he ever grows up.

My grandmother is not a joking woman and would say that type of "joke" held some truth to the person saying it. Would ex-BF have found it equally as funny if in wide -eyed innocence you responded "you tell me, didn't you say that's how you got your job". As my grandmother would day that would have shut him up and I'm sure he would not have found it funny.

I would have left him on the doorstep. You are way too nice. Stay strong and don't take him back.


I like your grandma!

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not. Your ex-boyfriend not only humiliated you in public, he also showed up at your house belligerent and drunk.

Do you want to be here on DCUM posting 5-10 years from now with a kid, #2 on the way about how your husband emotionally abuses you and stays out drunk and comes home mean while you take care of the kid?

I didn't think so. Snap out of it, but your adult goggles on and realize you just got a favor of seeing this loser for who he really is while there was still time to leave with no consequences.

Match your new job promotion (congrats!) with an upgrade in the romance department. You deserve it.

[Anonymous]

Loser

[Anonymous]

Nice of you to take care of him. I think I would have called his mother to come clean him up. Or maybe the paddy wagon!

[Anonymous]

Thank god not all women are this stupid.