Try to top my MIL story

[Anonymous]

How can I get my MIL to stay in a tent when she visits?

[Anonymous]

Just had my first child and my miL is a lactation consultant. She gave us a breastfeeding class and I thought - ok that's what LCs do and that's very nice. No. Cut to two hours after the birth my miL is mauling my tits and my child. She came home with us from the hospital and every two hours more tit mauling. I know it's to get milk to come down but really - hands the fuck off. The worst was the second day after birth I developed a severe infection and had to go to the ER. She came there to help with the baby. And, while I was sitting in a room in horrible excruciating pain, with someone vomiting in the next bed, mil came in with a breast pump which she insisted I use. And felt up my tits again for good measure. I cried through the entire thing. I havent let her near me since and refuse to discuss anytiing about my daughters care with her. Honestly, it's completely turned me
off to breastfeeding and I still feel so violated I don't want
to be around her. I'm still doing it Tho

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How can I get my MIL to stay in a tent when she visits?

This.

[Anonymous]

"They came out to "help" with number 2, and gave us a bill for $2,000 for their services and food they bought while staying with us (incidentally, they changed their 2 week visit to a 6 week visit without asking so they could get a better deal on plane tickets). DH negotiated them down to $500. "


WHAT? Does this include plane tickets? Are they charging you by the hour to watch their grandkids? I need more details!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just had my first child and my miL is a lactation consultant. She gave us a breastfeeding class and I thought - ok that's what LCs do and that's very nice. No. Cut to two hours after the birth my miL is mauling my tits and my child. She came home with us from the hospital and every two hours more tit mauling. I know it's to get milk to come down but really - hands the fuck off. The worst was the second day after birth I developed a severe infection and had to go to the ER. She came there to help with the baby. And, while I was sitting in a room in horrible excruciating pain, with someone vomiting in the next bed, mil came in with a breast pump which she insisted I use. And felt up my tits again for good measure. I cried through the entire thing. I havent let her near me since and refuse to discuss anytiing about my daughters care with her. Honestly, it's completely turned me
off to breastfeeding and I still feel so violated I don't want
to be around her. I'm still doing it Tho

LMAO! classic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just had my first child and my miL is a lactation consultant. She gave us a breastfeeding class and I thought - ok that's what LCs do and that's very nice. No. Cut to two hours after the birth my miL is mauling my tits and my child. She came home with us from the hospital and every two hours more tit mauling. I know it's to get milk to come down but really - hands the fuck off. The worst was the second day after birth I developed a severe infection and had to go to the ER. She came there to help with the baby. And, while I was sitting in a room in horrible excruciating pain, with someone vomiting in the next bed, mil came in with a breast pump which she insisted I use. And felt up my tits again for good measure. I cried through the entire thing. I havent let her near me since and refuse to discuss anytiing about my daughters care with her. Honestly, it's completely turned me
off to breastfeeding and I still feel so violated I don't want
to be around her. I'm still doing it Tho

This is so f'ing funny I have tears in my eyes. MIL sexual assult! I realize that for you it sucked. MY MIL came into my bedroom while I was nursing topless b/c I couldn't figure nursing out and I rushed to cover. She said, don't worry about it. I'm gonna see everything anyway. That's only her eyes and I felt it intrusive. at least now I know that it could have been worse...this exact story.

[Anonymous]

" And felt up my tits again for good measure."

this is the best line

[Anonymous]

Pp here- yeah, see I wish she would just cut my daughters hair or (hey hey) slept in a tent. I still shudder when I think about it. And what's worse is she always talks about nursing and asking about my supply and I want to scream at her to back off of my boobs!

[Anonymous]

Annoying for sure and she shouldn't have done it, but there are WAY worse MIL stories.

[Anonymous]

I don't know- having my body violated pretty much tops my list.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
They came out to "help" with number 2, and gave us a bill for $2,000 for their services and food they bought while staying with us (incidentally, they changed their 2 week visit to a 6 week visit without asking so they could get a better deal on plane tickets). DH negotiated them down to $500.

OMG, I am totally appalled for you.

I am also shocked for the mauled tits DIL. Yeah, nobody should be handling your body unless you want them to. I'm really sorry you had to deal with that.

Love the MIL story who chose to stay in a tent...and the one who called 911 for pacifier smothering. Thank you for the laughs, and for making me appreciate my MIL so much more!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just had my first child and my miL is a lactation consultant. She gave us a breastfeeding class and I thought - ok that's what LCs do and that's very nice. No. Cut to two hours after the birth my miL is mauling my tits and my child. She came home with us from the hospital and every two hours more tit mauling. I know it's to get milk to come down but really - hands the fuck off. The worst was the second day after birth I developed a severe infection and had to go to the ER. She came there to help with the baby. And, while I was sitting in a room in horrible excruciating pain, with someone vomiting in the next bed, mil came in with a breast pump which she insisted I use. And felt up my tits again for good measure. I cried through the entire thing. I havent let her near me since and refuse to discuss anytiing about my daughters care with her. Honestly, it's completely turned me
off to breastfeeding and I still feel so violated I don't want
to be around her. I'm still doing it Tho

this is funny, but i am also so sorry. it really sucks that you are feeling so violated (and are being so violated). is there a way to say look i really appreciate it your intentions and want to do everything i can to breastfeed, but given our relationship im feeling like it might be better to have a non family member LC? do you have any pals you can trade services with? it's akin to me to having an OB whose my FIL... good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just had my first child and my miL is a lactation consultant. She gave us a breastfeeding class and I thought - ok that's what LCs do and that's very nice. No. Cut to two hours after the birth my miL is mauling my tits and my child. She came home with us from the hospital and every two hours more tit mauling. I know it's to get milk to come down but really - hands the fuck off. The worst was the second day after birth I developed a severe infection and had to go to the ER. She came there to help with the baby. And, while I was sitting in a room in horrible excruciating pain, with someone vomiting in the next bed, mil came in with a breast pump which she insisted I use. And felt up my tits again for good measure. I cried through the entire thing. I havent let her near me since and refuse to discuss anytiing about my daughters care with her. Honestly, it's completely turned me
off to breastfeeding and I still feel so violated I don't want
to be around her. I'm still doing it Tho

Oh my god, that's so terrible, not just as a MIL but as a lactation consultant. I actually want to become a lactation consultant and am a HUGE breastfeeding advocate, but I remember so clearly my feelings as an expecting mom and being scared that somebody would bust into my room and do just that. I think it's just common sense that new moms are feeling vulnerable and need some space and do MUCH better with hands-off help if everything is going well, and hands-on help ONLY if mom asks for it. Unfortunately someone would be so pushy with ANYONE, let alone someone closely connected to you.

When my sister in law gave birth, I went to visit right away and she knows I am really into breastfeeding, etc. I was so careful not to push my opinion of it on her or to touch her in any way. She totally told me that she'd been having trouble and asked for my help. So I said, "do you want me to sit in while you nurse and see how everything looks?" When I thought she might have a shallow latch, I showed her how to cup the boob on MY breast. She showed me how red her nipples were and I thought I noticed that they were a little bit flat, and that's above my pay grade. I cannot imagine anyone mauling boobs!

And what do you mean to help the milk come down? Two hours after birth? Um, no! I can see her handling your breast (WITH YOUR PERMISSION) in order to help you learn how to massage extra colostrum out (which by the way, I don't personally think is all that necessary) but you don't just go there.

Maybe you should talk to your MIL. I am willing to bet that she was just trying very hard to help you and maybe her heart was in the right place but boy, what an epic fail! If you can bring yourself to do it, sit her down and tell her (a good time would be when she asks about supply) to please take off her professional hat and just be a grandmother. Tell her you felt upset by the way she didn't ask first before getting so physical and that it felt intrusive. And please tell her the truth, that the intrusiveness of it nearly undermined your nursing relationship with your daughter. Because of that, tell her, I'd like you to wait until I ask for your help in the future and let's talk about how cute the baby is, not my supply. Honestly, not only will you feel better getting this off your chest, but you'll seriously help her next victims I mean patients!!!

Thinking back to how guarded and completely vulnerable I felt about breastfeeding, something like that could have COMPLETELY derailed me, too. I'm glad you're still at it. Good work, mama!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted before about MIL suggesting the SIL's baby get my expressed breast milk and I give my kid formula for those instead so that way both babies get some breastmilk, afterall my baby did not really need only breastmilk and SIL was finding breastfeeding so difficult...... I cannot find the link

I remember this! Nutso!

[Anonymous]

My MIL story is not in the running for the top (tent one is hard to beat) but I'll share it anyway. When I was pregnant with my first, feeling huge, my FIL told me, with my tiny MIL smirking away next to him, that my MIL weighed the same when she left the hospital after having my DH as she did before she got pregnant. My MIL is a non-eater and a meal skipper and weighs about 100 lbs. I think legally she should be in a booster seat when she rides in a car.

They continue to tell me this same story EVERY TIME WE SEE THEM (2x/year). And, they always, always pull this when my husband elsewhere. This past summer they did it while we were eating in a restaurant and my DH had gone to the bathroom. Every time we're with them, even though/because I know its coming, I dread the moment. When my FIL delivers his line, I am amazed all over again that they did it again. I would be eternally grateful for a rejoinder that would put a stop to it, yet not blow up our relationship.

Actually they have a number of self-serving stories they tell over and over again, but this one bothers me the most for some reason. We go to the beach with them each summer, and hanging out on the beach with them is a misery since they like to sit there and discuss and analyze any overweight people/families they see. For this reason I now wear a bathing suit with a skirt halfway to my knees, otherwise I fear my MIL would get out binoculars to check my ass for cellulite.