SAHM with a second on the way. Need more help!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband took 2 days off. Barely remembered to pick me up from the hospital. Some of us had no help. And he is doctor.

This! Sometimes people’s situations don’t allow certain things for the time. This is a temporary situation for our family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would just put them in daycare.

Why? When I can afford to have them stay home with me AND have help. Weird!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a single mom who had no help. Three adults for two kids is overkill.

My part time nanny is only here for my son. I will be taking care of my newborn myself. I’m thinking of hiring extra help for house work. Did you even read?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband took 2 days off. Barely remembered to pick me up from the hospital. Some of us had no help. And he is doctor.

That's not the flex you think it is

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think people are intentionally being mean. But OP comes off as wealthy and a bit spoiled and most traditional SAHMs cannot relate. Many of us stayed home and had zero help on a regular basis so cannot relate to someone who already has a nanny for one child and is looking for more outsourcing as she adds a second.

Other than having someone occasionally help with the house work and covering for a medical appt, I don’t know why as a SAHM I would need so much assistance with my kids. But like the PPs, when I SAH when our kids were little they were my full time job and I was ok with that.

Because I want to have a life outside of medical appointments? We have worked hard to make a good life for our family, and that includes me, and that means having more leisure/personal time than just medical appointments even if I don’t “need” it to survive.

As a SAHM, I also need some adult pursuits. Volunteer projects, hobbies. Something besides kids 24/7. That means I need childcare.

We all know you don't volunteer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband took 2 days off. Barely remembered to pick me up from the hospital. Some of us had no help. And he is doctor.

That's not the flex you think it is

It's not. I can't wait to leave him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s a little odd to hire staff so you can do hobbies when you have a newborn and a toddler. But in any event, if as you said earlier what you want really is help with laundry, cleaning, cooking in the evenings, why not try laundry service, house cleaner (or pay them extra to add on laundry) and a meal delivery service - tons of options.

I never said I would be doing hobbies lol. I said I would hire extra help for house chores during the first 6-12 weeks of postpartum.

Yes the meal service and house cleaning/ laundry service is a great option. That could be less expensive than getting someone to do all three.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think people are intentionally being mean. But OP comes off as wealthy and a bit spoiled and most traditional SAHMs cannot relate. Many of us stayed home and had zero help on a regular basis so cannot relate to someone who already has a nanny for one child and is looking for more outsourcing as she adds a second.

Other than having someone occasionally help with the house work and covering for a medical appt, I don’t know why as a SAHM I would need so much assistance with my kids. But like the PPs, when I SAH when our kids were little they were my full time job and I was ok with that.

Because I want to have a life outside of medical appointments? We have worked hard to make a good life for our family, and that includes me, and that means having more leisure/personal time than just medical appointments even if I don’t “need” it to survive.

As a SAHM, I also need some adult pursuits. Volunteer projects, hobbies. Something besides kids 24/7. That means I need childcare.

We all know you don't volunteer.

This is OP. Someone else wrote that. I don’t volunteer right now you’re correct.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lol...or you could get a job if you are hiring that much help...

Why? I do love being with my toddler. Getting some morning help with him so I can run errands, have some time to myself and do some housework uninterrupted is a great thing.

How many errands can you possibly have to do?

Probably yoga, pilates, hair, nails.

I hope you understand how much all of this costs as compared to your spouse's income. I had a friend like this and it was all magical thinking.

[Anonymous]

Op, extra help is a great idea. You already give so much to your kids. Make sure you have some time for yourself.

Have you looked into how young boarding schools will accept kids? That sounds like a great option for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would just put them in daycare.

Why? When I can afford to have them stay home with me AND have help. Weird!

It sounds like you don't like them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband took 2 days off. Barely remembered to pick me up from the hospital. Some of us had no help. And he is doctor.

That's not the flex you think it is

It's not. I can't wait to leave him.

I bet so. He sounds awful!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need more help? Why?

I had four kids ages 5, 3, 21mo, & a newborn and didn’t need any help. I had my fifth when my eldest was 8, and still didn’t need any help, and I was working too.

How is that even possible? What attention were you giving your kids with working and taking care of four kids. I swear some of you exaggerate too much.

We both worked flexible jobs, and gave our kids the same attention SAHMs are able to give theirs. When our fifth was born our first was still 7 not 8, and Now our kids are 17, 16, 14, 12, & newly 10, thriving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lol...or you could get a job if you are hiring that much help...

Why? I do love being with my toddler. Getting some morning help with him so I can run errands, have some time to myself and do some housework uninterrupted is a great thing.

How many errands can you possibly have to do?

Probably yoga, pilates, hair, nails.

I hope you understand how much all of this costs as compared to your spouse's income. I had a friend like this and it was all magical thinking.

Yes I’ll have so much time to do these things while being the primary caretaker of my kids while we have no help from my husband at the moment or any family help 😆

[Anonymous]

Rich people problems. You can’t handle two kids at once? Pathetic.