DD dyed her hair pink and I’m not mad but am concerned

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Omg it's hair. I also come from a family and culture of "anything not "normal" is bad". I've tried super hard not to pass that to my kids and to accept them for who they are. My kid is 9 and we already talked about it and how it's ok to color hair and nails if she wants but let's make sure it's safe and what she wants before committing. Of all the body alterations to make it's the most temporary and easiest self expression to experiment with.

Nope, not nails, let's draw the line at harlot paint suffocating children's nail beds! Why mark your child for heathen life right on their fingers asking for all kinds of sin and corruption. Obesity, cat hoarding and church burning will not be far when they've been staring at their sullied cry for help nasty nails. Those idle hands must not be ironing out wide pilgrim labels enough if they're inhaling devil tinged fumes.

[Anonymous]

I am confused how she could do it without you knowing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am confused how she could do it without you knowing?

16 years olds can do all kinds of things without mom knowing, especially if they can drive.

[Anonymous]

She's a teenager OP, and hair dye isn't permanent. If she wants to rebel or be unique it's better than getting a piercing or a home done tattoo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD 16 dyed her hair pink. To be fair I never told her she couldn’t, but she went and did it. I don’t necessarily feel the need to punish her, it’s really not that big a deal, but I do find this worrying. Maybe I wouldn’t if it was just a streak or something but dyeing ALL your hair (which she did) is what I would deem a cry for help. However, she seems her normal cheerful self, but due to the hair choices I know that’s not the case. Or at least I suspect it’s not the case. I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t intervene? Thoughts?

TROLL POST. WAS ALREADY POSTED SOME MONTHS AGO THIS EXACT SCENARIO

Ah shoot - where is the original thread? If this is fake I’m mad I wasted brain space on it

[Anonymous]

Consider the making of a bad hair choice to be a rite of passage. Look at some high school yearbooks from the 80s and maybe you'll feel more assured.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you believe that dyeing your hair pink is a cry for help?

OP here. Yes I do. When I was growing up this was the conventionally accepted belief in that time and place. That dyeing your hair an unnatural color is a sign of deeper problems.

I know an engineer at my work who is pretty conventional but she thinks she's edgy.

During the pandemic when all the guys were growing beards and mustaches, she started dying the bottom 4 inches of her hair wild colors like pink and electric blue. She's an aerospace engineer married to another engineer. Most of her personality is about running, hiking, project cars, and cats. She got promoted and I think gave up the dyed hair then.

I also know a happy freshman who got a big college scholarship to dual major in a performing art and a science. She dyed her hair pink now. But I've seen her in a Disney Princess wig and ballgown at events for little kids.

I don't think it necessarily conveys mood. More whimsy and desire for bodily modification.

Much better than tattoos. Count your blessings.

[Anonymous]

What does your spouse have to say?

[Anonymous]

There is defintiely a connection between brightly dyed hair and frequent changes in hair color and poor mental health. If you go to a youth shelter - about 90% have brightly dyed hair. I think it is often a feeling of cotrolling something when life feels out of cotrol, of trying to establish some kind of identity, and wanting or needing attention / to be noticed.

I worked in youth mental health and saw a lot of blue and green and pink and purple hair. I also worked in a high school and the kids with the multi color hair were the kids who were struggling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am confused how she could do it without you knowing?

As someone who dyed my hair on high school, you can literally buy dye anywhere (I got it at Target) and it takes about 30 minutes in the bathroom. I did it when I was a teen and I'm not some kind of rebel. I just thought it would be fun to have purple hair. And it was fun, it faded pretty fast and ended up pretty reddish for a while.

The very nice college student who babysits my kids has had all sorts of different colors of hair and she's a normal accounting student who's engaged to her long term boyfriend (she's been our babysitter all four years).

[Anonymous]

Saddle up... Her next move is probably going to make you faint.

Ha!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you believe that dyeing your hair pink is a cry for help?

OP here. Yes I do. When I was growing up this was the conventionally accepted belief in that time and place. That dyeing your hair an unnatural color is a sign of deeper problems.

Is she grossly overweight? That’s the demographic I usually see the unnatural colored hair on. Maybe she wants to increase her self esteem so people will notice her?

Seriously, have you ever been to a middle school? What isolated country are people on this thread posting from?

I went to private middle school and this would not be tolerated. I have a kid in public middle school now and I’ve had another one in middle school not too long ago. We are in an upper middle class area, and I don’t see this often. I see it more in overweight, single cat ladies. Op has a right to be concerned.

Has Jd Vance entered the conversation? 'Overwwight, single cat ladies?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Saddle up... Her next move is probably going to make you faint.

Ha!

OP here. Sorry…what is the implication of this?

[Anonymous]

16 year old has time to do all these things? Man, HS is so easy.

Most kids this age I know are stressed about GPA, SAT, ECs, and future college applications etc.

[Anonymous]

I would be too op.