Is my boyfriend marriage material?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does everyone Gen Z and younger think the word wary is the same as the word weary? It used to be an occasional mixup but I can't remember the last time I saw someone even use the word wary, it's always weary and always incorrect. It's bizarre.

+1

It's right up there with loose/lose and the constant mix-up about advice/advise.

+1

And using when/whenever as if they were synonyms.

What about derailing threads with silly hung ups against Gen Z and grammar?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's on meds because you asked him to take them?

Then, no

He' was fine with his ADHD life sans meds before he met you.

After the honeymoon phase, he will go off the meds and blame you for making him take them

Who hurt you to make such generalized assumptions?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Some things about me:

Pros: solid career with good earnings, physically 7.5-8, good sense of humor, good at planning things, smart, own home, go to therapy when I need to

Cons: don’t want kids (this narrows my pool), I’m sometimes overly sensitive, I am not submissive, my family members are a mixed bag

If your really an 8 then I don’t think you are limited at all. I didn't catch your age, but if you consider slightly older men, you can snag a high earner whose kids are already grown. Then you are on easy street, as long as you keep him happy.

You'll be second fiddle to his kids and will end up as a nurse of an old man who broke his children's family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Some things about me:

Pros: solid career with good earnings, physically 7.5-8, good sense of humor, good at planning things, smart, own home, go to therapy when I need to

Cons: don’t want kids (this narrows my pool), I’m sometimes overly sensitive, I am not submissive, my family members are a mixed bag

So apparently you don't really think you have any cons or personality issues. You know perfectly well that not being submissive is not a thing, and that your family members are not reflective of you. Also that not wanting kids is fairly common these days.

So you lack self awareness or the ability to see what your less appealing traits are.

This^. OP lacks self awareness and empathy.

[Anonymous]

Since you don’t want kids there’s no need to rush into marriage. Give it another year and a half to see if you still feel the same way about him and the relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’m 31. Don’t want kids so no particular timeline, but do enjoy the companionship of a partner.

His messiness is very bad. I’m middle of the road on being tidy. I think I can live with this trait and just hire help if it comes to that.

Communication doesn’t help all the way with the adhd symptoms. He got on meds at my request which has improved things some, but it’s still a struggle with symptoms. He’s very inflexible.

Just no. If you hire cleaners he will freak because they move stuff to the wrong places.
Inflexible.

Don't marry. Of course he wants to marry an 8 with an income!
Maybe you will fall out of love with him.

Where did OP say that she is young, gorgeous, successful and wealthy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since you don’t want kids there’s no need to rush into marriage. Give it another year and a half to see if you still feel the same way about him and the relationship.

What if OP isn't young?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's on meds because you asked him to take them?

Then, no

He' was fine with his ADHD life sans meds before he met you.

After the honeymoon phase, he will go off the meds and blame you for making him take them

Who hurt you to make such generalized assumptions?

Did it hit, sweetie?

A man his age knows what he wants his life to be. He didn't choose to include ADHD meds in his life.

Making someone take meds they themselves didn't initiate on their own is a bad idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's wooing you right now so the sweetness comes naturally

Over the decades, you will be left with mostly the cons

Also, kids make this situation worse

Unless OP is a wealthy and accomplished supermodel, what is he wooing her for? We don't know what OP offers. We only know that she comes from a broken family.

She says she’s an 8 and makes enough bank to support herself. I’d woo that.

The BF knows he is dating way out of his league, so smartly trying to lock it down before she wakes up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since you don’t want kids there’s no need to rush into marriage. Give it another year and a half to see if you still feel the same way about him and the relationship.

What's the guarantee that he would hang out for a woman who doesn't love him enough to want to build a life with him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's on meds because you asked him to take them?

Then, no

He' was fine with his ADHD life sans meds before he met you.

After the honeymoon phase, he will go off the meds and blame you for making him take them

Who hurt you to make such generalized assumptions?

Did it hit, sweetie?

A man his age knows what he wants his life to be. He didn't choose to include ADHD meds in his life.

Making someone take meds they themselves didn't initiate on their own is a bad idea.

A lot of people aren't diagnosed until late in life and keep thinking of their ADHD related issues as personal flaws and failures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's on meds because you asked him to take them?

Then, no

He' was fine with his ADHD life sans meds before he met you.

After the honeymoon phase, he will go off the meds and blame you for making him take them

Who hurt you to make such generalized assumptions?

Did it hit, sweetie?

A man his age knows what he wants his life to be. He didn't choose to include ADHD meds in his life.

Making someone take meds they themselves didn't initiate on their own is a bad idea.

A lot of people aren't diagnosed until late in life and keep thinking of their ADHD related issues as personal flaws and failures.

That is for him to figure out

OP said she asked him to take meds

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's wooing you right now so the sweetness comes naturally

Over the decades, you will be left with mostly the cons

Also, kids make this situation worse

Unless OP is a wealthy and accomplished supermodel, what is he wooing her for? We don't know what OP offers. We only know that she comes from a broken family.

She says she’s an 8 and makes enough bank to support herself. I’d woo that.

The BF knows he is dating way out of his league, so smartly trying to lock it down before she wakes up.

If he is a clever gold digger trying to manipulate a naive young and gorgeous high earner then why are we even having this discussion? Run.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's on meds because you asked him to take them?

Then, no

He' was fine with his ADHD life sans meds before he met you.

After the honeymoon phase, he will go off the meds and blame you for making him take them

Who hurt you to make such generalized assumptions?

Did it hit, sweetie?

A man his age knows what he wants his life to be. He didn't choose to include ADHD meds in his life.

Making someone take meds they themselves didn't initiate on their own is a bad idea.

A lot of people aren't diagnosed until late in life and keep thinking of their ADHD related issues as personal flaws and failures.

That is for him to figure out

OP said she asked him to take meds

Any friend would advise another friend to seek medical advice if they feel it can help their friend. If two people who claim to be in love can't help each other then why label it as love?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's on meds because you asked him to take them?

Then, no

He' was fine with his ADHD life sans meds before he met you.

After the honeymoon phase, he will go off the meds and blame you for making him take them

Who hurt you to make such generalized assumptions?

Did it hit, sweetie?

A man his age knows what he wants his life to be. He didn't choose to include ADHD meds in his life.

Making someone take meds they themselves didn't initiate on their own is a bad idea.

A lot of people aren't diagnosed until late in life and keep thinking of their ADHD related issues as personal flaws and failures.

That is for him to figure out

OP said she asked him to take meds

Any friend would advise another friend to seek medical advice if they feel it can help their friend. If two people who claim to be in love can't help each other then why label it as love?

If she broke up with him, they would be nothing to each other just like all of our exes. That's the difference between friends and people you are dating.

She needs to marry who he is not who she crafted by requesting he take meds. If they broke up, would he still take the meds?