How to frame burnout when needing to cancel on friends?

[Anonymous]

I rarely want to do anything yet am happier when I do. If you are a similar spot, I'd suggest going. If they are truly good friends, you could even share that you're having a hard time and might not be able to stay as long as you normally would.

[Anonymous]

Good job re the FaceTime call, OP!

Yesterday I told a friend that I was really down - she responded “are you free for lunch or tea today? My treat!” I was so appreciative - but I’m extroverted and also she isn’t as far away.

[Anonymous]

My best friend has canceled on me repeatedly for the same reasons. What I like about her is that she's honest, which makes me trust her. I'm never afraid that she's ghosting me or whatever.

So tell them the truth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would invite them to your house to eat take out and hang out and tell them how much you are struggling. Let them support you. Invite them in instead of pushing them away. Drop the need to appear functional or impressive.

Best answer!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would invite them to your house to eat take out and hang out and tell them how much you are struggling. Let them support you. Invite them in instead of pushing them away. Drop the need to appear functional or impressive.

Best answer!

No it is not the best answer. Coddling is the worst thing you can do for someone with anxiety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:my friends completely understood and we're doing a FaceTime call while they're at the restaurant!

Please tell me you are kidding! This is one of the tackiest, rudest things one could do in a restaurant. How horrible to ruin the experience for other diners. Seems like selfishness is the defining characteristic here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:my friends completely understood and we're doing a FaceTime call while they're at the restaurant!

So they’re going to bother everyone around them at the restaurant?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:my friends completely understood and we're doing a FaceTime call while they're at the restaurant!

Please tell me you are kidding! This is one of the tackiest, rudest things one could do in a restaurant. How horrible to ruin the experience for other diners. Seems like selfishness is the defining characteristic here.

You seem like a confused and mean person. They're FaceTiming me from the car on the way in. Sorry for not being 1000 percent accurate. Seems like angry posting is YOUR defining characteristic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:my friends completely understood and we're doing a FaceTime call while they're at the restaurant!

So they’re going to bother everyone around them at the restaurant?

No, they're calling from the car on the way in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My best friend has canceled on me repeatedly for the same reasons. What I like about her is that she's honest, which makes me trust her. I'm never afraid that she's ghosting me or whatever.

So tell them the truth.

Truth in friendships is the defining feature of good ones. I am shocked by some of the responses here but clear why our society is burnt out.

[Anonymous]

You literally wrote " while at the restaurant." Nice way to change the goalposts.

[Anonymous]

1000 percent accurate? Sounds like you learned statistics from DJT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You literally wrote " while at the restaurant." Nice way to change the goalposts.

Why are you still posting? Why does this matter to you? "Nice way to change the goalposts"? Please, move on to something constructive that will make you happier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1000 percent accurate? Sounds like you learned statistics from DJT.

It's called hyperbole, used to effect in certain situations. This is an anonymous forum, not a CDC press conference.

[Anonymous]

I’d be too embarrassed to talk about anxiety.

Anxiety is either a real thing or the whole issue, it's all made up.