Do you make plans with your MIL or does your husband?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So glad I don’t have a son.

So glad I know what boundaries and basic manners are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How could you force him to call his mother back to reschedule? That means he is NOT in charge of scheduling events with his family--you are.

He should have divorced you when you insisted he schedule events with his family and then when he did, you forced him to change the schedule. You don't sound well.

What a joke you are lol divorcing for giving him his responsibilities? Are you for real, isn’t enough for us women to do everything in the house besides working and also we according to you also need to keep that men in good relationships with his own family haha what a joke

[Anonymous]

Why would I ever? She’s his problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just stop making plans. I told DH I'm responsible for plans with my side, he is responsible for his. Simple. His family blames me for him not making plans and ai look at him (in front of them) and say if Bob wanted to do that he would have arranged it - clearly he didn't want to.

This is dumb because logistically it is much better for one person to be the point person for all inter and intra family logistical planning. This avoids the two of you accidentally scheduling conflicting events. If you want him to be in charge of his family then what happens when he schedules thanksgiving and Christmas at his parents house and you scheduled one or both at your parents? Will you defer to his planning? Of course not you will over rule it and say he is a misogynist relic of the patriarchy.

The fact that it's not 50/50 as you were told it should be in feminism 101 just means that the people who come up with that stuff aren't actually responsible for making anything important happen.

Hahahahha, LOL. Sorry your son just isn’t that into you. -NP

[Anonymous]

Blood deals with blood. I deal with my family and he deals with his.

[Anonymous]

DH is the point of contact for his family and I’m the point for mine. We discuss plans and make choices from there. It’s a collaborative process because we both like being involved in the decision making for our family. Neither of us want the plans dictated by the other.

[Anonymous]

my husband manages his parents. I don't even speak to them.

[Anonymous]

My husband used to be the point person but he is a people pleaser and hates conflict so he gives in to ridiculous family demands out of guilt. We had too many times where he forgot to consult or tell me his Mom was coming for 12 days or his sister was staying in our vacation home during Covid for as long as she desired. When they started showing up unannounced and saying they didn’t have to ask to stay that I put my foot down, established boundaries, and requested to be involved in all communications regarding scheduling. Yes, I have a husband problem but I could see my sanity was contingent on taking over.

[Anonymous]

I plan all trips to see my in-laws. They're a plane ride away and if DH were in charge he'd book a connecting flight just to go to Florida and a rental car miles from the airport. It's better if I do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I plan all trips to see my in-laws. They're a plane ride away and if DH were in charge he'd book a connecting flight just to go to Florida and a rental car miles from the airport. It's better if I do it.

Sorry you married an idiot. That must be tough. Hope you’re not raising your boys to be willfully incompetent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I plan all trips to see my in-laws. They're a plane ride away and if DH were in charge he'd book a connecting flight just to go to Florida and a rental car miles from the airport. It's better if I do it.

Sorry you married an idiot. That must be tough. Hope you’re not raising your boys to be willfully incompetent.

Somehow I doubt he's an idiot. Sounds like weaponized incompetence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband. There have been times he hasn't cleared plans with me, which has meant either me re-arranging my unimportant plans at the last minute, or me forcing him to call his mother back because we did actually have prior commitments. So generally, he loops me in during the planning stage, so I can check my calendar.

But he doesn't have to clear plans with you. He is in charge of scheduling with his family and he scheduled it. You have to defer to his plans. If you don't defer to his plans that means you ARE in charge of scheduling events which include his family. So what is the point of him being involved at all? There is no point it is counter productive. You read something in a college feminist book or Ms. Magazine and just swallowed it with non critical thinking because actually thinking about things is not allowed.

Are you stupid? When I make plans with my parents, I double-check with my husband too, in case he wanted to do something at that time. It goes both ways. This has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with household operations.

Go to bed. Maybe your IQ will increase into the double digits for a short while.

🤣🤣🤣
Couldn’t agree more! Person is a moron!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I plan all trips to see my in-laws. They're a plane ride away and if DH were in charge he'd book a connecting flight just to go to Florida and a rental car miles from the airport. It's better if I do it.

Sorry you married an idiot. That must be tough. Hope you’re not raising your boys to be willfully incompetent.

Seriously. I hope he doesn’t have a job, if he can’t book a flight or rental car properly it sounds like he needs an aide just for basic life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I plan all trips to see my in-laws. They're a plane ride away and if DH were in charge he'd book a connecting flight just to go to Florida and a rental car miles from the airport. It's better if I do it.

Agree with PP. Either your DH is conveniently unable to manage travel plans or you prefer to make the plans and are pretending you HAVE to do it.

[Anonymous]

Husband has always been point on maintaining relationships with his side of the family. It never even occurred to me to take that on.