Bicycling Boyfriend

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most bikers I see have strong calves w/ bellies and noodle arms. Not sure that counts as "in shape."

Lazy, entitled DCUM harpie in the house

[Anonymous]

You need to get a life, hun. He has one. Stop worrying about his love for his hobby and find something you enjoy.

[H8Courtship]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been dating this guy for close to two years. Recently, rediscovered cycling and now goes out on rides four days a week, including about 2 hours each Saturday and Sunday. He’s up an out by 6 am and usually done by 10. It’s become a big part of his social life. He was new to the area when we met and didn’t know too many people. I am jealous a bit that he found a physical outlet he really likes, and wish I could also could find such a passion. I don’t know where I’m going with this. Is four hours on a weekend too much?

I assume you are both in your 20s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been dating this guy for close to two years. Recently, rediscovered cycling and now goes out on rides four days a week, including about 2 hours each Saturday and Sunday. He’s up an out by 6 am and usually done by 10. It’s become a big part of his social life. He was new to the area when we met and didn’t know too many people. I am jealous a bit that he found a physical outlet he really likes, and wish I could also could find such a passion. I don’t know where I’m going with this. Is four hours on a weekend too much?

Wife of a bike rider. It will increase. He will watch the weather and not make plans to do anything until his bike ride is set. When you have kids, you will be, for the most part, a bike widow. There’s a cult thinking re: bike riding and it tends to take over lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, is he one of those riders who wears the bicycling shirt and shorts? Riding is fine, but don't date him if he is. It always looks affected.

Ha. That always bothered me too. They’re dressed like they’re participating in a Tour De France competition. It would be like drivers of sports cars wearing helmets, gloves and putting decals all over their vehicles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is this different than going to the gym a few days a week?

+1 DH is not a cyclist (irrationally hates them, but that's another thread) but he's a runner, goes to the gym most days and does martial arts twice a week. Anyone who is serious about physical fitness is going to need several hours without their significant other carved out of the schedule, and the way OP's bf is structuring it costs her nothing. You could still go to brunch after he gets back!

Do you have kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been dating this guy for close to two years. Recently, rediscovered cycling and now goes out on rides four days a week, including about 2 hours each Saturday and Sunday. He’s up an out by 6 am and usually done by 10. It’s become a big part of his social life. He was new to the area when we met and didn’t know too many people. I am jealous a bit that he found a physical outlet he really likes, and wish I could also could find such a passion. I don’t know where I’m going with this. Is four hours on a weekend too much?

2 hours Sat/Sun, but 6am-10am is 4 hrs - 8 hrs a weekend.

So rarely take kids to soccer/baseball games on Sat morning (is he raring to do things with you after a 4 hour ride, or just, like home), and I assume never go to church or brunch with friends.

[Anonymous]

Every male cyclist I know divorced, and that was the best thing they ever did for their lonely, emotionally abused wives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a cyclist and my spouse is a golfer. A reasonable round of golf takes 4 hours. We are a good fit!

So you don't have kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, is he one of those riders who wears the bicycling shirt and shorts? Riding is fine, but don't date him if he is. It always looks affected.

What else is he supposed to wear?

Normal shorts and a t-shirt. You can bike in those, ya know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is this different than going to the gym a few days a week?

+1 DH is not a cyclist (irrationally hates them, but that's another thread) but he's a runner, goes to the gym most days and does martial arts twice a week. Anyone who is serious about physical fitness is going to need several hours without their significant other carved out of the schedule, and the way OP's bf is structuring it costs her nothing. You could still go to brunch after he gets back!

Do you have kids?

Yes, and he handles his 50%+. If he were a shirker he could certainly structure his workout time to shirk, but he isn't. And most of the posts on here from women married to shirkers don't have anything to do with sports, it's just an entitlement/sexism thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, is he one of those riders who wears the bicycling shirt and shorts? Riding is fine, but don't date him if he is. It always looks affected.

Ha. That always bothered me too. They’re dressed like they’re participating in a Tour De France competition. It would be like drivers of sports cars wearing helmets, gloves and putting decals all over their vehicles.

Yeah, everyone knows that exercise clothes aren't for exercising; they are for driving to the grocery store.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you want to bike with him?

I tried this weekend. I thought boyfriend was extra patient with me, but also felt he probably secretly resented me being slow and unstable.

But he was lovely, even when I was assaulting the bike in frustration.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been dating this guy for close to two years. Recently, rediscovered cycling and now goes out on rides four days a week, including about 2 hours each Saturday and Sunday. He’s up an out by 6 am and usually done by 10. It’s become a big part of his social life. He was new to the area when we met and didn’t know too many people. I am jealous a bit that he found a physical outlet he really likes, and wish I could also could find such a passion. I don’t know where I’m going with this. Is four hours on a weekend too much?

I assume you are both in your 20s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been dating this guy for close to two years. Recently, rediscovered cycling and now goes out on rides four days a week, including about 2 hours each Saturday and Sunday. He’s up an out by 6 am and usually done by 10. It’s become a big part of his social life. He was new to the area when we met and didn’t know too many people. I am jealous a bit that he found a physical outlet he really likes, and wish I could also could find such a passion. I don’t know where I’m going with this. Is four hours on a weekend too much?

Normal. 6-9 most normal