Has confronting the other woman ever gone well?

[Anonymous]

I am an OW. If I were confronted, I would say I'm sorry and I don't expect her forgiveness. She can tell my husband, but he already knows and knew from the beginning. I was intensely lonely in my own marriage and made a terrible mistake in a moment of weakness. He told me everything I wanted to hear and made me feel beautiful and alive again, and told me that his wife was not interested in him or his needs at all and that he was lonely too.

A mistake is using whole milk instead of nonfat, or forgetting to put the laundry from the washer into the dryer. You made a series of bad decisions. The justifications you offer don't really matter, which I think you know, but if you were truly remorseful and understood the pain you inflicted on others you would stop offering them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am an OW. If I were confronted, I would say I'm sorry and I don't expect her forgiveness. She can tell my husband, but he already knows and knew from the beginning. I was intensely lonely in my own marriage and made a terrible mistake in a moment of weakness. He told me everything I wanted to hear and made me feel beautiful and alive again, and told me that his wife was not interested in him or his needs at all and that he was lonely too.

An affair isn’t a single moment. It’s not one decision or a one night stand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I am an OW. If I were confronted, I would say I'm sorry and I don't expect her forgiveness. She can tell my husband, but he already knows and knew from the beginning. I was intensely lonely in my own marriage and made a terrible mistake in a moment of weakness. He told me everything I wanted to hear and made me feel beautiful and alive again, and told me that his wife was not interested in him or his needs at all and that he was lonely too.

A mistake is using whole milk instead of nonfat, or forgetting to put the laundry from the washer into the dryer. You made a series of bad decisions. The justifications you offer don't really matter, which I think you know, but if you were truly remorseful and understood the pain you inflicted on others you would stop offering them.

She’s a selfish t@@t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I am an OW. If I were confronted, I would say I'm sorry and I don't expect her forgiveness. She can tell my husband, but he already knows and knew from the beginning. I was intensely lonely in my own marriage and made a terrible mistake in a moment of weakness. He told me everything I wanted to hear and made me feel beautiful and alive again, and told me that his wife was not interested in him or his needs at all and that he was lonely too.

A mistake is using whole milk instead of nonfat, or forgetting to put the laundry from the washer into the dryer. You made a series of bad decisions. The justifications you offer don't really matter, which I think you know, but if you were truly remorseful and understood the pain you inflicted on others you would stop offering them.

I know it is bad/wrong/selfish/stupid/unforgivable. But I would show remorse if confronted.

[Anonymous]

I've never been an AP but if any BS ever confronted me, I'd shrug and tell her to ask her DH. Your marriage, your problem, lady. The fact that your DH doesn't respect you or your marriage doesn't have anything to do with me. Your husband is out there acting like a single man and that's no one's fault but his. ASK HIM.

[Anonymous]

From my perspective, it went very well. Of course, she tried to justify her behavior and explain how they were "in love," and just had this "powerful connection" that could not be denied. (*eye roll*) How stupid some women are. I told her I thought she was a whore and I still do.

15 years later and our marriage is stronger than ever. (Took a LOT of work!) She's still fully single and as ugly as ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is just wrong on so many levels it's not even worth getting into your ridiculous assumptions.

LOL. Either a married person is open to cheating or they aren't. Someone who is genuinely happy and content isn't going to cheat. No one is holding a gun to your husband's head to make him screw around behind your back.

Your marriage is already broken if your DH is having car sex with his assistant or booking a hotel room with one of your friends. No amount of mental gymnastics is going to change any of this, as hard as it may be for you to accept.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:From my perspective, it went very well. Of course, she tried to justify her behavior and explain how they were "in love," and just had this "powerful connection" that could not be denied. (*eye roll*) How stupid some women are. I told her I thought she was a whore and I still do.

15 years later and our marriage is stronger than ever. (Took a LOT of work!) She's still fully single and as ugly as ever.

I’m happy that your marriage is strong but the bitterness towards this person seems unhealthy. Like you haven’t actually fully healed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:From my perspective, it went very well. Of course, she tried to justify her behavior and explain how they were "in love," and just had this "powerful connection" that could not be denied. (*eye roll*) How stupid some women are. I told her I thought she was a whore and I still do.

15 years later and our marriage is stronger than ever. (Took a LOT of work!) She's still fully single and as ugly as ever.

Congrats, you're the stupid woman who is married to a cheater. I highly doubt that your marriage is "stronger than ever." Clearly, you're still not over it and never truly will be. I'm sure it's fun wondering where he really is when he's running late, or wondering if you should check all of his phone contacts. Fun times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am an OW. If I were confronted, I would say I'm sorry and I don't expect her forgiveness. She can tell my husband, but he already knows and knew from the beginning. I was intensely lonely in my own marriage and made a terrible mistake in a moment of weakness. He told me everything I wanted to hear and made me feel beautiful and alive again, and told me that his wife was not interested in him or his needs at all and that he was lonely too.

You sound like a complete and utter idiot or maybe a victim of abuse who has stunted development. Were you abused as a child?

[Anonymous]

It's amusing but also sad how desperate some women are just to be married that they stay with a cheater -- and then try to act like they've won something. Your cheater DH sucks but so do you...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is just wrong on so many levels it's not even worth getting into your ridiculous assumptions.

LOL. Either a married person is open to cheating or they aren't. Someone who is genuinely happy and content isn't going to cheat. No one is holding a gun to your husband's head to make him screw around behind your back.

Your marriage is already broken if your DH is having car sex with his assistant or booking a hotel room with one of your friends. No amount of mental gymnastics is going to change any of this, as hard as it may be for you to accept.

Lol yes men cheat even when they are in good happy marriages. They are just selfish.

The H is broken but the marriage wasn’t not really.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's amusing but also sad how desperate some women are just to be married that they stay with a cheater -- and then try to act like they've won something. Your cheater DH sucks but so do you...

Nobudy want to stay with a cheater, but the alternative ends up hurting kids.

So yea it sucks but the person they stays is just being unselfish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am an OW. If I were confronted, I would say I'm sorry and I don't expect her forgiveness. She can tell my husband, but he already knows and knew from the beginning. I was intensely lonely in my own marriage and made a terrible mistake in a moment of weakness. He told me everything I wanted to hear and made me feel beautiful and alive again, and told me that his wife was not interested in him or his needs at all and that he was lonely too.

You sound like a complete and utter idiot or maybe a victim of abuse who has stunted development. Were you abused as a child?

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is just wrong on so many levels it's not even worth getting into your ridiculous assumptions.

LOL. Either a married person is open to cheating or they aren't. Someone who is genuinely happy and content isn't going to cheat. No one is holding a gun to your husband's head to make him screw around behind your back.

Your marriage is already broken if your DH is having car sex with his assistant or booking a hotel room with one of your friends. No amount of mental gymnastics is going to change any of this, as hard as it may be for you to accept.

Lol yes men cheat even when they are in good happy marriages. They are just selfish.

The H is broken but the marriage wasn’t not really.

The marriage is made up of two people, husband and wife. So if the H is broken, so is the marriage.