Experienced Parents: What was DCUM right/wrong about?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got wrong and continues to get wrong:

the most competitive entry universities and LACs in the South are MAGA-havens full of ATV riders, the bimbos who love them and barely concealed Klan members. Maayybe some country club pro golfers who are secret Klan members.

In no particular order, I'm thinking thinking of Emory, Vanderbilt, Duke, Davidson, Rice, Florida.

UNC and Virginia always get a pass on this stereotyping, I assume because the NE->DC lawyers who proudly stereotype the entire South probably work alongside some UNC and UVA grads at their firms.

Aren't Duke and UNC in the same area?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not saving enough with the justification of being in a good school district and relying on merit or financial aid and being disappointed when its not what you deem enough.

Realism is sometimes hard to come by on this board. College and college prices have changed so much over the last 30 years that some are totally disoriented when they understand the current landscape. For some, that updated understanding occurs only as their kids are applying for college. That’s where state schools can be helpful, but some people don’t want to be bound by those options.

It is so irresponsible. This is nothing someone should be surprised by when your kid is a senior. Our financial advisor told us 20 years ago to save roughly $350k-$400k for each of our kids for private colleges and $200k for public college.

You advisor is absurd. You don't need $200K for public. You do the prepaid, like we did and then save for room/board/graduate school. You tell your kids that they are going to a state school as that is what you can afford.

UVA is over $42K/year for in-state. So the $50K/year is not that far off.

That's absurd for a state school. So, your kid goes to a different state school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got right: being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

+1
Talent and hard work in athletics and in the classroom can really pay off!

What do people do with kids who are not talented athletes?

Get them started with a sport they enjoy when they are young. You don’t need to be a natural athlete. It can be learned.

Yes, any kid can learn a sport and get better. But, if your goal is for your kid to be recruited, that’s another matter. Many parents waste 10s of thousands of dollars and tons of time trying to turn their mediocre athlete into a recruitment star. It overwhelmingly doesn’t work. If your kid loves their sport, they get playing time, and they excel relative to others in the game, you may have something. Otherwise, put your money in a 529.

Point taken. My kid is a recruited athlete at a high academic D3. Good but not great athlete. We spend less than 5k per year. Grades and stats in the top 25% of applicants in a school that accepts less than 7%. The investment in the sport was well worth it.

But that is basically a needle in a haystack. One DC played club for years and opted not to pursue recruiting in college. Only 3 kids got scholarships. Two were generous, one knocked down the price and the remainder covered by EFC and need. The other three are playing but minimal money - in that group, all probably measure up with your DC.

One kid really expected to get a scholarship AT ANY SCHOOL and it simply didn't pan out. Kid was super fast, quite talented, not always the best team player, and on the very small side for even a D3 school. Parents were devastated.

Finally, how are you paying less than 5k at a high academic D3 as D3s do not offer athletic scholarships? Perhaps your DC got a robust aid package, even merit, but not an athletic scholarship.

It's 5k per year spent on the sport during middle school and high school. None of this is for scholarship money. We will be full pay at the D3 which only offers need based aid. Without the sport, admission would have been a total crap shoot even with top stats. That's why being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got right: being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

+1
Talent and hard work in athletics and in the classroom can really pay off!

What do people do with kids who are not talented athletes?

Get them started with a sport they enjoy when they are young. You don’t need to be a natural athlete. It can be learned.

Yes, any kid can learn a sport and get better. But, if your goal is for your kid to be recruited, that’s another matter. Many parents waste 10s of thousands of dollars and tons of time trying to turn their mediocre athlete into a recruitment star. It overwhelmingly doesn’t work. If your kid loves their sport, they get playing time, and they excel relative to others in the game, you may have something. Otherwise, put your money in a 529.

Point taken. My kid is a recruited athlete at a high academic D3. Good but not great athlete. We spend less than 5k per year. Grades and stats in the top 25% of applicants in a school that accepts less than 7%. The investment in the sport was well worth it.

But that is basically a needle in a haystack. One DC played club for years and opted not to pursue recruiting in college. Only 3 kids got scholarships. Two were generous, one knocked down the price and the remainder covered by EFC and need. The other three are playing but minimal money - in that group, all probably measure up with your DC.

One kid really expected to get a scholarship AT ANY SCHOOL and it simply didn't pan out. Kid was super fast, quite talented, not always the best team player, and on the very small side for even a D3 school. Parents were devastated.

Finally, how are you paying less than 5k at a high academic D3 as D3s do not offer athletic scholarships? Perhaps your DC got a robust aid package, even merit, but not an athletic scholarship.

The poster meant they spent 5K per year on their kids youth sport as if that is a bargain. That is so DCUM bubble. The vast majority of us families do not have 5K available for youth sports for each child every year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got right: being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

+1
Talent and hard work in athletics and in the classroom can really pay off!

What do people do with kids who are not talented athletes?

Get them started with a sport they enjoy when they are young. You don’t need to be a natural athlete. It can be learned.

Yes, any kid can learn a sport and get better. But, if your goal is for your kid to be recruited, that’s another matter. Many parents waste 10s of thousands of dollars and tons of time trying to turn their mediocre athlete into a recruitment star. It overwhelmingly doesn’t work. If your kid loves their sport, they get playing time, and they excel relative to others in the game, you may have something. Otherwise, put your money in a 529.

Point taken. My kid is a recruited athlete at a high academic D3. Good but not great athlete. We spend less than 5k per year. Grades and stats in the top 25% of applicants in a school that accepts less than 7%. The investment in the sport was well worth it.

But that is basically a needle in a haystack. One DC played club for years and opted not to pursue recruiting in college. Only 3 kids got scholarships. Two were generous, one knocked down the price and the remainder covered by EFC and need. The other three are playing but minimal money - in that group, all probably measure up with your DC.

One kid really expected to get a scholarship AT ANY SCHOOL and it simply didn't pan out. Kid was super fast, quite talented, not always the best team player, and on the very small side for even a D3 school. Parents were devastated.

Finally, how are you paying less than 5k at a high academic D3 as D3s do not offer athletic scholarships? Perhaps your DC got a robust aid package, even merit, but not an athletic scholarship.

The poster meant they spent 5K per year on their kids youth sport as if that is a bargain. That is so DCUM bubble. The vast majority of us families do not have 5K available for youth sports for each child every year.

We do sports and music. We don't do it for college but to support our child's interests and exercise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got right: being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

+1
Talent and hard work in athletics and in the classroom can really pay off!

What do people do with kids who are not talented athletes?

Get them started with a sport they enjoy when they are young. You don’t need to be a natural athlete. It can be learned.

Yes, any kid can learn a sport and get better. But, if your goal is for your kid to be recruited, that’s another matter. Many parents waste 10s of thousands of dollars and tons of time trying to turn their mediocre athlete into a recruitment star. It overwhelmingly doesn’t work. If your kid loves their sport, they get playing time, and they excel relative to others in the game, you may have something. Otherwise, put your money in a 529.

Point taken. My kid is a recruited athlete at a high academic D3. Good but not great athlete. We spend less than 5k per year. Grades and stats in the top 25% of applicants in a school that accepts less than 7%. The investment in the sport was well worth it.

But that is basically a needle in a haystack. One DC played club for years and opted not to pursue recruiting in college. Only 3 kids got scholarships. Two were generous, one knocked down the price and the remainder covered by EFC and need. The other three are playing but minimal money - in that group, all probably measure up with your DC.

One kid really expected to get a scholarship AT ANY SCHOOL and it simply didn't pan out. Kid was super fast, quite talented, not always the best team player, and on the very small side for even a D3 school. Parents were devastated.

Finally, how are you paying less than 5k at a high academic D3 as D3s do not offer athletic scholarships? Perhaps your DC got a robust aid package, even merit, but not an athletic scholarship.

The poster meant they spent 5K per year on their kids youth sport as if that is a bargain. That is so DCUM bubble. The vast majority of us families do not have 5K available for youth sports for each child every year.

We do sports and music. We don't do it for college but to support our child's interests and exercise.

Sure. Lots of affluent families invest in all manner of educational opportunities before their kids. This type of support is not available to less affluent kids. It what it is....the American way. And it is a big advantage in college admissions to kids that could afford to develop their talents

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not saving enough with the justification of being in a good school district and relying on merit or financial aid and being disappointed when its not what you deem enough.

Realism is sometimes hard to come by on this board. College and college prices have changed so much over the last 30 years that some are totally disoriented when they understand the current landscape. For some, that updated understanding occurs only as their kids are applying for college. That’s where state schools can be helpful, but some people don’t want to be bound by those options.

It is so irresponsible. This is nothing someone should be surprised by when your kid is a senior. Our financial advisor told us 20 years ago to save roughly $350k-$400k for each of our kids for private colleges and $200k for public college.

Legitimate question: Should we all be fully bankrolling college (and even grad school)? Note that many loan options are primarily student loans (rather than parent plus).
Do some of you still expect your kids to contribute? We can afford it but are still planning on a contribution based on actual earnings or volunteer time (not requiring actual external student loans).

DP. Parents bankroll undergrad with the possible exception of taking the federal loans in the student's name.

We are paying all of undergrad. My kids fully understand this is a gift. One is doing STEM grad school and will not have to pay. The other wants to go to law school. It’s a ways off (she is a HS senior now) so we will decide when we get there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got right: being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

+1
Talent and hard work in athletics and in the classroom can really pay off!

What do people do with kids who are not talented athletes?

Get them started with a sport they enjoy when they are young. You don’t need to be a natural athlete. It can be learned.

Yes, any kid can learn a sport and get better. But, if your goal is for your kid to be recruited, that’s another matter. Many parents waste 10s of thousands of dollars and tons of time trying to turn their mediocre athlete into a recruitment star. It overwhelmingly doesn’t work. If your kid loves their sport, they get playing time, and they excel relative to others in the game, you may have something. Otherwise, put your money in a 529.

Point taken. My kid is a recruited athlete at a high academic D3. Good but not great athlete. We spend less than 5k per year. Grades and stats in the top 25% of applicants in a school that accepts less than 7%. The investment in the sport was well worth it.

But that is basically a needle in a haystack. One DC played club for years and opted not to pursue recruiting in college. Only 3 kids got scholarships. Two were generous, one knocked down the price and the remainder covered by EFC and need. The other three are playing but minimal money - in that group, all probably measure up with your DC.

One kid really expected to get a scholarship AT ANY SCHOOL and it simply didn't pan out. Kid was super fast, quite talented, not always the best team player, and on the very small side for even a D3 school. Parents were devastated.

Finally, how are you paying less than 5k at a high academic D3 as D3s do not offer athletic scholarships? Perhaps your DC got a robust aid package, even merit, but not an athletic scholarship.

The poster meant they spent 5K per year on their kids youth sport as if that is a bargain. That is so DCUM bubble. The vast majority of us families do not have 5K available for youth sports for each child every year.

I never said it was a bargain. But it is the best hook.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got right: being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

+1
Talent and hard work in athletics and in the classroom can really pay off!

What do people do with kids who are not talented athletes?

Get them started with a sport they enjoy when they are young. You don’t need to be a natural athlete. It can be learned.

Ha! Just make sure if you are looking for sports scholarships that you pick a sport with a lot of teams at a lot of schools and not one that has fewer than 100 schools with less than 15 per team. Look at sports like soccer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What DCUM got right: being a recruited athlete is the best hook.

+1
Talent and hard work in athletics and in the classroom can really pay off!

What do people do with kids who are not talented athletes?

Get them started with a sport they enjoy when they are young. You don’t need to be a natural athlete. It can be learned.

Ha! Just make sure if you are looking for sports scholarships that you pick a sport with a lot of teams at a lot of schools and not one that has fewer than 100 schools with less than 15 per team. Look at sports like soccer.

LOL soccer waste total waste. Lax too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not saving enough with the justification of being in a good school district and relying on merit or financial aid and being disappointed when its not what you deem enough.

Realism is sometimes hard to come by on this board. College and college prices have changed so much over the last 30 years that some are totally disoriented when they understand the current landscape. For some, that updated understanding occurs only as their kids are applying for college. That’s where state schools can be helpful, but some people don’t want to be bound by those options.

It is so irresponsible. This is nothing someone should be surprised by when your kid is a senior. Our financial advisor told us 20 years ago to save roughly $350k-$400k for each of our kids for private colleges and $200k for public college.

Ummm...not everyone has a financial advisor.

A simple google search for a college cost calculator 20 years ago would have given anyone similar information.

We did this 21 years ago (oldest is a Senior now) and calculator recommended 1,000-1,500 per month, per kid. That was not financially possible at the time. Knowing is different than being able to afford it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not saving enough with the justification of being in a good school district and relying on merit or financial aid and being disappointed when its not what you deem enough.

Curious, what is enough?

DP. Depends on your goal. Four years community college? 2/2 CC/state U? Private? Live at home or on campus? Top 30 vs. Top 100? College budgets vary a lot. One could go to George Mason, live at home, and work part-time to help pay tuition. Savings required? Minimal.

Not true anymore. Freshman are required to live on campus unless you get a waiver. Our costs to have DD live on campus and tuition, etc. was $43,000 a year, Other sites say less, like $30K. We received no aid whatsoever. https://www.collegesimply.com/colleges/virginia/george-mason-university/price/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not saving enough with the justification of being in a good school district and relying on merit or financial aid and being disappointed when its not what you deem enough.

Realism is sometimes hard to come by on this board. College and college prices have changed so much over the last 30 years that some are totally disoriented when they understand the current landscape. For some, that updated understanding occurs only as their kids are applying for college. That’s where state schools can be helpful, but some people don’t want to be bound by those options.

It is so irresponsible. This is nothing someone should be surprised by when your kid is a senior. Our financial advisor told us 20 years ago to save roughly $350k-$400k for each of our kids for private colleges and $200k for public college.

You advisor is absurd. You don't need $200K for public. You do the prepaid, like we did and then save for room/board/graduate school. You tell your kids that they are going to a state school as that is what you can afford.

UVA is over $42K/year for in-state. So the $50K/year is not that far off.

That's absurd for a state school. So, your kid goes to a different state school.

It is $30k all in for A&S. $10k more for engineering and Mcintire (last two years), the business school. Also, don’t forget that travel costs are nil compared to many other schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not saving enough with the justification of being in a good school district and relying on merit or financial aid and being disappointed when its not what you deem enough.

Realism is sometimes hard to come by on this board. College and college prices have changed so much over the last 30 years that some are totally disoriented when they understand the current landscape. For some, that updated understanding occurs only as their kids are applying for college. That’s where state schools can be helpful, but some people don’t want to be bound by those options.

It is so irresponsible. This is nothing someone should be surprised by when your kid is a senior. Our financial advisor told us 20 years ago to save roughly $350k-$400k for each of our kids for private colleges and $200k for public college.

You advisor is absurd. You don't need $200K for public. You do the prepaid, like we did and then save for room/board/graduate school. You tell your kids that they are going to a state school as that is what you can afford.

Most parents have no idea when their children are small where their children will want to go to college. hence, prepaid doesn't work for most families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not saving enough with the justification of being in a good school district and relying on merit or financial aid and being disappointed when its not what you deem enough.

Realism is sometimes hard to come by on this board. College and college prices have changed so much over the last 30 years that some are totally disoriented when they understand the current landscape. For some, that updated understanding occurs only as their kids are applying for college. That’s where state schools can be helpful, but some people don’t want to be bound by those options.

It is so irresponsible. This is nothing someone should be surprised by when your kid is a senior. Our financial advisor told us 20 years ago to save roughly $350k-$400k for each of our kids for private colleges and $200k for public college.

You advisor is absurd. You don't need $200K for public. You do the prepaid, like we did and then save for room/board/graduate school. You tell your kids that they are going to a state school as that is what you can afford.

UVA is over $42K/year for in-state. So the $50K/year is not that far off.

That's absurd for a state school. So, your kid goes to a different state school.

William & Mary is even more for in-state.