Redshirting August boy?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Again, a fool. You don’t know anything about anything and yet you spout off.

Furthermore, maturity issues and therapy issue are not in the same ballpark.

You do you though and I will make sure my kid is nice to yours. I am sure your dogmatic foolishness has landed them well!

It's sad you cannot have a conversation without name calling. You aren't someone I'd want mine to be around given how you treat people. I feel bad for your kid they had to spend an extra year at home with you.

DP. The cognitive dissonance between the bolded two sentences is an absurdist work of art. DCUM entertainment gold.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:By 7th grade being the youngest and smallest really sucks and erodes at your confidence as you get picked last in PE, always make the B team for sports and hit puberty way later than most of the other boys in your grade. Not to mention maturity as it comes to social dynamics of being less mature.

You may think your kid is a genius now and should head over to K so as to not be ‘bored’ in PK but really, it’s PK and it’s all fleeting.

you need to play the long game here. Any academic advanced traits in reading or math even out by 4-5th grade so rushing the process really gets you nothing.

Your kid will thank you. The social aspect of not being the baby in the grade is so key once he gets older.

Plus you get a whole extra year with him before college which is hard to imagine right now but which you will be SOO grateful for as a mama once your kids start to grow up. The extra year is such a gift…

No regrets from this mama whose September birthday kid is the seventh oldest in his grade (lots of August birthdays)

I want my kid to go through age appropriate norms. Holding them back so I can have an extra year makes it about me not them. I’d rather convince them to go to college where we can visit regularly.

You must have very young kids to call yourself mama.

By the time they get through high school I’m tired. I’m ready. Especially with all the activity and school driving. You set them up to be successful as best you can, continue to support them and allow them to grow up and have age appropriate life experiences.

Good for you? We are not all you and make our own decisions accordingly. Not everyone is a parent to an only child either. If you held back your oldest or middles and not the youngest nothing really changes and you won't magically have more energy at the end of it all. The nest empties at the same time.

[Anonymous]

Redshirting is dumb.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Exactly... not sure how this isn't obvious to parents. If you compare your kid to the ones who are actually the same age in the grade above I doubt they would still appear to be so mature or on track.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:By 7th grade being the youngest and smallest really sucks and erodes at your confidence as you get picked last in PE, always make the B team for sports and hit puberty way later than most of the other boys in your grade. Not to mention maturity as it comes to social dynamics of being less mature.

You may think your kid is a genius now and should head over to K so as to not be ‘bored’ in PK but really, it’s PK and it’s all fleeting.

you need to play the long game here. Any academic advanced traits in reading or math even out by 4-5th grade so rushing the process really gets you nothing.

Your kid will thank you. The social aspect of not being the baby in the grade is so key once he gets older.

Plus you get a whole extra year with him before college which is hard to imagine right now but which you will be SOO grateful for as a mama once your kids start to grow up. The extra year is such a gift…

No regrets from this mama whose September birthday kid is the seventh oldest in his grade (lots of August birthdays)

Some kids are just not athletic so size for them will not make any difference. The sport my child does goes by age not grade so to hold back for sports makes no sense nor to base it on a 13 year old.

Mine has no issue being the youngest.

It doesn't matter if sports are by age group. A kid born in August or September (depending on the school cutoff) is at a disadvantage in sports too. If you look at many sports, the players on top youth teams tend to be born in January/February/March. I have kids involved in soccer, and up until around U15-16, the vast majority of kids on the top teams are the oldest, and most B-team kids are fall birthdays. If a kid has other developmental factors that make you question whether to start on time, redshirting can sometimes align your kid with peers so that they are in the same grade as kids on their team. Not all young and small kids need to stay back, but if you have a very small boy who is immature and has trouble focusing, that extra year can help with confidence, especially in middle school.

I didn't redshirt my 2nd percentile in size and weight son with ADHD and a late August birthday. He is now a senior in high school. He is doing fine, but he is still a bit more immature than his peers. Middle school was terrible for him, especially due to his size. He would have been one of the smallest even if we had redshirted him, but I'll always wonder whether he would have been a more confident student if we had held him back.

Another bad thing about August birthdays is that most kids in the grade will have their drivers' licenses before your kid does. That pretty much rules out any driving themselves to activities or jobs until the summer after junior year (at least in Maryland).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Redshirting is dumb.

I agree, because the ultimate goal of redshirting is to make sure that your kid is not the youngest in the grade - but that automatically means someone else has to be the youngest. However it seems like redshirting is pretty common and encouraged for private schools so it’s probably fine for OP.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

Obviously the schools see a reason to be flexible with summer birthdays. Less so with spring birthdays. Again, take it up with your school if you have an issue. It’s not the parents fault that you think there should be some hard and fast rule with no flexibility. Obviously schools disagree.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Exactly... not sure how this isn't obvious to parents. If you compare your kid to the ones who are actually the same age in the grade above I doubt they would still appear to be so mature or on track.

What is a same age peer? Only one that is older than you?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

Obviously the schools see a reason to be flexible with summer birthdays. Less so with spring birthdays. Again, take it up with your school if you have an issue. It’s not the parents fault that you think there should be some hard and fast rule with no flexibility. Obviously schools disagree.

Because schools have the same misguided motivation as the redshirting parents. They think the schools look more successful--with 'smarter' kids and 'better' athletes--when their students are older.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

Obviously the schools see a reason to be flexible with summer birthdays. Less so with spring birthdays. Again, take it up with your school if you have an issue. It’s not the parents fault that you think there should be some hard and fast rule with no flexibility. Obviously schools disagree.

Because schools have the same misguided motivation as the redshirting parents. They think the schools look more successful--with 'smarter' kids and 'better' athletes--when their students are older.

If only they had you to guide them and show them the light. But, truth is, nobody cares what you think.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

Obviously the schools see a reason to be flexible with summer birthdays. Less so with spring birthdays. Again, take it up with your school if you have an issue. It’s not the parents fault that you think there should be some hard and fast rule with no flexibility. Obviously schools disagree.

Because schools have the same misguided motivation as the redshirting parents. They think the schools look more successful--with 'smarter' kids and 'better' athletes--when their students are older.

So don’t send your kids to the private school that practices redshirting. Problem solved.

Do you always shake your fist wildly against the sky when there are practical solutions that could make your life much better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

NP. I feel like if 12 months solves the problem, he can do it at grade level. That makes it so he isn't off grade level the rest of his school career, needlessly, since this sounds like a temporary, 12-month problem. So what if he has a tough K, 1st, or 2nd grade year? At least he is working "up."

I have a September boy (who would be 17 all through his senior year, many years into future). He is in the lowest group in his class for in reading. But he's very smart and competitive, so he's working hard to keep up with kids who are nearly a year, or more than a year (redshirted) ahead of him, and making big gains.

I am very anti-redshirt overall, but I could see myself doing it much later if it makes sense for sports and if he wants it. My child is athletic and will grow up very tall and strong, so an extra year might truly make a difference in physical growth, and depending on the school and cutoffs, he might actually be too young for his grade by high school (if we went private). So, imagining he has potential to be a college athlete, then I'd look at it. But not while he's a little elementary schooler. He deserves to be where school system says he should be, and I can't really think of any circumstance why any child shouldn't be. Their brains are ready, behavior may vary.

The bolded is peak DCUM anti-redshirter. “I know better than the rest of you and if you redshirt you are wrong wrong wrong and I definitely know better what to do with your kids than you do, but if I want to redshirt my kid, it’s a good idea and totally fine and obvs the right thing to do.”

Classic. Yet more good old-fashioned hypocrisy from DCUM anti-redshirters shamelessly displayed for the rest of us to gawk at.

“Redshirting for me but not for thee.”

Typical anti-redshirter.

[Anonymous]

OMG just let everyone redshirt!

Let everyone stay at the grade until the birthday that currently marks the upper boundary

K- 7
1st grade- 8
*
*
12 grade- 19