Working Moms: Do you HAVE to or WANT to?

[Anonymous]

Out of all of my friends, I can think of just one who works only because she truly wants to. Most SAH and the rest work because they need the paycheck. Surely there are some women who enjoy working, right?

I don't fall clearly into either category. I work to pay for extras that we could easily do without and because it gives me security knowing that if something ever happened to DH or his job, we'd be okay. I really don't like working, however, if I were to quit, it would be highly unlikely that I'd ever find another job with the same great hours, pay & benefits. I often wish I'd get laid off, so I could SAH without feeling guilty for quitting a good job.

And please, let's not start the SAHM vs. WM debate again! Both camps make tough choices and sacrifices.

[Anonymous]

I want to. I love what I do. We also need two incomes to live the way we want to live.

[Anonymous]

I work (part-time) because I want to, but I find myself wanting to less and less.

[Anonymous]

I want to and need to. I'm a better mom for it.

[Anonymous]

I want to work. Honestly, I find it pretty boring being at home all day with the children. I like the challenges and mental stimulation work provides, as well as the communication with people that does not entail thinking about naps, food, play activities etc. I admire women who want to be at home with their children, but it's just not me.

[Anonymous]

I work part time (no more than 10 hours a week freelance while my baby naps, after bed, before he gets up, etc), so I don't really consider myself a working mom. But, I will say the work I do is b/c I enjoy it. I don't make a lot, and we can get by without the pay--although it is nice to have. I work b/c I like having the outlet in my life and keeping active in preparation for when I return to the workforce full time. BUT, I would never want to do this 40 hours a week. No way!

[Anonymous]

I make a good a significant amount more than my husband, and I have the better benefits package, so we're all on my insurance. If I didn't work, we'd be paying for insurance through his job (whereas we pay nothing for mine). We'd likely have to move... I don't even know how far out of town, in order to find a place we could afford on just his salary. It would be tough.

So for that reason we NEED me working.

Plus, the idea of not having my own retirement savings, my own contributions to Social Security, etc, makes me very uneasy. Gog forbid something happens to him, or to us...

On top of that, I WANT to work. I enjoy what I do. I worked very hard and paid a lot of money for my education, and while I always intended to have children, I also always intended to use my education.

[Anonymous]

I don't really have to (we could live on DH's salary) but I do because I was very poor growing up and I don't want to be worried about money all the time. I make a good salary, do what I always wanted to do, my job is flexible, plus I have Wednesdays off to spend with DD.

[Anonymous]

I want to. I have a 35 hour work week, which suits me perfectly. We could certainly live on my husband's income alone, but I must admit that now I'm addicted to the extra $$. I don't know what I would do all day with the kids in school.

[Anonymous]

I want to work (and do). I did SAH for 4+ years and I am happier working (though I wish I could work fewer hours).

[Anonymous]

I both have to and want to work. I enjoy my career. I'm in healthcare and work with soldiers returning from Iraq and Afganistan. My job is very rewarding and I feel I'm a good role model for my children.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I would work fewer hours if it didn't mean a huge hit to my career. If it meant fewer hours of paying for child care, we could swing the pay cut...

[Anonymous]

I want to, but I'm also the sole breadwinner. All my friends are at work - I'm social and my husband is not. I feel my work is meaningful and leading to something even more meaningful. I know that I work out of desire to do so because I daydream about winning the lottery and starting a philanthropic organization. I do not daydream about being rich enough to do nothing - rather rich enough to do Something.

My parents are small business owners and worked 12 hour days. But the business was on our property. Everyone should just do what works for their family and not think twice about the haters.

[Anonymous]

We could survive on my husband's salary. But life is more than survival. My salary means we can afford private school (where my kids are thriving), we can save for retirement, save for our kids college education, eat healthily, go out occasionally, and not fret too much about money. We don't live lavishly -- our mortgage is small, and we drive second hand cars that are paid for and have no other debt. But when I hear posters on this board describe the way they live so the mom (it's usually the mom) can stay home, I think, no way. Life is too short to forgo all pleasure so one person can stay home.

[Anonymous]

I have to.