husband wants to keep baby and I don't

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And yes, when that 11 yo DD finds out, she’ll be impacted. Maybe for the better and she’ll cherish life and not weigh a human life against her own convenience

If these two can behave like adults, which I have my doubts about given his jumping to divorce immediately, there is really no reason why the 11 year old should know. If she found out as an adult, she would hopefully be understanding of an adult decision. If my mom had told me at 11 she was pregnant and I was getting a sibling, I would have been HORRIFIED and wondered why she was trying to ruin my life and the life of our family starting over with an infant, so your anticipated reaction is far from universal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And yes, when that 11 yo DD finds out, she’ll be impacted. Maybe for the better and she’ll cherish life and not weigh a human life against her own convenience

If these two can behave like adults, which I have my doubts about given his jumping to divorce immediately, there is really no reason why the 11 year old should know. If she found out as an adult, she would hopefully be understanding of an adult decision. If my mom had told me at 11 she was pregnant and I was getting a sibling, I would have been HORRIFIED and wondered why she was trying to ruin my life and the life of our family starting over with an infant, so your anticipated reaction is far from universal.

Really? That's interesting but not surprising that selfish narcissist is a proponent of abortion for convenience.

Nevertheless, your statement about why your parents were "trying to ruin my life" actually supports what I said, which was that the 11 yo DD would be impacted by the decision. How she would be impacted was the speculative part, I simply said I hoped it would lead to her to think more carefully before disposing of human life for convenience. You apparently would be impacted in horrific way that your precious apple cart was jostled and you might get less toys for Christmas. Horrific. By all means, kill the baby.

[Anonymous]

I would never forgive me wife for aborting a child that we made together, unless I was completely on board with it. I would divorce over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never forgive me wife for aborting a child that we made together, unless I was completely on board with it. I would divorce over it.

Agreed. Fundamental difference on the sanctity of life, not to mention the unilateral approach to such a massive decision. Society likes to preach women's independence, and the Left like to use this as a scare tactic to vote a certain way, but a husband and a wife making a decision together on a pregnancy should be common sense. Otherwise, that's not a marriage at all. If my wife did it, it would be a million times worse than a ONS with some random bloke

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never forgive me wife for aborting a child that we made together, unless I was completely on board with it. I would divorce over it.

Agreed. Fundamental difference on the sanctity of life, not to mention the unilateral approach to such a massive decision. Society likes to preach women's independence, and the Left like to use this as a scare tactic to vote a certain way, but a husband and a wife making a decision together on a pregnancy should be common sense. Otherwise, that's not a marriage at all. If my wife did it, it would be a million times worse than a ONS with some random bloke

Well given you don't have a uterus. I don't see the issue here.

Her body her choice. You are basically saying she has to keep the pregnancy, so you are not actually talking this over with your wife.

If you don't like that then make sure you have a vasectomy.

By the way the Ultra Right is single issue voting on this issue and it's hurting the whole country. Former Republican here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And yes, when that 11 yo DD finds out, she’ll be impacted. Maybe for the better and she’ll cherish life and not weigh a human life against her own convenience

If these two can behave like adults, which I have my doubts about given his jumping to divorce immediately, there is really no reason why the 11 year old should know. If she found out as an adult, she would hopefully be understanding of an adult decision. If my mom had told me at 11 she was pregnant and I was getting a sibling, I would have been HORRIFIED and wondered why she was trying to ruin my life and the life of our family starting over with an infant, so your anticipated reaction is far from universal.

Actually my mom was in this situation; her mom became pregnant with with a sibling, did not want to have the sibling, and my mom was old enough to be completely embarrassed and understand her mom didn't want to have the baby.

Pre legal abortion days, so grandma had the baby because she had to, he knew he wasn't wanted, and grew up with many mental health issues; my mom had to deal with it and help him until the day she died, as she had to take over helping him after grandma died. And now I help him on occasion. Sometimes it's best for everyone to have the abortion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And yes, when that 11 yo DD finds out, she’ll be impacted. Maybe for the better and she’ll cherish life and not weigh a human life against her own convenience

If these two can behave like adults, which I have my doubts about given his jumping to divorce immediately, there is really no reason why the 11 year old should know. If she found out as an adult, she would hopefully be understanding of an adult decision. If my mom had told me at 11 she was pregnant and I was getting a sibling, I would have been HORRIFIED and wondered why she was trying to ruin my life and the life of our family starting over with an infant, so your anticipated reaction is far from universal.

Actually my mom was in this situation; her mom became pregnant with with a sibling, did not want to have the sibling, and my mom was old enough to be completely embarrassed and understand her mom didn't want to have the baby.

Pre legal abortion days, so grandma had the baby because she had to, he knew he wasn't wanted, and grew up with many mental health issues; my mom had to deal with it and help him until the day she died, as she had to take over helping him after grandma died. And now I help him on occasion. Sometimes it's best for everyone to have the abortion.

Gross.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't terminate a pregnancy based on lesser inheritance for a current child, but, I do think this is solely the decision of the the woman. She should take the husband's wishes into consideration but ultimately only she can decide as it's her body.

OP needs to take some time and really dive into her feelings and not make any quick decisions. If I got pregnant right now, I wouldn't really want to have another child as it would be a total disruption to our lives, but I would not rule it out right away.

We have a family friend who had a third "oops" baby over a decade after the second. The mom did not want it but the dad promised to do handle all the night wakings and day to day care if she would agree to a third. That worked for them. Of course they both adored the kid once he was there with them.

But if there are some health issues, financial issues or if this is truly not something OP can ever see for herself, then that's her choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never forgive me wife for aborting a child that we made together, unless I was completely on board with it. I would divorce over it.

Or she could divorce you first and still have the abortion.

You do not get to decide for her. Her body her choice.

She should divorce you, if you can not understand her thought process.

[Anonymous]

Pregnancy has the potential to end a woman's life.

Certain factors decrease the risk, but nothing eliminates it.

The woman should always have the final say. However, life is complicated and others are free to socially ostracize a woman who makes the decision to terminate.

[Anonymous]

Did OP ever update this? I'm wondering how it all shook out in the end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And yes, when that 11 yo DD finds out, she’ll be impacted. Maybe for the better and she’ll cherish life and not weigh a human life against her own convenience

That 11 year old will likely never find out and it means more to you than to her. Of course if you are a drama queen you can find drama in anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pregnancy has the potential to end a woman's life.

Certain factors decrease the risk, but nothing eliminates it.

The woman should always have the final say. However, life is complicated and others are free to socially ostracize a woman who makes the decision to terminate.

And you know who has terminated and why and it’s up to you to judge?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And yes, when that 11 yo DD finds out, she’ll be impacted. Maybe for the better and she’ll cherish life and not weigh a human life against her own convenience

If these two can behave like adults, which I have my doubts about given his jumping to divorce immediately, there is really no reason why the 11 year old should know. If she found out as an adult, she would hopefully be understanding of an adult decision. If my mom had told me at 11 she was pregnant and I was getting a sibling, I would have been HORRIFIED and wondered why she was trying to ruin my life and the life of our family starting over with an infant, so your anticipated reaction is far from universal.

Actually my mom was in this situation; her mom became pregnant with with a sibling, did not want to have the sibling, and my mom was old enough to be completely embarrassed and understand her mom didn't want to have the baby.

Pre legal abortion days, so grandma had the baby because she had to, he knew he wasn't wanted, and grew up with many mental health issues; my mom had to deal with it and help him until the day she died, as she had to take over helping him after grandma died. And now I help him on occasion. Sometimes it's best for everyone to have the abortion.

Gross.

No. Not gross. Just brutally honest.

[Anonymous]

wow committing murder over money. You need help lady.