Who Is Most Out Of Bounds Here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Both were wrong. Your DH was WAY more wrong.

Agree with this. One guy called another guy’s daughter fat, not to her. One guy blew up the other guy’s marriage.

Call my daughter fat on Facebook and you should expect a debilitating disproportionate response. Also, if you don’t cheat, you can’t be called out for cheating.

Well is she fat?

Doesn't matter if she is I will blow you up, if she is not I will blow you up.

You are not my friend and I don't care about you or your family at this point.

If you don't care about your family and you make destructive decisions that terribly affect them why would you hold me to a higher standard.

Bye Felicia.

I have so many questions for people like you. I really wonder how you manage to act in social, professional, and emotional situations. I mean, I guess I know, I'm just so glad I'm not surrounded by people like you. Better go get a fresh Mama Bear sticker for your minivan, you wouldn't want the old one to fade.

I'm not the PP, and I'm someone who is VERY measured in all the situations you describe. At work I actually am like, the person people call to deal with difficult people because I have a seemingly never ending well of self control and patience. It is my specialty, taming other emotionally volatile people.

But I have to say if someone called my daughter fat on the internet I too believe I would have a debilitating disproportionate response, regardless of her weight. Girls these days (of every size) need NO help worrying about their bodies. And this type of comment from someone you know can ring in your ears for the rest of your life. I would absolutely lose my sh*t.

Kids deserve parents who will go to the mattresses for them, no one ever fought for me growing up (guess how I got to be so good at dealing with emotionally volatile people?), I'm not going to let my kids down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

Horrific treatment? You exaggerate a bit much.

I mean there have CLEARLY been other incidents! OP's wife has long suspected him of BPD! This is obviously not the first offense.

And I guess you think differently about your kids than I do because if someone called my teenage daughter fat in any way shape or form, let alone in a way clearly designed to mock her in a celebratory moment on my public Facebook page I would lose my ever loving sh*t. I would delete the person's post, unfriend them and excoriate them on text and not blow up their life because I wouldn't want that on MY page but I would lose my mind. And talk an incredible amount of crap about them to everyone who would listen. That is absolutely a horrific thing to do.

Deleting the post, unfriending them, and sending a private text are all perfectly acceptable responses. Talking crap about them like telling people about Dave’s affair? That’s going too far. Telling people what they did? Fine, but honestly at a certain point it makes you look crazy and you need to let it go. Dave is clearly a bad guy so his comment shouldn’t mean much.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Have an affair, tell people about it, then treat those people badly you don't get to walk around all wah wah wah when the consequences hit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Both were wrong. Your DH was WAY more wrong.

Agree with this. One guy called another guy’s daughter fat, not to her. One guy blew up the other guy’s marriage.

Call my daughter fat on Facebook and you should expect a debilitating disproportionate response. Also, if you don’t cheat, you can’t be called out for cheating.

Well is she fat?

Doesn't matter if she is I will blow you up, if she is not I will blow you up.

You are not my friend and I don't care about you or your family at this point.

If you don't care about your family and you make destructive decisions that terribly affect them why would you hold me to a higher standard.

Bye Felicia.

I have so many questions for people like you. I really wonder how you manage to act in social, professional, and emotional situations. I mean, I guess I know, I'm just so glad I'm not surrounded by people like you. Better go get a fresh Mama Bear sticker for your minivan, you wouldn't want the old one to fade.

I'm not the PP, and I'm someone who is VERY measured in all the situations you describe. At work I actually am like, the person people call to deal with difficult people because I have a seemingly never ending well of self control and patience. It is my specialty, taming other emotionally volatile people.

But I have to say if someone called my daughter fat on the internet I too believe I would have a debilitating disproportionate response, regardless of her weight. Girls these days (of every size) need NO help worrying about their bodies. And this type of comment from someone you know can ring in your ears for the rest of your life. I would absolutely lose my sh*t.

Kids deserve parents who will go to the mattresses for them, no one ever fought for me growing up (guess how I got to be so good at dealing with emotionally volatile people?), I'm not going to let my kids down.

How does making the comment more memorable by making a big deal help the kid? OP's parent let their own kid down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Both were wrong. Your DH was WAY more wrong.

Agree with this. One guy called another guy’s daughter fat, not to her. One guy blew up the other guy’s marriage.

Call my daughter fat on Facebook and you should expect a debilitating disproportionate response. Also, if you don’t cheat, you can’t be called out for cheating.

Well is she fat?

Doesn't matter if she is I will blow you up, if she is not I will blow you up.

You are not my friend and I don't care about you or your family at this point.

If you don't care about your family and you make destructive decisions that terribly affect them why would you hold me to a higher standard.

Bye Felicia.

I have so many questions for people like you. I really wonder how you manage to act in social, professional, and emotional situations. I mean, I guess I know, I'm just so glad I'm not surrounded by people like you. Better go get a fresh Mama Bear sticker for your minivan, you wouldn't want the old one to fade.

I'm not the PP, and I'm someone who is VERY measured in all the situations you describe. At work I actually am like, the person people call to deal with difficult people because I have a seemingly never ending well of self control and patience. It is my specialty, taming other emotionally volatile people.

But I have to say if someone called my daughter fat on the internet I too believe I would have a debilitating disproportionate response, regardless of her weight. Girls these days (of every size) need NO help worrying about their bodies. And this type of comment from someone you know can ring in your ears for the rest of your life. I would absolutely lose my sh*t.

Kids deserve parents who will go to the mattresses for them, no one ever fought for me growing up (guess how I got to be so good at dealing with emotionally volatile people?), I'm not going to let my kids down.

How does making the comment more memorable by making a big deal help the kid? OP's parent let their own kid down.

I don't know what to tell you. There are clearly two types of people here. The people for whom such an insult to their kid would cause them to see red and lash out before they could even think properly about it and the people who act like those people are crazy.

I would rather be the former. To an extent of course. Here we have a relationship that has clearly had drama in the past and a dad defending his daughter. I would rather see my parent fight for me than try to sweep it under the rug. To each their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Both were wrong. Your DH was WAY more wrong.

Agree with this. One guy called another guy’s daughter fat, not to her. One guy blew up the other guy’s marriage.

Call my daughter fat on Facebook and you should expect a debilitating disproportionate response. Also, if you don’t cheat, you can’t be called out for cheating.

Well is she fat?

Doesn't matter if she is I will blow you up, if she is not I will blow you up.

You are not my friend and I don't care about you or your family at this point.

If you don't care about your family and you make destructive decisions that terribly affect them why would you hold me to a higher standard.

Bye Felicia.

I have so many questions for people like you. I really wonder how you manage to act in social, professional, and emotional situations. I mean, I guess I know, I'm just so glad I'm not surrounded by people like you. Better go get a fresh Mama Bear sticker for your minivan, you wouldn't want the old one to fade.

You should be glad you sound like a Karen who never wants to be called on her sh!t.

I’m extremely successful socially, professionally and emotionally.

But he drunk Karen treating your waitress like crap, I will stand up to you for her.

You bully a family because their kid with Tourette’s is making noise at a restaurant. I’m gonna be there to shut you down.

Sorry Karen!

[Anonymous]

It’s almost like if you don’t want your cheating exposed - in any way, including on Facebook - you should just, not cheat? I mean what a crazy concept here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

Horrific treatment? You exaggerate a bit much.

I mean there have CLEARLY been other incidents! OP's wife has long suspected him of BPD! This is obviously not the first offense.

And I guess you think differently about your kids than I do because if someone called my teenage daughter fat in any way shape or form, let alone in a way clearly designed to mock her in a celebratory moment on my public Facebook page I would lose my ever loving sh*t. I would delete the person's post, unfriend them and excoriate them on text and not blow up their life because I wouldn't want that on MY page but I would lose my mind. And talk an incredible amount of crap about them to everyone who would listen. That is absolutely a horrific thing to do.

Deleting the post, unfriending them, and sending a private text are all perfectly acceptable responses. Talking crap about them like telling people about Dave’s affair? That’s going too far. Telling people what they did? Fine, but honestly at a certain point it makes you look crazy and you need to let it go. Dave is clearly a bad guy so his comment shouldn’t mean much.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Have an affair, tell people about it, then treat those people badly you don't get to walk around all wah wah wah when the consequences hit.

Would you shut up with the Play Stupid Games crap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

Horrific treatment? You exaggerate a bit much.

I mean there have CLEARLY been other incidents! OP's wife has long suspected him of BPD! This is obviously not the first offense.

And I guess you think differently about your kids than I do because if someone called my teenage daughter fat in any way shape or form, let alone in a way clearly designed to mock her in a celebratory moment on my public Facebook page I would lose my ever loving sh*t. I would delete the person's post, unfriend them and excoriate them on text and not blow up their life because I wouldn't want that on MY page but I would lose my mind. And talk an incredible amount of crap about them to everyone who would listen. That is absolutely a horrific thing to do.

Deleting the post, unfriending them, and sending a private text are all perfectly acceptable responses. Talking crap about them like telling people about Dave’s affair? That’s going too far. Telling people what they did? Fine, but honestly at a certain point it makes you look crazy and you need to let it go. Dave is clearly a bad guy so his comment shouldn’t mean much.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Have an affair, tell people about it, then treat those people badly you don't get to walk around all wah wah wah when the consequences hit.

Would you shut up with the Play Stupid Games crap.

I only said it once hahaha, strike a nerve?

[Anonymous]

I hope your daughter thinks FB is for old people and didn't see the dumpster fire reaction to her graduation. You should all grow up!

[Anonymous]

How are so many still ignoring the fact that Dave’s wife and kids did nothing wrong? Are you that dumb or just unwilling to see that there are innocent parties to this shit show and DH should have considered them. JFC. Grow the up. Only super trashy people act like this on social media and in public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How are so many still ignoring the fact that Dave’s wife and kids did nothing wrong? Are you that dumb or just unwilling to see that there are innocent parties to this shit show and DH should have considered them. JFC. Grow the up. Only super trashy people act like this on social media and in public.

I mean you are clearly just dragging this out so I just must be in the mood to argue with trolls about this but again, his family is the victim of HIM. If someone does something awful to me and I react, and my reaction done emotionally and in the moment in response to a completely unexpected and cruel gesture hurts the feelings of someone else, I may feel bad after the fact but the guilt of that does not in fact rest on my shoulders.

We are entitled to have our own human authentic reactions to events and do not have a responsibility to every person who could be impacted by it. I think the DH could have handled it better but I certainly don't blame him and in the context of the question at hand "who is most out of bounds here" it is not the DH! It is, in fact, definitively, Dave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are so many still ignoring the fact that Dave’s wife and kids did nothing wrong? Are you that dumb or just unwilling to see that there are innocent parties to this shit show and DH should have considered them. JFC. Grow the up. Only super trashy people act like this on social media and in public.

I mean you are clearly just dragging this out so I just must be in the mood to argue with trolls about this but again, his family is the victim of HIM. If someone does something awful to me and I react, and my reaction done emotionally and in the moment in response to a completely unexpected and cruel gesture hurts the feelings of someone else, I may feel bad after the fact but the guilt of that does not in fact rest on my shoulders.

We are entitled to have our own human authentic reactions to events and do not have a responsibility to every person who could be impacted by it. I think the DH could have handled it better but I certainly don't blame him and in the context of the question at hand "who is most out of bounds here" it is not the DH! It is, in fact, definitively, Dave.

Grow up and stop this performative justice. It’s gross and trashy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are so many still ignoring the fact that Dave’s wife and kids did nothing wrong? Are you that dumb or just unwilling to see that there are innocent parties to this shit show and DH should have considered them. JFC. Grow the up. Only super trashy people act like this on social media and in public.

I mean you are clearly just dragging this out so I just must be in the mood to argue with trolls about this but again, his family is the victim of HIM. If someone does something awful to me and I react, and my reaction done emotionally and in the moment in response to a completely unexpected and cruel gesture hurts the feelings of someone else, I may feel bad after the fact but the guilt of that does not in fact rest on my shoulders.

We are entitled to have our own human authentic reactions to events and do not have a responsibility to every person who could be impacted by it. I think the DH could have handled it better but I certainly don't blame him and in the context of the question at hand "who is most out of bounds here" it is not the DH! It is, in fact, definitively, Dave.

Grow up and stop this performative justice. It’s gross and trashy.

I do not think that means what you think it means haha

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are so many still ignoring the fact that Dave’s wife and kids did nothing wrong? Are you that dumb or just unwilling to see that there are innocent parties to this shit show and DH should have considered them. JFC. Grow the up. Only super trashy people act like this on social media and in public.

I mean you are clearly just dragging this out so I just must be in the mood to argue with trolls about this but again, his family is the victim of HIM. If someone does something awful to me and I react, and my reaction done emotionally and in the moment in response to a completely unexpected and cruel gesture hurts the feelings of someone else, I may feel bad after the fact but the guilt of that does not in fact rest on my shoulders.

We are entitled to have our own human authentic reactions to events and do not have a responsibility to every person who could be impacted by it. I think the DH could have handled it better but I certainly don't blame him and in the context of the question at hand "who is most out of bounds here" it is not the DH! It is, in fact, definitively, Dave.

Grow up and stop this performative justice. It’s gross and trashy.

I do not think that means what you think it means haha

Shows what you know and why you are ok with this kind of behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Both were wrong. Your DH was WAY more wrong.

Agree with this. One guy called another guy’s daughter fat, not to her. One guy blew up the other guy’s marriage.

Call my daughter fat on Facebook and you should expect a debilitating disproportionate response. Also, if you don’t cheat, you can’t be called out for cheating.

Well is she fat?

Doesn't matter if she is I will blow you up, if she is not I will blow you up.

You are not my friend and I don't care about you or your family at this point.

If you don't care about your family and you make destructive decisions that terribly affect them why would you hold me to a higher standard.

Bye Felicia.

I have so many questions for people like you. I really wonder how you manage to act in social, professional, and emotional situations. I mean, I guess I know, I'm just so glad I'm not surrounded by people like you. Better go get a fresh Mama Bear sticker for your minivan, you wouldn't want the old one to fade.

I'm not the PP, and I'm someone who is VERY measured in all the situations you describe. At work I actually am like, the person people call to deal with difficult people because I have a seemingly never ending well of self control and patience. It is my specialty, taming other emotionally volatile people.

But I have to say if someone called my daughter fat on the internet I too believe I would have a debilitating disproportionate response, regardless of her weight. Girls these days (of every size) need NO help worrying about their bodies. And this type of comment from someone you know can ring in your ears for the rest of your life. I would absolutely lose my sh*t.

Kids deserve parents who will go to the mattresses for them, no one ever fought for me growing up (guess how I got to be so good at dealing with emotionally volatile people?), I'm not going to let my kids down.

So you'd trade the feelings of Dave's kids for your own? Screw them and Dave's wife, right? As long as you can get revenge for what someone said about your daughter it's all good?