Appropriate age for boys to stop going into the locker room with their moms at the pool?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At our pool 7 and up must use their correct locker room.

It's 5 and up at our pool. That is too young, for my taste. My daughter is 4.5 and I really doubt she'd be able to go by herself, but my 6 year old has started going by himself.

[Anonymous]

Actually I have been happy seeing my 5.5 year old boy with low muscle tone manage to get himself changed into swim shirt/trunk and dry himself with towel & put on dry clothes. As long as I get him the bigger size shirt and bigger size shorts, he can do it by himself much more easier. He felt a bit embarrassed that he was the only kid needed help to get himself changed at daycare summer camp . Well, all 5/6 year old kids girls and boys I think they change in the classroom with women teachers/staffs, and I don’t think they are aware of gender but know that one should cover up your private parts ASAP, no fooling or looking around when changed.

I will send my boy in swim clothing to pool and I will either go to family stall or have DH/other older boy friends to go into men changing room or get him wrapped up in towel to get home showered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really suggesting if you had a boy age 3-4 ("older than toddler") you would send him into a mens' changing room alone?

+1, op, you’re crazy.

Agree with others - 7 years old but I’d be standing by that door like a hawk and listening to everything going on in the men’s lockers

JFC no one is raping your kid in the bathroom. They go alone at school all the time.

Going to the bathroom at school is different than changing clothes in a public pool bathroom. JFC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our pool 7 and up must use their correct locker room.

Everyone should follow the rules - but understand that most places don't have a posted policy like this.

At our pool, it’s age 5. And the neighborhood mommies know perfectly well, and flout it anyway. And 90% of them live within WALKING distance of the pool. I notify the staff each and every time.

[Anonymous]

I'm perfectly comfortable with my 7.5 year old DS changing by himself in the locker room. I take his 5 year old younger brother with me into the women's room, but next summer he'll likely be fine on his own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our pool 7 and up must use their correct locker room.

Same here.

As they should. Any 7yo who can’t handle walking from pool deck through a locker room to meet a parent or caregiver on the other side clearly needs a babysitter or special needs caregiver of the same sex. Any 7yo who can’t handle a 10-minute car ride home with a damp suit under a cover-up or clothes so they can shower and change at home is to precious and picky to participate in this activity.

It's not your call to make.

Actually, it is. The posted rule at my pool is age 5. And when I see people violating that rule—as they do because they are raising hapless kids—I notify the staff. That is my call to make, and I make it! Have a great day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our pool 7 and up must use their correct locker room.

Everyone should follow the rules - but understand that most places don't have a posted policy like this.

At our pool, it’s age 5. And the neighborhood mommies know perfectly well, and flout it anyway. And 90% of them live within WALKING distance of the pool. I notify the staff each and every time.

Sounds like that doesn't do anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our pool 7 and up must use their correct locker room.

Same here.

As they should. Any 7yo who can’t handle walking from pool deck through a locker room to meet a parent or caregiver on the other side clearly needs a babysitter or special needs caregiver of the same sex. Any 7yo who can’t handle a 10-minute car ride home with a damp suit under a cover-up or clothes so they can shower and change at home is to precious and picky to participate in this activity.

It's not your call to make.

Actually, it is. The posted rule at my pool is age 5. And when I see people violating that rule—as they do because they are raising hapless kids—I notify the staff. That is my call to make, and I make it! Have a great day.

It's a different story when there is a posted sign.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our pool 7 and up must use their correct locker room.

Everyone should follow the rules - but understand that most places don't have a posted policy like this.

At our pool, it’s age 5. And the neighborhood mommies know perfectly well, and flout it anyway. And 90% of them live within WALKING distance of the pool. I notify the staff each and every time.

Sounds like that doesn't do anything.

Yeah, it does. They have to leave immediately. And then they can’t claim ignorance. And if they get flagged by staff, their access is removed for the rest of the season. I’m on the board. It’s happened.

[Anonymous]

Most places do. Most people don’t read the policy. If you are in this situation, find and read the policy and act accordingly.

I am firmly in the riding home in a damp suit won’t permanently damage either your child or your vehicle camp. In fact, your child may learn that they can actually endure this hardship without breaking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really suggesting if you had a boy age 3-4 ("older than toddler") you would send him into a mens' changing room alone?

No, but I would have him change at home or in the car or even just under a towel, not out in the open in the women's locker room with his privates on full display. I felt bad for the kid, he was obviously embarrassed when he realize a girl from his class was seeing him naked and noticed my daughter staring. I was shocked his mother didn't care.

Why do you need to change at the pool at all? Get ready at home. Ride home in a suit after drying off, shower at home. What’s the big deal?

+100. What is with you people? You know your kid will survive a 10-minute car ride home in a damp suit, right?

If you have a 6yo or older who can’t manage to walk from pool deck to locker room in 30 seconds as you walk the same route in the women’s room and meet on the other side, you have bigger problems than damp bathing suits. If you don’t see him in 30 seconds, you can walk into the entrance and call for him, and if you don’t hear from him after another 10 seconds, you can yell in, “I’m coming in to get my son in 5 seconds.”

My kids (girls) need to have the chlorine washed off after he pool. And i dont want wet car seats. If its only daddy taking them to the pool (2 and 5) they do a deck change in a towel.

If it's hot enough to go for a swim, then those car seats will dry off in a flash in a hot garage or parked on the street. And do a quick shower at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would say 5 or 6. My 6 year old daughter has begun requesting privacy at home. She certainly does not want a boy from school seeing her naked.

If you have no other options, then you change at home. You don’t traumatize little girls because of your fear that something *might* happen.

Is it inherently traumatic to see a little boy changing? I guess I'll tell the entire rest of the world that their daughters are traumatized.

No, it’s not seeing a little boy changing, it’s having a boy their age see them changing when they’d prefer privacy. My girls started asking for privacy when they were 3. By 7 they definitely did not want to be changing their clothes in front of boys, especially boys on their class at school. It’s the girls locker room, so girls should have an expectation of privacy when they are in there, just as boys should have an expectation of privacy and therefore should use the male locker room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our pool 7 and up must use their correct locker room.

Everyone should follow the rules - but understand that most places don't have a posted policy like this.

At our pool, it’s age 5. And the neighborhood mommies know perfectly well, and flout it anyway. And 90% of them live within WALKING distance of the pool. I notify the staff each and every time.

Sounds like that doesn't do anything.

Yeah, it does. They have to leave immediately. And then they can’t claim ignorance. And if they get flagged by staff, their access is removed for the rest of the season. I’m on the board. It’s happened.

Then what's the issue here? Maybe you should tell OP that her issue isn't the mom, it's the pool she goes to, and she should fight to get a rule instituted at her facility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really suggesting if you had a boy age 3-4 ("older than toddler") you would send him into a mens' changing room alone?

+1, op, you’re crazy.

Agree with others - 7 years old but I’d be standing by that door like a hawk and listening to everything going on in the men’s lockers

JFC no one is raping your kid in the bathroom. They go alone at school all the time.

Really?! They have naked adult men in the school's bathroom? News to me.

[Anonymous]

Jesus you posters are in rare form today.

No kid is going to be traumatized from seeing a child of the opposite sex in the locker room. A child could be traumatized by going into a locker room alone if something were to happen (but that's not to say that something WILL happen). When in doubt, shouldn't we err on the side that has the potential to do less harm? We aren't talking about middle schoolers being in the opposite sex locker room. Boys of 7-8 years old are still quite young in some respects. Also, we don't know the particular reasons any family might make the choices they do.

That said, follow the rules if there are any, teach your kids to be discreet in the locker room no matter the circumstances, and get some perspective.