Appropriate age for boys to stop going into the locker room with their moms at the pool?

[Anonymous]

7-8. I have a 9 yo and he has been going to the men’s room alone for a couple of years.

[Anonymous]

I think beyond toddler age you need to keep your boy-in-women's locker room time to an absolute minimum. Boys can change in stall (or arrive with suits on?) and should not be wandering about. The female classmate should be able to change without worrying about her male classmate too!

[Anonymous]

I think it really depends on how capable the kid is and it's none of your business. Also, Americans are literally the only ones in the world this uptight about kids seeing other kids naked. Could it be that your child's classmate's mom was from a different country?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it really depends on how capable the kid is and it's none of your business. Also, Americans are literally the only ones in the world this uptight about kids seeing other kids naked. Could it be that your child's classmate's mom was from a different country?

Considering the boy had a "turtleneck" I would assume she's European, but I did not say anything to her so I'm not sure.

[Anonymous]

My 5 yo changed on his own at a HS pool locker room when I took him to swim lessons. If it was a large public pool, probably 7-8 would be youngest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really suggesting if you had a boy age 3-4 ("older than toddler") you would send him into a mens' changing room alone?

+1, op, you’re crazy.

Agree with others - 7 years old but I’d be standing by that door like a hawk and listening to everything going on in the men’s lockers

JFC no one is raping your kid in the bathroom. They go alone at school all the time.

Hey genius, 3 and 4 year olds don’t go to school…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it really depends on how capable the kid is and it's none of your business. Also, Americans are literally the only ones in the world this uptight about kids seeing other kids naked. Could it be that your child's classmate's mom was from a different country?

Considering the boy had a "turtleneck" I would assume she's European, but I did not say anything to her so I'm not sure.

There you go. All over Europe boys and girls are changing their clothes beside the lakes and at the beaches with not a thought of smudging anyone else's purity. It's only in America that people freak out.

[Anonymous]

I think 7 is the oldest that the county pools at rec centers (I’m in Fairfax County) allow boys to be in the women’s locker rooms with mom/grandma/whoever. I think that’s a fair cutoff. Seems like the kid you saw was on the upper end before the age cutoff but not “too old” yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think 7 is the oldest that the county pools at rec centers (I’m in Fairfax County) allow boys to be in the women’s locker rooms with mom/grandma/whoever. I think that’s a fair cutoff. Seems like the kid you saw was on the upper end before the age cutoff but not “too old” yet.

Agree. Also, if I have to take my kids in a locker room, I tell them to mind their own business/not look at other people.

[Anonymous]

My son stopped coming into the women’s room with me when he started kindergarten. I was worried of the exact situation OP described. We found single rooms for a while for both pools and stores. He was using the men’s room alone by 7 or 8 depending on the location.

[Anonymous]

Around 7. I would take him to a stall or shower or find a less busy location.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't send my 7 year old son alone into a locker room, no. Unless he was with an older sibling or someone we knew. Probably closer to age 8-9.

But I would go into a stall for him to change. I think that's more of the issue.

+1

I have a 7 year old. I would not send him in alone so if my H or my older son is not around he comes with me. We would aim for a stall or otherwise try to be quick and discreet. Honestly we don’t change at our pool but also he changes swim trunks so quickly it would hardly be long enough to matter.

Put another way OP - you aren’t sending your 7 year old alone into a locker room either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really suggesting if you had a boy age 3-4 ("older than toddler") you would send him into a mens' changing room alone?

No, but I would have him change at home or in the car or even just under a towel, not out in the open in the women's locker room with his privates on full display. I felt bad for the kid, he was obviously embarrassed when he realize a girl from his class was seeing him naked and noticed my daughter staring. I was shocked his mother didn't care.

Why do you need to change at the pool at all? Get ready at home. Ride home in a suit after drying off, shower at home. What’s the big deal?

[Anonymous]

I let my 6 year old use the mens locker room at our community pool, but wouldn’t feel comfortable at the rec center where it is louder/bigger and there is more going on. My 4.5 year old can’t get his wet swim trunks/ swim shirt up and down very well on his own sometimes, so he still comes with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't send my 7 year old son alone into a locker room, no. Unless he was with an older sibling or someone we knew. Probably closer to age 8-9.

But I would go into a stall for him to change. I think that's more of the issue.

This, but at that age, we'd generally do a quick walk through if there was no other exit and change in the car or somewhere private under a towel.

I would not be ok, especially in a public bathroom to have a young child alone.