Where do private schools really get you in life?
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
This is correct. We’re not doing it for college, as our kids college prospects would probably actually be better coming from a less connected cohort. But I had a terrible experience in a “great” public school and wanted a very different environment for my kids, and that’s what we’ve gotten. No regrets. |
Anonymous
NP Your response to the previous post is bizarre. Even if I admit there is something such as a "social climber", I would assume that meant moving into "social" spheres you were not born into. That has nothing to do with noting that some high schools are better preparing their students for college. Are you sure you have the right phrase? |
Anonymous
|
Look, to me it's pretty simple. If you can afford it without stretching, go for it. There are worse things to spend your money on.
But you really have to have a lot of money not to stretch for it. The top privates in this area costs more than 50k in after tax dollars, so you're having to gross, what, 75k per year per kid for that? When I was a partner in Biglaw I knew many partners who were spending $150k-$200k a year in after tax dollars for literally decades to educate their families from K through college. Quite literally millions of dollars in pre-tax earnings. That's a stretch even for wealthy people. Yes, in the end this resulted in more frequent admissions to top private colleges (not always Ivy, though), but adulthood really is the great equalizer. We went the public school and state college route, and as a result I was able to retire 15 years early. On top of that, the younger children of the partners I used to work with now reach out to my highly successful kids to network in the same fields. To each her own, of course, but you'll never convince me that private school is the smart choice for anyone but the super wealthy, especially if you live in a strong public school district. |
Anonymous
It's really not. Professors who have been teaching the same subject probably don't encounter that many kids who really challenge them to think about something new. One of my law school professors noted in a clerkship recommendation that I asked him a civil procedure question he had never contemplated. A mathematics professor in undergrad went out of the way to show the class when I solved a problem in a way he had never seen. In neither case was I the best student in the class, but both professors found the new approaches notable and recommended me based on it. |
Anonymous
| I sat in class, bored out of my mind in all the AP classes in my high performing suburban high school. I didn’t experience academic challenge in the classroom until college. So if you can find a private school that saves kids from that, it saves them from wasting years of their lives not learning anything interesting. |
Anonymous
Professor thought she was cute. Saw this all the time. |
Anonymous
Well aren't you special. |
Anonymous
|
Don’t think they will put your kid in a good college. They don’t promise that, they are not in obligation to do it, and they can’t do it to everyone.
Actually, a kid coming from public may be in a better position than a kid coming from private with the same GPA, because it is probably a sign that the first is self motivated. |
Anonymous
| We send our kids to private school so that they can get a religious education in addition to the subjects covered in public schools. If it wasn't for the religious dimension, public school would be fine for us. |
Anonymous
Wow, those two PPs are AMAZING. Far from best students, but have ground breaking insights in law, math, and econ. |
Anonymous
This is a valid point. If you are never challenged, you never learn the skills needed to work above your current level. This is why the transition to a rigorous school with traditional grading is often a huge wake up call to smart kids accustomed to coasting. Many kids work hard in traditional public high schools and do very well in life. But there is a category of kids who don't have to work hard there to get by, and they often need a different environment, where teachers don't let them coast, to learn how to apply themselves and stretch the limits of their abilities. These are your classic underachievers who need more to thrive. |
Anonymous
I am the PP. For the record I attended an top private in the area and I’m sure it helped me in admissions. But that’s not WHY I went there or why I would send my own child to a specific school. I went to the school I attended for single sex, faith based, whole child education and because I was gifted. My outcomes however have primarily been because of the single sex and while child education pieces. I think most UMC children will engage with content just fine in most environments but the warm and fuzzy stuff is where the rubber meets the road for many children. My own child is in FCPS because on their current academic level THEY can get both the academics they need with IEP accommodations and whole child education. Every couple of years I reevaluate and look at everything from the schools for “quirky” kids like mine to the elite privates. And every time I opt to leave them where they are. |
Anonymous
That was far from my experience coming from a good, but nothing noteworthy public school. I and most of my friends from public did as well or better than friends from fancy privates. The few most accomplished in my group of friends went to public. And this all presupposes that your kid will get into an elite college. Maybe she will, maybe she won't. But paying $50k per year on the hope that it will give her a leg up at her elite college seems incredibly misguided. |
Anonymous
|
In addition to excellent academic foundations, resources, and more individualized attention, prep schools really do prepare their students for college — both academically and socially. They also give students lifelong resources — in peers, fellow classmates and alumni connections.
If I apply for a job and the other candidate shares a few school connections with the hiring manager, I’d say that the other candidates has an advantage when it comes to determining who might seem to be the “better fit”. |
Anonymous
|
OP, it sounds like you are waitlisted at STA and your kid is headed to somewhere like Landon.
We were in your position a few years ago. We felt like STA was worth it (unique setting, super high academics, and yes prestige) but in our situation, a place like Landon was not. We kept the kid in public and he did really well. We ended up reapplying to to STA and he was admitted on the second try. I will say the only issue is that you say your son is struggling in public due to the pandemic. That is totally understandable but will make admissions at STA or similar difficult if not impossible. There are plenty of kids who have been able to keep-it-together grades wise this year, despite the circumstances. In this case, I would probably go with the back-up school. |