Where do private schools really get you in life?

Anonymous
Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.

We've been at a progressive private for 10 years with multiple children and you are right. It is no longer progressive and liberal leaning, it has become really disturbing and almost like brain washing. "Group think" to the max. I would leave if our oldest wasn't already in upper school. Rethinking if we will stay for younger kids for their high school years. I think the time spent there for the younger years has served them well but might be time to move on to Whitman in a couple years. It's amazing how the tenor has changed so quickly at our private in just three years.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You have fallen into a social climbing trap that will turn out the way you dream it will.


THIS.

My sister went to Holton Arms. She went to an Ivy with an assortment of people from other privates like her AND publics of all kinds. She was miserable in high school, miserable in college, has no friends from Holton Arms. She repeatedly talks about what a waste of her mental health it was. It served her nothing.

I went to McLean High. I went to Berkeley. I am not miserable and have lots of friends from both places.

There is literally zero correlation between private school and your CHILD's wellbeing. If they are resilient, smart and resourceful, a successful life they will make.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.


It has gotten crazy at our progressive school too. Query - Is it transphobic if you are a heterosexual cis gender boy that doesn’t want to date a trans girl? My son was declared transphobic by a small group of classmates when he was repeatedly asked if (hypothetically) he would date a trans girl and he finally said no - this is during homeroom. He is 12 years old. He was upset and felt shamed by classmates. He told me after school he didn’t want to date a girl that had a penis, but couldn’t say that in class. I had to reassure him that it didn’t make him transphobic, but then my older teenager INSISTED that it did make him transphobic. Since when do heterosexuals have to be sexually attracted to transgender people? WTF?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.


It has gotten crazy at our progressive school too. Query - Is it transphobic if you are a heterosexual cis gender boy that doesn’t want to date a trans girl? My son was declared transphobic by a small group of classmates when he was repeatedly asked if (hypothetically) he would date a trans girl and he finally said no - this is during homeroom. He is 12 years old. He was upset and felt shamed by classmates. He told me after school he didn’t want to date a girl that had a penis, but couldn’t say that in class. I had to reassure him that it didn’t make him transphobic, but then my older teenager INSISTED that it did make him transphobic. Since when do heterosexuals have to be sexually attracted to transgender people? WTF?


I don’t believe that this was a classroom discussion. Someone is lying.
Anonymous
PP never said it was a classroom discussion. Kids talk about all sorts of things among themselves before class starts/in homeroom.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.


It has gotten crazy at our progressive school too. Query - Is it transphobic if you are a heterosexual cis gender boy that doesn’t want to date a trans girl? My son was declared transphobic by a small group of classmates when he was repeatedly asked if (hypothetically) he would date a trans girl and he finally said no - this is during homeroom. He is 12 years old. He was upset and felt shamed by classmates. He told me after school he didn’t want to date a girl that had a penis, but couldn’t say that in class. I had to reassure him that it didn’t make him transphobic, but then my older teenager INSISTED that it did make him transphobic. Since when do heterosexuals have to be sexually attracted to transgender people? WTF?


This sounds like conversations between students not a teacher facilitated discussion. I wouldn’t get too upset by it. Just maybe teach your teen what homophobic/anti-LGBTQ really means.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.


It has gotten crazy at our progressive school too. Query - Is it transphobic if you are a heterosexual cis gender boy that doesn’t want to date a trans girl? My son was declared transphobic by a small group of classmates when he was repeatedly asked if (hypothetically) he would date a trans girl and he finally said no - this is during homeroom. He is 12 years old. He was upset and felt shamed by classmates. He told me after school he didn’t want to date a girl that had a penis, but couldn’t say that in class. I had to reassure him that it didn’t make him transphobic, but then my older teenager INSISTED that it did make him transphobic. Since when do heterosexuals have to be sexually attracted to transgender people? WTF?


This sounds like conversations between students not a teacher facilitated discussion. I wouldn’t get too upset by it. Just maybe teach your teen what homophobic/anti-LGBTQ really means.


Correct. It was not a teacher facilitated discussion. Teacher was present but not involved. I have discussed this with my son and I have validated that his feelings just mean he is heterosexual and does not mean he is transphobic. Trust me, he knows what homophobic and anti-LGBTQ means and has close family members that are LGBTQ.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.


It has gotten crazy at our progressive school too. Query - Is it transphobic if you are a heterosexual cis gender boy that doesn’t want to date a trans girl? My son was declared transphobic by a small group of classmates when he was repeatedly asked if (hypothetically) he would date a trans girl and he finally said no - this is during homeroom. He is 12 years old. He was upset and felt shamed by classmates. He told me after school he didn’t want to date a girl that had a penis, but couldn’t say that in class. I had to reassure him that it didn’t make him transphobic, but then my older teenager INSISTED that it did make him transphobic. Since when do heterosexuals have to be sexually attracted to transgender people? WTF?

That’s like saying a trans person who says they are only attracted to men, is phobic of vaginas.
I agree it is CRAZY and harmful to kids yo constantly be asked to justify themselves no matter what category they consider themselves to be
I believe that this discussion happened
The teacher should have shut it down
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You have fallen into a social climbing trap that will turn out the way you dream it will.


THIS.

My sister went to Holton Arms. She went to an Ivy with an assortment of people from other privates like her AND publics of all kinds. She was miserable in high school, miserable in college, has no friends from Holton Arms. She repeatedly talks about what a waste of her mental health it was. It served her nothing.

I went to McLean High. I went to Berkeley. I am not miserable and have lots of friends from both places.

There is literally zero correlation between private school and your CHILD's wellbeing. If they are resilient, smart and resourceful, a successful life they will make.

I think this is more common than people coming into private for 9th would believe
Anonymous
I went to private school in the 1980s and early 1990s when a generous alum gave a lot of money to my school to bring in a more economically diverse student body. In hindsight it would have made a really interesting research study. A few decades later I can say that just a few of my new classmates from disadvantaged households did much better than their parents, they had been chosen based on their strong academic performance and often got in to great colleges based on our high school but several dropped out or didn't really launch into much of a career after graduating. Sadly I would say that most of my peers are somewhat similar to their parents financially and in terms of socioeconomic status. Some of the less ambitious rich kids still did well based on family money or connections. So what does private school really get you in life? I don't know, I think my experience was that a student's home and other cultural factors were a stronger predictor of future success decades later.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.


It has gotten crazy at our progressive school too. Query - Is it transphobic if you are a heterosexual cis gender boy that doesn’t want to date a trans girl? My son was declared transphobic by a small group of classmates when he was repeatedly asked if (hypothetically) he would date a trans girl and he finally said no - this is during homeroom. He is 12 years old. He was upset and felt shamed by classmates. He told me after school he didn’t want to date a girl that had a penis, but couldn’t say that in class. I had to reassure him that it didn’t make him transphobic, but then my older teenager INSISTED that it did make him transphobic. Since when do heterosexuals have to be sexually attracted to transgender people? WTF?


I don’t believe that this was a classroom discussion. Someone is lying.


I have a 13yo at one of these schools and I 100% believe that this conversation could take place among students. Who cares that it was an inappropriate question to force the other student to answer to begin with (if someone was pressuring a closeted gay kid to state who they are attracted to, the person asking would be in trouble with the school) students are so confident in their self-righteousness that they would happily shame this kid who didn’t do a thing wrong.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I went to private school in the 1980s and early 1990s when a generous alum gave a lot of money to my school to bring in a more economically diverse student body. In hindsight it would have made a really interesting research study. A few decades later I can say that just a few of my new classmates from disadvantaged households did much better than their parents, they had been chosen based on their strong academic performance and often got in to great colleges based on our high school but several dropped out or didn't really launch into much of a career after graduating. Sadly I would say that most of my peers are somewhat similar to their parents financially and in terms of socioeconomic status. Some of the less ambitious rich kids still did well based on family money or connections. So what does private school really get you in life? I don't know, I think my experience was that a student's home and other cultural factors were a stronger predictor of future success decades later.


Your last sentence make it seem like it’s completely black and white. The lack of nuance needs to be acknowledged.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.

We've been at a progressive private for 10 years with multiple children and you are right. It is no longer progressive and liberal leaning, it has become really disturbing and almost like brain washing. "Group think" to the max. I would leave if our oldest wasn't already in upper school. Rethinking if we will stay for younger kids for their high school years. I think the time spent there for the younger years has served them well but might be time to move on to Whitman in a couple years. It's amazing how the tenor has changed so quickly at our private in just three years.


Same bad impression too, possibly same school. Lots of changes and it went from being all sides to insanely biased and one-sided. Plus overhearing what teachers said and answered during virtual school was disturbing and often incorrect (factual stuff not ideological). We'll peel out soon.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Right now, they're getting a relentless indoctrination into leftist orthodoxy so they can be special snowflakes who claim victimhood at every opportunity and can't listen to opposing viewpoints without dismissing it as "hate speech."

That's what all local private schools are peddling this year.


It has gotten crazy at our progressive school too. Query - Is it transphobic if you are a heterosexual cis gender boy that doesn’t want to date a trans girl? My son was declared transphobic by a small group of classmates when he was repeatedly asked if (hypothetically) he would date a trans girl and he finally said no - this is during homeroom. He is 12 years old. He was upset and felt shamed by classmates. He told me after school he didn’t want to date a girl that had a penis, but couldn’t say that in class. I had to reassure him that it didn’t make him transphobic, but then my older teenager INSISTED that it did make him transphobic. Since when do heterosexuals have to be sexually attracted to transgender people? WTF?


WTF.
If this is GDS pls tell me now. We have 4-5 weeks to pull out. That's peer bullying and abusive. Full stop.
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