Girlfriend’s mother obsessed with my lack of height

[Anonymous]

I don't like that your gf is framing the problem as her mother's problem. It's cowardly and dishonest on her part. If your height bothers her, she should own it and not make her mother the bad guy.

Even if her mother said it, why did she feel the need to repeat it? Height is out of your control so it's not worth discussing and not something you can work to improve.

Also, 5'3- 5'6 is a strange way to list height. Unlike weight, height can't fluctuate, lol. You are either one or the other. Further, 5'6 is also short for a man, so no point in stretching a truth that still places you in the same category.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you 5’3” or 5’6”?

Realistically, this will be a negative for every woman you meet. In what context did your girlfriend bring this up? It’s not like it would even be possible to hide it.

He’s 5’4 and very probably a troll.

The short guy whose girlfriend openly admits she's with him only for the money, why would that be a troll?

I do find it funny how everyone is suddenly pretending that most women don't care about height at all, and that shorter guys don't struggle because of it.

You’re misreading based on your own bias. Lots of women care. There are some / many who won’t, and those are the ones OP should seek out. Dating is hard, but OP doesn’t need to settle for less love or less perfect of a relationship because he’s short.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you 5’3” or 5’6”?

Realistically, this will be a negative for every woman you meet. In what context did your girlfriend bring this up? It’s not like it would even be possible to hide it.

He’s 5’4 and very probably a troll.

The short guy whose girlfriend openly admits she's with him only for the money, why would that be a troll?

I do find it funny how everyone is suddenly pretending that most women don't care about height at all, and that shorter guys don't struggle because of it.

You’re misreading based on your own bias. Lots of women care. There are some / many who won’t, and those are the ones OP should seek out. Dating is hard, but OP doesn’t need to settle for less love or less perfect of a relationship because he’s short.

No I'm not misreading. Folks are literally saying height shouldn't matter and women don't think about these things. Acting like gf is a bizarreo for having a preference most women have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't like that your gf is framing the problem as her mother's problem. It's cowardly and dishonest on her part. If your height bothers her, she should own it and not make her mother the bad guy.

Even if her mother said it, why did she feel the need to repeat it? Height is out of your control so it's not worth discussing and not something you can work to improve.

Also, 5'3- 5'6 is a strange way to list height. Unlike weight, height can't fluctuate, lol. You are either one or the other. Further, 5'6 is also short for a man, so no point in stretching a truth that still places you in the same category.

Because OP is also insecure about his height. as someone says he needs to own it and match with someone who is shorter than himself or someone taller who doesn't care that much.

GF has a problem with the height, but I suspect her bluntness is a cultural difference.

[Anonymous]

For the purpose of procreation, I wouldn't have wanted to mate with a man who was short. Now, that I am beyond the producing children phase I would entertain the idea of dating a man who is shorter than my preference.

[Anonymous]

You guys. He FOUND a girl who doesn’t care about height “that much” (isn’t a realbreaker). He should dump her and find a girl who cares absolutely not even a little? None exist. Not from any culture. Come ON.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't like that your gf is framing the problem as her mother's problem. It's cowardly and dishonest on her part. If your height bothers her, she should own it and not make her mother the bad guy.

Even if her mother said it, why did she feel the need to repeat it? Height is out of your control so it's not worth discussing and not something you can work to improve.

Also, 5'3- 5'6 is a strange way to list height. Unlike weight, height can't fluctuate, lol. You are either one or the other. Further, 5'6 is also short for a man, so no point in stretching a truth that still places you in the same category.

Because OP is also insecure about his height. as someone says he needs to own it and match with someone who is shorter than himself or someone taller who doesn't care that much.

GF has a problem with the height, but I suspect her bluntness is a cultural difference.

That's the thing-- she's not actually being blunt; she's being passive aggressive.

[Anonymous]

I can’t believe your GF would tell you this. That’s a huge red flag, OP.

[Anonymous]

I've seen some incredibly attractive short men. I haven't been involved with one but I would be if all things lined up.

You say she and her mom think you're marriage material but what do you think of your GF? She's not the only woman out there who would want to marry you.

[Anonymous]

Lol, OP here. I put a height range mainly for anonymity reasons because my Gf knows my exact height. I’m in the middle of that range. Yes there is a big difference between 5’3 and 5’6.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gf also said she probably would have gone for a different guy if I hadn’t tried hard in the beginning because my height was a negative for her as well

"That's funny, I felt I was settling because of your small tits/flat butt/stomach/nose/insert insecurity here. I guess we're really well suited!"

The difference is: all those things can be changed and don't automatically get passed on to your own offspring. Unfortunately, short stature, especially for men, is seen as a negative. I married a man just below average height and my DS, who fortunately, grew eventually to almost 5' 11" worried his entire childhoold that he would wind up short and asking us why to short people would get married knowing their children would also be short. With that being said, GF is a jerk for sharing that. I would move along.

That’s ridiculous. Of course noses and breast size are heritable. I have my father’s nose and my tits are exactly like my mother’s.

Well my mom has the body of prepubescent boy, I was a perky E cup at 17. Almost 40 now and not has perky, but definitely not saggy, H cup.

Yea, and a short parent can end up with a tall child. That's not the point. The chances of a short parent having a tall child is slim; the chances of a tall parent having a tall child is much higher.

Having stated that... I'm super short, and my DH is super tall. He did not care about the height difference, nor did he worry about having short children. But, I have never dated a super short man simply because I've never been attracted to a man who was super short.

And I'm sorry to say, that if someone does care about having short offsprings, then yes, that person is not going to want to date a short person. And I say this as a short person.

If you think this is going to bother your GF, then you should dump her. There are plenty of women who are willing to date/marry short me. My brother is super short - barely 5'4. And he is married. Yep, we are a super short family. My kids will be short to average. That is just a given.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't like that your gf is framing the problem as her mother's problem. It's cowardly and dishonest on her part. If your height bothers her, she should own it and not make her mother the bad guy.

Even if her mother said it, why did she feel the need to repeat it? Height is out of your control so it's not worth discussing and not something you can work to improve.

Also, 5'3- 5'6 is a strange way to list height. Unlike weight, height can't fluctuate, lol. You are either one or the other. Further, 5'6 is also short for a man, so no point in stretching a truth that still places you in the same category.

Because OP is also insecure about his height. as someone says he needs to own it and match with someone who is shorter than himself or someone taller who doesn't care that much.

GF has a problem with the height, but I suspect her bluntness is a cultural difference.

That's the thing-- she's not actually being blunt; she's being passive aggressive.

I am not sure this is right. OP is obviously insecure. Did he ask his girlfriend what she thinks? Did he ask if anyone has said anything to her?

Most guys I dated who had some sort of insecurity would ask stuff like that so I am guessing he got these comments only after quizzing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't like that your gf is framing the problem as her mother's problem. It's cowardly and dishonest on her part. If your height bothers her, she should own it and not make her mother the bad guy.

Even if her mother said it, why did she feel the need to repeat it? Height is out of your control so it's not worth discussing and not something you can work to improve.

Also, 5'3- 5'6 is a strange way to list height. Unlike weight, height can't fluctuate, lol. You are either one or the other. Further, 5'6 is also short for a man, so no point in stretching a truth that still places you in the same category.

Because OP is also insecure about his height. as someone says he needs to own it and match with someone who is shorter than himself or someone taller who doesn't care that much.

GF has a problem with the height, but I suspect her bluntness is a cultural difference.

That's the thing-- she's not actually being blunt; she's being passive aggressive.

No she's not. You are reading it that way because that's your American interpretation. This is very normal dating conversation in some cultures, mom/dad have the ultimate approval over if a relationship proceeds or not so what they think matters, parents tell you what they think, you discuss with them and the SO about chances of moving forward. Notice the bit about his career making him marriage material? I bet this is the kind of thing that is happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've seen some incredibly attractive short men. I haven't been involved with one but I would be if all things lined up.

You say she and her mom think you're marriage material but what do you think of your GF? She's not the only woman out there who would want to marry you.

PP again. Also if you married your GF you'd be forever forced to deal with someone important in your life who thinks your height is a problem (she'd be your MIL). Do you really want that for yourself, forever after?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol, OP here. I put a height range mainly for anonymity reasons because my Gf knows my exact height. I’m in the middle of that range. Yes there is a big difference between 5’3 and 5’6.

Nope. There isn't. Kids will still come out short.