Took a friend's kid on vacation, no acknowledgement or thank you?

[Anonymous]

OP, your expectations are entirely reasonable.

[Anonymous]

DCUM consensus!! A thank you is not necessary, for things big or small. Good to know! I must have been living in a different era, or an alternate universe. No more nagging my kids to be gracious or polite, phew.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is dysfunction in the family that has now become visible to you.

The mother is lacking in social graces as well as basic decency. You can only imagine what kind of mother she is when no one is looking. Don't expect anything from her.

The woman was on a work call. No one would say this about a man.

And as a matter of fact they aren't. OP didn't complain that the child's father didn't say thank you or send a thank you gift.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I echo what others have said. She is your friend! I find it odd to be so hung up on this little thing. If she is a habitual taker and ungrateful person generally, maybe you shouldn’t be friends. But if she just had a brain fart and forget to text you, I’d just let it go. When you invited her son, I assume she said something like ‘Larlo would love that! Thanks so much!’ And I bet if you hang out next week she’ll say ‘Thanks again for having Larlo, he had a blast!’ The lack of text at the moment of drop off when she was in the middle of something, shouldn’t be a big deal.

The text was sent yesterday and as of today, the OP had not heard back. Didn't sound to me like the OP was upset when the mom didn't reply right away, but a full day later and nothing? No one is that busy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DCUM consensus!! A thank you is not necessary, for things big or small. Good to know! I must have been living in a different era, or an alternate universe. No more nagging my kids to be gracious or polite, phew.

Hate to say this, but I’ve come to the same realization. No more welcome to the neighborhood and no more holiday gifts, no more house sitting while a neighbor is at a funeral, no more organizing meal trains, forget it. I’ve never heard as much as a thank you, even muttered or in passing.

People are rude, selfish and ungrateful. Not surprised in the least.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she texted you and it didn’t go through. Maybe she is sending you a written thank you note or a gift basket. For the person who took their son to a store to pick out a present for the trip, the last thing I would want someone going on a trip with me to do is go to a store. But then I wouldn’t be traveling with someone outside my household, or traveling. Frankly during this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why did you feel the need to overexplain to us about your bubble and mask wearing practices? No one cares. That was REALLY weird.

Uh, because Florida is a disaster and OP wanted the thread to be focused on the issue with her friend, rather than getting derailed by multiple comments like "omg you traveled" and "but are you wearing masks??".

Wasn't weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you do everything in life because you expect to be thanked for it?

Thanking someone is common courtesy. Everyone should do it when someone does something nice for them, or their kids. Bet you don’t write thank you notes, either.

[Anonymous]

I knew people would jump on the OP for expecting a thank you.

Of course it's not the reason you do things, but seriously? It's not too much to expect. At all. I say that as someone who has a beach house and has responded to multiple threads on DCUM indicating that I don't expect any kind of hostess gift whatsoever when friends stay there. But two simple words? Yeah, I do expect those, FFS.

[Anonymous]

I hear you, OP. It's Manners 101 to thank someone. If it were me I would have sent my kid with lots of spending money to treat your kid and also thanked you with a gift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. Also, I have another son so my kids would have been fine without him coming along....he did add some variety to the weekend and my kids both love him, but I do not think I need to thank her for the gift of her son's company for mine.

There are people who believe that gracing others with their presence is a gift and deserves no thanks. That is probably where this woman was coming from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She may be figuring out what to send as a thank you gift/sending a note. Also, is there a similar expectation of fathers when families do something nice for their child? I know she's a friend, but i see a lot of these expectations on the mother, and often the dad gets a free pass.

If the mom is the one with the relationship with OP, it’s natural to assume that she would reach out. Dad may not have OPs number at the ready to send a thank you text.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would wait. She might have a lot of stress right now that you have no clue about.

Also...you also probably invited this kid as something for your kid...to keep him busy/happy on vacation, right? So you could conceivably thank her for letting him come so your child had more fun.

100% this. Best friend helped keep YOUR kid happy. So stop being such a petty jerk. If she is truly a friend, I would expect you to show her a little understanding. Don't you think she appreciates it? I'm sure she does.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't dissolve a friendship over this, but I agree, a thank you would be the right thing to do. OP, did the son thank you? That would be sufficient for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is dysfunction in the family that has now become visible to you.

The mother is lacking in social graces as well as basic decency. You can only imagine what kind of mother she is when no one is looking. Don't expect anything from her.

Yeah. She is clearly clubbing puppies in the backyard. FFS.