I was an AP and now I'm a wife, AMA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you embarrassed that your relationship started as an affair? What did your friends and family think? were children involved?

Not at all, you can't help who you fall in love with. They didn't like it at first, but they see how happy we are together. He has one kid with his ex. We're TTC now.

You can't help who you fall in love with but you CAN help how you choose to act.

Agree. You know that a married person is off limits and you move on. You have messed up the lives of two people, neither of whom did anything to deserve to have their lives messed up. I hope you are unsuccessful at having a child. Both of you have already proved that you are morally unfit people.

Too bad OP's husband already has a child.

New question: how involved are you in the kid's life? Do you make very certain not to take on a mothering role or are you trashy like LeAnn Rimes?

[Anonymous]

op, do you realize that this forum is full of married women who are worried that someone will steal their dh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you embarrassed that your relationship started as an affair? What did your friends and family think? were children involved?

Not at all, you can't help who you fall in love with. They didn't like it at first, but they see how happy we are together. He has one kid with his ex. We're TTC now.

Yeah, that's what they say to your face because people are afraid of conflict and it would be too awkward to share with you what they tell to each other. I have a few cheaters who are friends and family, I'm pleasant to them because it's not my job to be the morality police, but my respect for them has dropped immensely.

OMG, and the play dates at these crazy family house are such a nightmare to deal with. I wish I could just say, no my kid is not allowed at your crazy house. But I just keep saying "sorry we are busy AGAIN"

+1 It was awkward enough doing playdates with the cheater dad, but at least I could tell myself that it was about our kids' friendship and I shouldn't punish a nice kid because his dad was an ass. But then dad makes a playdate, I take my kid to the house and the only adult at home is the homewrecker (of course they moved in together immediately) playing wife and mommy. So I got stuck having to answer "Who was that lady, she's not Larlo's mom, why does she live there?" and I had to figure out what to say to the ex-wife who is a very nice woman who I like a lot. Never again!

We just said no to play dates at a house with the OW ... My kids never questioned it. She comes to sports stuff, etc and it is such an embarrassment for the child. We usually let him come home with us and spend the "dad" weekends at our house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you embarrassed that your relationship started as an affair? What did your friends and family think? were children involved?

Not at all, you can't help who you fall in love with. They didn't like it at first, but they see how happy we are together. He has one kid with his ex. We're TTC now.

Yeah, that's what they say to your face because people are afraid of conflict and it would be too awkward to share with you what they tell to each other. I have a few cheaters who are friends and family, I'm pleasant to them because it's not my job to be the morality police, but my respect for them has dropped immensely.

OMG, and the play dates at these crazy family house are such a nightmare to deal with. I wish I could just say, no my kid is not allowed at your crazy house. But I just keep saying "sorry we are busy AGAIN"

+1 It was awkward enough doing playdates with the cheater dad, but at least I could tell myself that it was about our kids' friendship and I shouldn't punish a nice kid because his dad was an ass. But then dad makes a playdate, I take my kid to the house and the only adult at home is the homewrecker (of course they moved in together immediately) playing wife and mommy. So I got stuck having to answer "Who was that lady, she's not Larlo's mom, why does she live there?" and I had to figure out what to say to the ex-wife who is a very nice woman who I like a lot. Never again!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:op, do you realize that this forum is full of married women who are worried that someone will steal their dh?

I don't think they're worried that someone will stead their dh. I do think they view infidelity as wrong and wouldn't want their own children to have affairs with married people. Sometimes those views come with maturity. There are also those who never really develop the maturity to understand that we need to think of how our behavior can affect others. On a frequent basis, I see middle school kids in the counselors' offices expressing sadness and anger about having to spend weekends with the girlfriend or boyfriend of a parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:op, do you realize that this forum is full of married women who are worried that someone will steal their dh?

Oh, you must be a cheater, too. No, no concern here - if my DH wants to stray, good riddance, and he would be ten times the asshole the AP would be. But it is shitty on both their parents and I have no respect for either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long was he married before you met?

5 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How is the ex-wife taking it? I mean, do you care at all? What did this do to her life, and her kid's life? Not what he tells you, what you see for yourself.

She's moved on and dating. Their daughter is fine, she spends the weekends with us and she loves that she has two homes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:op, do you realize that this forum is full of married women who are worried that someone will steal their dh?

I don't think they're worried that someone will stead their dh. I do think they view infidelity as wrong and wouldn't want their own children to have affairs with married people. Sometimes those views come with maturity. There are also those who never really develop the maturity to understand that we need to think of how our behavior can affect others. On a frequent basis, I see middle school kids in the counselors' offices expressing sadness and anger about having to spend weekends with the girlfriend or boyfriend of a parent.

My sons best friend attacked my older son at school, they are like brothers.. After meeting with the counselor he was just so emotionally done with his dad's girlfriend, OW, he apologized for attacking my son but said it was the safest person to attack because my son would forgive him and not hit him back. So sad.

[Anonymous]

Which religious faith do you practice

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:op, do you realize that this forum is full of married women who are worried that someone will steal their dh?

A man can't be "stolen" he either wants to be with you or he doesn't. The ex didn't do anything to make him want to stay with her (no cooking, cleaning, or BJs) so she only has herself to blame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:op, do you realize that this forum is full of married women who are worried that someone will steal their dh?

It's not that. I can survive just fine without a man, or even get another. It's the fact they don't care about the kids at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is the ex-wife taking it? I mean, do you care at all? What did this do to her life, and her kid's life? Not what he tells you, what you see for yourself.

She's moved on and dating. Their daughter is fine, she spends the weekends with us and she loves that she has two homes.

People. This is a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is the ex-wife taking it? I mean, do you care at all? What did this do to her life, and her kid's life? Not what he tells you, what you see for yourself.

She's moved on and dating. Their daughter is fine, she spends the weekends with us and she loves that she has two homes.

You are wicked evil OP. Here's wishing you a lifetime of infertility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:op, do you realize that this forum is full of married women who are worried that someone will steal their dh?

A man can't be "stolen" he either wants to be with you or he doesn't. The ex didn't do anything to make him want to stay with her (no cooking, cleaning, or BJs) so she only has herself to blame.

More trolling