She was 17. He was 47. #MeToo changed how she thinks of their relationship

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's great, but I also think it's entirely possible it wasn't a predator situation. There are people (men and women) who are wonderful at age 18—they're sexually adults and completely capable of being intelligent, thoughtful, charming people.

Okay, so I can't think of any 17 or 18yo that I can stand to spend more than 3 minutes with, but her kvetching about this, especially because they apparently were married for decades long after she was inappropriately young, makes this feel more like an attention grab than a serious concern.

I'd almost believe you if he was 17 or 18 himself. But a 47 year old man who pursues a 17 year old girl will always be a predator in my mind. What could they possibly have in common?

She sounds like an incredibly unappealing person in general, so I can't answer that. But they did stay married for a long time, so clearly there was something else going on besides an interest in 17yos.

Totally irrelevant and a matter of your opinion. She was still 17 and he was 47. Just because you marry your victim doesn't make it right.

Same goes for Celene Dion and Rene. She was 12 when she met him nad he was 38 and married, but they supposedly waited until she was of age to start dating. They were also married for a long time. It doesn't make him any less of a predator. Just sick stuff.

Also, the PP asked what they could possibly have in common and I replied that I couldn't answer that. So, not sure what you're so worked up about.

That you're treating this relationship like no big deal and trying to normalize this kind of behavior from adult, middle aged, predatory men. I'll answer for you a great deal of certainty that a 17 year old girl and 47 year old man have VERY little in common. She barely started her life, has little education, no work experience, no relationship experience, and he has lived more than half his life. So please, spare me the "oh I don't know, it could be fine." It's not. It's just not. You wouldn't let your 17 year old daughter marry a 47 year old man so what are you driving at?

I wouldn't let my 17yo marry anyone. Would you?

Absolutely not. That is my point. But especially a 47 year old.

You've really lost me as to what your point is.

I know, dear. Just stay away from young girls.

Why would I go near young girls? Is this about Celine Dion?

You're a troll and probably a preditor yourself since you see nothing wrong with this.

Oh, I see lots wrong with it. I think it's downright weird. I just don't think it's as predatory as she's making it out to be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Goodness, you could frenchbraid her armpits.

Yeah, I noticed that too

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Losers in life find each other.
He cheated on his wife and kids with a 17yo!!! What a immoral mess. She was preyed upon, but still an idiot for then shacking up with him.
Whole thing is gross.

She was 17!!!!!!!

She still had a brain.

Why did she move in with him?

I’m not sure I buy these victim stories from older teens. When I was 17, guys in their 20s hit on me all the time. I didn’t move in with them.

Yes, he was a creep, but she went along with it.

Did you even listen to the whole episode?

Her father was mentally ill and like autistic, left the family. She had no father figure in her life.

Her divorced mother was dating a married man. Her mom's best friend was also dating a married man. All while she was a teen girl. So this was absolutely normalized for her as an acceptable relationship - that's incredibly damaging to a young woman's psyche.

My big question that they did not address - what happened to his biological children? Did they have a relationship with her? Did the father never speak with them again? It was only in hindsight as she matured into an adult that she realized that she ruined another family.

At least she had the sense to not bring children into the world.

Yes I wonder that too. Where are his children in all of this? Not a word of empathy for what she put them through...

It sounds like he was a lousy dad before this came along. He was a serial philanderer.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Goodness, you could frenchbraid her armpits.

Yeah, I noticed that too

Pretty sure that photo is 40+ years old. She was an artist in the 1970s, that's what they did.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Goodness, you could frenchbraid her armpits.

Yeah, I noticed that too

Pretty sure that photo is 40+ years old. She was an artist in the 1970s, that's what they did.

They also dated people of hugely different ages.

[Anonymous]

Weird that people are saying she's "insufferable." I didn't find her that way at all.

She reexamined her entire life and realized that she had been blowing smoke up everyone's butt - including her own - about the nature of their marriage. All to protect her pervy husband's ego and reputation.

I think there's an important message in here for both young women and older men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Weird that people are saying she's "insufferable." I didn't find her that way at all.

She reexamined her entire life and realized that she had been blowing smoke up everyone's butt - including her own - about the nature of their marriage. All to protect her pervy husband's ego and reputation.

I think there's an important message in here for both young women and older men.

Read the nyt piece as well - she says it was about protecting herself from judgement as well.

She just comes across as someone who, rather immaturely pursued an older man for the thrill/fame, didn’t pick up on his problematic behavior, spent 40 years, considering herself an equal in the relationship, reaped enormous benefits and now is trying to milk the whole relationship a bit more now that there’s something to be gained from complaining about it.

He sounds super awful but also someone who would very much approve of her running this scam.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Weird that people are saying she's "insufferable." I didn't find her that way at all.

She reexamined her entire life and realized that she had been blowing smoke up everyone's butt - including her own - about the nature of their marriage. All to protect her pervy husband's ego and reputation.

I think there's an important message in here for both young women and older men.

Read the nyt piece as well - she says it was about protecting herself from judgement as well.

She just comes across as someone who, rather immaturely pursued an older man for the thrill/fame, didn’t pick up on his problematic behavior, spent 40 years, considering herself an equal in the relationship, reaped enormous benefits and now is trying to milk the whole relationship a bit more now that there’s something to be gained from complaining about it.

He sounds super awful but also someone who would very much approve of her running this scam.

Uh what enormous benefits? She admits in the interview that her husband's career as an artist was a dud. She all but calls him a dilettante. There is no benefit to being the caretaker nurse for an aging husband 30 years her senior. She was a 17 year-old who was in desperate need of a therapist. She craved attention and security, which is why she continued with him for 45 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Weird that people are saying she's "insufferable." I didn't find her that way at all.

She reexamined her entire life and realized that she had been blowing smoke up everyone's butt - including her own - about the nature of their marriage. All to protect her pervy husband's ego and reputation.

I think there's an important message in here for both young women and older men.

Read the nyt piece as well - she says it was about protecting herself from judgement as well.

She just comes across as someone who, rather immaturely pursued an older man for the thrill/fame, didn’t pick up on his problematic behavior, spent 40 years, considering herself an equal in the relationship, reaped enormous benefits and now is trying to milk the whole relationship a bit more now that there’s something to be gained from complaining about it.

He sounds super awful but also someone who would very much approve of her running this scam.

Uh what enormous benefits? She admits in the interview that her husband's career as an artist was a dud. She all but calls him a dilettante. There is no benefit to being the caretaker nurse for an aging husband 30 years her senior. She was a 17 year-old who was in desperate need of a therapist. She craved attention and security, which is why she continued with him for 45 years.

He was a prominent artist, go read his obit if you want to know more about him. She got a bunch of successful books out of it. She wants another.

Both of them sound repulsive, for different reasons.

[Anonymous]

Haha love Terry Gross. Such good questions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My grandmother was 15 when she married my grandfather who was in his 20s. Arranged marriage. To this day, my family acts like her being married at 15 and birthing 7 children was a love story.

Situation u described is vastly different from what op posted. I bet u would be perfectly okay with a 15 yr old fornicating, but once that 15 yr old decides not to live in sin, u will have a problem with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Weird that people are saying she's "insufferable." I didn't find her that way at all.

She reexamined her entire life and realized that she had been blowing smoke up everyone's butt - including her own - about the nature of their marriage. All to protect her pervy husband's ego and reputation.

I think there's an important message in here for both young women and older men.

The same thing happened to that poor boy that married his teacher it took him about 20 years to realize he had been manipulated and abused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My grandmother was 15 when she married my grandfather who was in his 20s. Arranged marriage. To this day, my family acts like her being married at 15 and birthing 7 children was a love story.

Situation u described is vastly different from what op posted. I bet u would be perfectly okay with a 15 yr old fornicating, but once that 15 yr old decides not to live in sin, u will have a problem with it.

I'm not that person, but you're clearly the one with predatory tendencies. Probably some creepy MAGA in one of those states legalizing old (white) men marrying 12yos. Like you think the rest of us are disgusting like you that we're simply fine with a 15yo having sex with a 40yo as long as they're not married.

Don't project your predatory beliefs onto the rest of us and thinking a "ring" is the problem.

[Anonymous]

Why is everyone blaming the man? This woman was also a willing participant until she decided to rewrite history.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone blaming the man? This woman was also a willing participant until she decided to rewrite history.

She was a minor and he was 47. It's not rocket science.