Boyfriend and I have been arguing and I asked for a break; he's immediately out dating other women

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well in case anyone cares he's now texted me from the date and attempted to call me. When I texted him back he just wanted to argue again. Anyway, it's probably for the best that this has happened. It certainly makes moving on easier for me

How old are you guys?

This seems very juvenile.

[Anonymous]

"I always wonder why people say they can’t meet people in real life. Maybe they are in the wrong city."

OMG, How old are you now? I'm guessing at least 40. The thing is that even in Boston and NYC there are not dozens and dozens of places filled with single people ages 40-70 congregating each night. And none of us are as carefree and hot as we were in our twenties by this age either, so we're not putting out that vibe even if we can keep our eyes open till midnight on a weekday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A break is a breakup. You can't have it both ways.

Is this Rachel from Friends?

YOU WERE ON A BREAK!

Although OP sounds about 20 years too young to get the reference.

He's a child, you're a child. Leave him and find someone who is less of a douche. Yes, he had every right to do whatever he wanted but it's trashy to post it on social media. Why would you want to be with someone like that? It's so gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He either had this person on the line already while you were dating, or he ran out of your argument and asked out a stranger to rub your face in it.

I don't think I'd want to date either of those men, but you seem to have a very dramatic lifestyle so maybe this is fun for you.

He has a lot of girls who are interested in him, back from his days of being a partier and on the social scene. Some of them still message him, tag him in their stories, etc, but since we spend all our time together it doesnt usually bother me as I know he's with me. It was easy for him to get this woman out on a date, as I knew it would be, because he has a long list of these kind of "groupie" women who are obsessed with him. I just didn't expect him to actually go through with it. I dont care about these girls, I DO care about his disloyalty.

He’s not disloyal YOU BROKE UP WITH HIM!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He either had this person on the line already while you were dating, or he ran out of your argument and asked out a stranger to rub your face in it.

I don't think I'd want to date either of those men, but you seem to have a very dramatic lifestyle so maybe this is fun for you.

No. OP sounds like my ex-gf. When she did that to me, I re-joined Hinge that night and was dating in a few days and I was in bed with a beautiful young lady two weeks after the breakup. Took me a year to find a permanent gf.

I said he either ran out of the argument and asked out a stranger, and you say "No. . . I re-joined Hinge that night" - those are the same thing, sir. Identical, even.

I just posted that I dated someone when I was on a break but eventually married Dh.

I used to use new guys to cope with being hurt. In hindsight, it was probably a bad way to deal with heartache. Some girls cry, starve, binge eat, work out. I would go out with a new guy. This was before dating apps. I always had guys asking me out or guy friends. I would go out with friends and if I met a new cute guy, I would agree to go out on a date. This was back in Boston and nyc in my twenties so if you went out on any given day, I may meet tens of decent guys on any day.

I always wonder why people say they can’t meet people in real life. Maybe they are in the wrong city.

Well you seem to have a really low bar when it comes to men, so it's not surprising that you could find them anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A break is a break

And 10/10 he’s just trying to get back at you

Don’t feed into it, asking for a break is the first steps of an official break up.

If that’s not what you wanted then I wouldn’t of threatened it.

I view a break as a time to pause and think about things. I didnt even want an official "break" just for my own space back so he wouldnt be in my tiny apartment for a few nights.

Did you use your words to explain that? Did you discuss what “break” would mean? Sounds to me that if he’s not in your apartment, he’s in someone else’s pants, so maybe that tells you all you need to know.

The fighting is indicative of something, the fact he went out with someone right away tells even more. You actually want this kind of guy as a boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He’s showing you his true colors. Move on!

This. The relationship is over. Have some pride.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
And what were you expecting, exactly?

Not for him to be banging some other woman and rubbing it in my face less than a day later.

It's over.

He said he would not sleep with them to try to string you along as a backup plan.

Do you have kids? You sound really immature.

It was not working out. Now it's over. Some guys try to provoke you into calling quits, still over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He either had this person on the line already while you were dating, or he ran out of your argument and asked out a stranger to rub your face in it.

I don't think I'd want to date either of those men, but you seem to have a very dramatic lifestyle so maybe this is fun for you.

He has a lot of girls who are interested in him, back from his days of being a partier and on the social scene. Some of them still message him, tag him in their stories, etc, but since we spend all our time together it doesnt usually bother me as I know he's with me. It was easy for him to get this woman out on a date, as I knew it would be, because he has a long list of these kind of "groupie" women who are obsessed with him. I just didn't expect him to actually go through with it. I dont care about these girls, I DO care about his disloyalty.

Ad you age and mature you will get to the point where this kind of behavior will repulse rather than thrill you. Any man still being tagged by what you can his groupies is not truly ready to be in a committed, adult relationship. You DID know this would be his MO. You were just too dazzled by having “caught” the guy that every other girl wants, and unfortunately you’re now living the hard reality that it was all a facade.

Not to beat up on you too much though. I was you 20 years ago until it all started to truly disgust me and I went for the man who majored in character and minored in looks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've been arguing a LOT lately and eventually I asked for some space and said I wanted to have a bit of a break. He sleeps over at my place every night and I wanted some time off and to be able to think on my own and get away from him. He's out with another girl tonight and posted it on his social media (she tagged him in a story and he reposted it). It's embarrassing that our mutual friends will see it and obviously it bothers me that he may sleep with these other girls. He is attractive and gets lots of female attention and he basically told me that if we went on a break he would go see other women but told me he wouldnt sleep with them. I feel like this is really outrageous and disgusting behavior. He also blocked me after our last argument when I asked for a break, so i feel like the whole distance is his fault as well.

Good riddance

He sounds like a juvenile loser who can’t verbal communicate so turns everything into an argument or storms off.

Cut bait and don’t bother explaining or trying again with this underdeveloped boy.

[Anonymous]

you asked for a break. he told you if that is what you wanted, he would go out with other women.

you accepted that. he did exactly what he told you he was going to do.

now you are pissed. But you are pissed at the wrong person. Be pissed at yourself for handling this so immaturely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A break is a break

And 10/10 he’s just trying to get back at you

Don’t feed into it, asking for a break is the first steps of an official break up.

If that’s not what you wanted then I wouldn’t of threatened it.

I view a break as a time to pause and think about things. I didnt even want an official "break" just for my own space back so he wouldnt be in my tiny apartment for a few nights.

If you can’t ask him to spend two nights at his own place without him running to date other women, he is not a good man. And he was clearly using his alleged popularity/attractiveness to “so many girls” to make you feel lucky to have him - ICK!

Yeah. She did not ask for two nights at his own place. She asked for a break. Break means breakup. Most would not trust someone again who asked for a break. Break is the first step to being done. He just said fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He either had this person on the line already while you were dating, or he ran out of your argument and asked out a stranger to rub your face in it.

I don't think I'd want to date either of those men, but you seem to have a very dramatic lifestyle so maybe this is fun for you.

He has a lot of girls who are interested in him, back from his days of being a partier and on the social scene. Some of them still message him, tag him in their stories, etc, but since we spend all our time together it doesnt usually bother me as I know he's with me. It was easy for him to get this woman out on a date, as I knew it would be, because he has a long list of these kind of "groupie" women who are obsessed with him. I just didn't expect him to actually go through with it. I dont care about these girls, I DO care about his disloyalty.

He’s not disloyal YOU BROKE UP WITH HIM!

x 1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You asked for a break and he told you he would spend time with other women. I’m sure seeing the post of him out with someone else hurts, but I have no doubt your insistence on a break hurt him first.

Time to move on.

This. The other woman is a direct result of the hurt from the break.

[Anonymous]

DTMFer