What distinguishes an "average woman" from an "above average" woman for dating and marriage

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am thin and cute, I was able to pull many high-value guys for dates but they did not want to keep me around. I am sort of deadpan, serious and not bubbly at all...a coworker described me as "aloof". I really believe men want HAPPY, SMILING women and I feel like that matters even more than looks.

To be fair looks fade or lose importance in a marriage but happiness and niceness last longer and make life's journey easier. This goes for both genders.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I see this referenced here a lot, especially in regards to high value men. Can anyone elaborate?

Family: Emotionally and financially stable family with no racism, addiction, bankruptcy, debt, legal issues. Good marital and parenting role models.

Person: Emotionally stable. Interest in sex. Well educated and well employed. Good nature and good ethics. No serious prior relationship baggage. Decent social and financial skills. No debt. No addiction. Interest and ability for parenting. Good communication skills. Even temper. Basic home running skills, at least knowing how to delegate and organize work.

Not necessarily in that order.

I am sure you will find that. A perfect family of origin.

This is pretty basic.

If my parents had to file for bankruptcy at some point in their lives what does that have to do with me and what does that mean about my ability to manage finances? Absolutely nothing b/c I am a separate person from my parents.

It doesn't mean looking at IRS records of last 50 years but basic financial responsibility. Kids often inherit lifestyle decisions and often have to rescue parents and siblings which effects lives of tveir spouses and kids.

I think looking at a parent's financial decisions is a terrible, terrible way to assess financial stability. My husband and I had a ton of conversations about spending and saving and we were both knowledgable about basic principles of personal finance. We even set a monthly dating budget (cash in a white envelope, good times). My mom does happen to be a financial disaster but we really haven't spent a ton to help her out and finances have never been a source of tension in our marriage.

[Anonymous]

I’ll be an outlier and say social skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see this referenced here a lot, especially in regards to high value men. Can anyone elaborate?

Family: Emotionally and financially stable family with no racism, addiction, bankruptcy, debt, legal issues. Good marital and parenting role models.

Person: Emotionally stable. Interest in sex. Well educated and well employed. Good nature and good ethics. No serious prior relationship baggage. Decent social and financial skills. No debt. No addiction. Interest and ability for parenting. Good communication skills. Even temper. Basic home running skills, at least knowing how to delegate and organize work.

Not necessarily in that order.

I am sure you will find that. A perfect family of origin.

This is pretty basic.

If my parents had to file for bankruptcy at some point in their lives what does that have to do with me and what does that mean about my ability to manage finances? Absolutely nothing b/c I am a separate person from my parents.

It doesn't mean looking at IRS records of last 50 years but basic financial responsibility. Kids often inherit lifestyle decisions and often have to rescue parents and siblings which effects lives of tveir spouses and kids.

You are just making stuff up. Where is the data to back that statement up? And no your personal stories don't count or the stories of your friends and relatives. I got to get off DCUM and stick to Reddit. At least in Reddit when people make stuff up they do so in a more creative manner.

[Anonymous]

For starters, anyone who describes another human as "high value" or "low value" is worth avoiding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man and I just want to clear up the common misconception on this forum that the only thing men care about is looks. If I were single, my priorities would be (1) kindness, (2) emotional maturity, (3) similar values, (4) sexual compatibility, (5) attractiveness. So looks round out the top 5, but they're hardly the most important thing, and the other stuff is significantly more important.

So you married a whale?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a lot of high quality suitors when I was single and in my twenties.

I am naturally thin with large breasts. I have a pretty face, nice legs and great hair. I’m ivy educated. I always look polished. I wasn’t the prettiest but I was able to attract and more importantly keep the guys. I’m pleasant and a good conversationalist.

So if you are pretty, nice figure, smart and well educated, you are a good catch.

For being ivy educated you sound dumb and vapid. No such thing as naturally thin. My naturally thin cousin from a pedestrian friendly country left with a belly after all the American food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a lot of high quality suitors when I was single and in my twenties.

I am naturally thin with large breasts. I have a pretty face, nice legs and great hair. I’m ivy educated. I always look polished. I wasn’t the prettiest but I was able to attract and more importantly keep the guys. I’m pleasant and a good conversationalist.

So if you are pretty, nice figure, smart and well educated, you are a good catch.

For being ivy educated you sound dumb and vapid. No such thing as naturally thin. My naturally thin cousin from a pedestrian friendly country left with a belly after all the American food.

My entire extended family is thin. The majority of my parents’ country of origin is thin. It is possible to be naturally thin. I am almost 50 and still weigh 125 pounds.

The thread is about above average women. Being pretty, thin, big boobs, smart and confident puts you in above average. I also have an engaging personality and can get along with everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a lot of high quality suitors when I was single and in my twenties.

I am naturally thin with large breasts. I have a pretty face, nice legs and great hair. I’m ivy educated. I always look polished. I wasn’t the prettiest but I was able to attract and more importantly keep the guys. I’m pleasant and a good conversationalist.

So if you are pretty, nice figure, smart and well educated, you are a good catch.

For being ivy educated you sound dumb and vapid. No such thing as naturally thin. My naturally thin cousin from a pedestrian friendly country left with a belly after all the American food.

My entire extended family is thin. The majority of my parents’ country of origin is thin. It is possible to be naturally thin. I am almost 50 and still weigh 125 pounds.

The thread is about above average women. Being pretty, thin, big boobs, smart and confident puts you in above average. I also have an engaging personality and can get along with everyone.

So you're saying your extended family is immune to gaining any weight? Lady, do you realize how dumb that sounds?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man and I just want to clear up the common misconception on this forum that the only thing men care about is looks. If I were single, my priorities would be (1) kindness, (2) emotional maturity, (3) similar values, (4) sexual compatibility, (5) attractiveness. So looks round out the top 5, but they're hardly the most important thing, and the other stuff is significantly more important.

So you married a whale?

At least he married someone. I'd bet anything you're still alone and miserable.

I see you're the one he married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HVW has/can:
above average looks
above average style for herself and her house
advanced/terminal degree
high salary job
talk to anyone about anything
intelligence and curiosity
follow through on tasks and activities

I will add -
-Emotional intelligence
-A good reputation
-From a good family with little childhood trauma
-Maturity
-Self worth

[Anonymous]

What do you do if you meet intellectual and emotional requirements but are short and do not have a pretty face?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man and I just want to clear up the common misconception on this forum that the only thing men care about is looks. If I were single, my priorities would be (1) kindness, (2) emotional maturity, (3) similar values, (4) sexual compatibility, (5) attractiveness. So looks round out the top 5, but they're hardly the most important thing, and the other stuff is significantly more important.

So you married a whale?

At least he married someone. I'd bet anything you're still alone and miserable.

I see you're the one he married.

Oh, you mean the whale?

Let me know how your search is going. Not having any luck I bet. Poor you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see this referenced here a lot, especially in regards to high value men. Can anyone elaborate?

Family: Emotionally and financially stable family with no racism, addiction, bankruptcy, debt, legal issues. Good marital and parenting role models.

Person: Emotionally stable. Interest in sex. Well educated and well employed. Good nature and good ethics. No serious prior relationship baggage. Decent social and financial skills. No debt. No addiction. Interest and ability for parenting. Good communication skills. Even temper. Basic home running skills, at least knowing how to delegate and organize work.

Not necessarily in that order.

I mean, according to this I'd say 90% of people are going to feel high value.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you do if you meet intellectual and emotional requirements but are short and do not have a pretty face?

The pretty is a hook. You have to have it to at least SOME extent in order to allow the rest of your qualities to shine.