Brother in law sharing salary of niece, bragging?

[Anonymous]

Why do people get a case of the vapors when salaries are discussed among close family members?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do people get a case of the vapors when salaries are discussed among close family members?

Because OP's kids make less and she's jealous.

[Anonymous]

This is not BIL’s information to share! Totally inappropriate. I didn’t share test scores or GPA either. Share your own crap (salary and medical information like enlarged prostate) with your family and friends, but NEVER your kids info.

[Anonymous]

She's jealous. Deleting my comment proves there are a lot of jelaous aunts in here.

[Anonymous]

My brother and I discuss salary all the time. He's actually sent me his employment contracts to review, and he asks me how my business is doing. Just yesterday, he told me about a potential referral bonus he was going to get.

Why is this an issue between siblings? Jesus. If you cannot discuss salaries with your nearest and dearest who can you share things with?

Note, I don't bring this up with my sister in law. Just my brother. I have no idea what he tells her.

[Anonymous]

It’s fine to talk to your brother about his salary. He shouldn’t talk about his child’s salary without their permission.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How ridiculous. It would still be bragging if he just said she got a good job with a good salary. Knowing the number doesn’t make it bragging.

Honestly I think it’s fine to brag about your kids to your siblings. I do it with my siblings and vice versa.

Disagree. Giving the number is exactly what makes it classless. There’s no issue of salary transparency for pay equity in this scenario, so don’t give me that line. My sister was excited when both of her kids got their first jobs out of college, and I was excited for them, but would’ve been so incredibly weird if she shared their salaries. Same with the adult nieces and nephews on my husband’s side. Talking numbers would get you major side eyes. It’s just not done.

[Anonymous]

This is normal among siblings.

[Anonymous]

I agree with people who said it's fine to tell your brother this information!!!

Do people normally treat siblings like strangers once they leave the nest? These are your closest relatives. Frankly, even if he WAS bragging, so what. You are allowed to do that with siblings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How ridiculous. It would still be bragging if he just said she got a good job with a good salary. Knowing the number doesn’t make it bragging.

Honestly I think it’s fine to brag about your kids to your siblings. I do it with my siblings and vice versa.

Disagree. Giving the number is exactly what makes it classless. There’s no issue of salary transparency for pay equity in this scenario, so don’t give me that line. My sister was excited when both of her kids got their first jobs out of college, and I was excited for them, but would’ve been so incredibly weird if she shared their salaries. Same with the adult nieces and nephews on my husband’s side. Talking numbers would get you major side eyes. It’s just not done.

Does it now

I'm rolling my eyes at how tiresome you are.

[Anonymous]

My mom shared my starting salary with my aunt and I was very upset. Fifteen years later, I still think she was wrong. I have never told her my mom the salary again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom shared my starting salary with my aunt and I was very upset. Fifteen years later, I still think she was wrong. I have never told her my mom the salary again.

Why? We’re you embarrassed? I truly wish to understand why it should be secret. These days anyone can guesstimate your salary on Glassdoor.

[Anonymous]

Some of you are so uptight with your families…Christmas must be a blast at your homes.

[Anonymous]

My grandfather was an old school slide rule engineer. Retired in 1975 at probably 26k. He asked what I was making as a new engineer in the mid 1990s and then got super angry. Like who did I think I was to be making $56,000?

[Anonymous]

My wealthy parents raised us to never speak of salaries - back in the day, that was super gauche. People who shared that information were seen as lacking class.

However, that probably led to a lot of salary disparities, so I think in the right context, salary transparency can be really good.

Given that this is between two brothers, I think he was just proud of his daughter. That’s sweet.