Signs a guy will ditch you after sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11:14 here again. Also in my experience, the women who really hold off tend to be not as good in bed yet think highly of their skills. Maybe it's lack of experience for holding out so much. I'm not expecting everyone to jump in the sack after the first date, but some people really hold off like they are following some imaginary rulebook.

In my view, experience does not necessarily come from a number of partners. In fact, short term sex encounters with multiple men who are only interested in quick release doesn't allow to get that experience. With my husband we got to the point when both of us were finishing at the same time, each time we had sex! I was never able to reach it with just dates.

My experience is that men who are mostly interested in sex are actually pretty poor performers in bed: only think about themselves, rushed, limited to standard sex options etc.

It could be that women who make a big deal out of waiting also have some hang-ups about it, perhaps subconscious, and that affects their abilit to feel free and enjoy it/perform well.

I am such a women and it is because a) I get attached (can only sleep w one guy at a time) and b) sex with trust and connection is infinitely better and worth waiting for—I am an animal with someone I love and trust.

SAME. Casual sex has been underwhelming in my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Sorry, OP. I am sure I'm going to be flamed for this but it's the truth. I am a guy dating so take it with a grain of salt. All the posts about waiting for 3 months are BS. You do you. Based on my opinion and experience, you're not building anticipation or desire by waiting. For me, a relationship has to have both the mental and physical connection to be in sync to pursue further. If the physical connection is not there, it's just not going to work out. You don't want to wait for 3 months and be mentally attracted and then get behind closed doors and find out that the guy is a dud (or from a guy's perspective, you are a dud). Also, I've learned the hard way, that the longer a woman takes to get physical, there are major insecurities that she's dealing with, and/or, just enjoys the free meal because some guys will keep going back to get something that is not available to them.

Wasted time.

As a guy, a woman who is just as interested in a relationship as she is in sex versus a woman who is going to "wait" for some dumb timeline for sex, separates herself from the pack. We will always go for the sexually confident woman. And twice on Sunday. Those who will turn it on when they decide that this is the guy she wants to be with, good for them. If I'm interested in someone, I want to know if we're sexually compatible. Because I don't want to waste my time and money courting someone who is not going to be fun behind closed doors. And when we find someone who is fun, we go back and back for more. We don't ditch them to start the chase all over again.

Maybe (and this is harsh), you're not good at sex. There are no signs that a man will lose interest after sex. On the contrary, speaking for myself, I'm more interested in someone if the sex was good. If you're into it, men will know. If you're doing it just because you have to, we will know as well, and we will not be coming back for more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Sorry, OP. I am sure I'm going to be flamed for this but it's the truth. I am a guy dating so take it with a grain of salt. All the posts about waiting for 3 months are BS. You do you. Based on my opinion and experience, you're not building anticipation or desire by waiting. For me, a relationship has to have both the mental and physical connection to be in sync to pursue further. If the physical connection is not there, it's just not going to work out. You don't want to wait for 3 months and be mentally attracted and then get behind closed doors and find out that the guy is a dud (or from a guy's perspective, you are a dud). Also, I've learned the hard way, that the longer a woman takes to get physical, there are major insecurities that she's dealing with, and/or, just enjoys the free meal because some guys will keep going back to get something that is not available to them.

Wasted time.

As a guy, a woman who is just as interested in a relationship as she is in sex versus a woman who is going to "wait" for some dumb timeline for sex, separates herself from the pack. We will always go for the sexually confident woman. And twice on Sunday. Those who will turn it on when they decide that this is the guy she wants to be with, good for them. If I'm interested in someone, I want to know if we're sexually compatible. Because I don't want to waste my time and money courting someone who is not going to be fun behind closed doors. And when we find someone who is fun, we go back and back for more. We don't ditch them to start the chase all over again.

Maybe (and this is harsh), you're not good at sex. There are no signs that a man will lose interest after sex. On the contrary, speaking for myself, I'm more interested in someone if the sex was good. If you're into it, men will know. If you're doing it just because you have to, we will know as well, and we will not be coming back for more.

Another man here. This is excellent advice. I've also had it go the other way -- sex was good, but the intellectual side faded over time. You want to get both figured out within a few dates -- no waiting 3 months. Life is too short.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the two male posters above, but also there is the possibility they are more interested in someone else and have chosen to go that route vs. keep having sex with you. It may not be that OP was bad in bed, just that she isn't his preferred choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11:14 here again. Also in my experience, the women who really hold off tend to be not as good in bed yet think highly of their skills. Maybe it's lack of experience for holding out so much. I'm not expecting everyone to jump in the sack after the first date, but some people really hold off like they are following some imaginary rulebook.

In my view, experience does not necessarily come from a number of partners. In fact, short term sex encounters with multiple men who are only interested in quick release doesn't allow to get that experience. With my husband we got to the point when both of us were finishing at the same time, each time we had sex! I was never able to reach it with just dates.

My experience is that men who are mostly interested in sex are actually pretty poor performers in bed: only think about themselves, rushed, limited to standard sex options etc.

It could be that women who make a big deal out of waiting also have some hang-ups about it, perhaps subconscious, and that affects their abilit to feel free and enjoy it/perform well.

I am such a women and it is because a) I get attached (can only sleep w one guy at a time) and b) sex with trust and connection is infinitely better and worth waiting for—I am an animal with someone I love and trust.

SAME. Casual sex has been underwhelming in my experience.

+1,000

[Anonymous]

I agree that waiting an arbitrary time for sex is too long. If it’s working it’s working. If it’s not it’s not. There’s no hard and fast rule, it’s whether both people are compatible and like each other and are comfortable with sex. My own DH would never have waited three months.

[Anonymous]

When you have a ring on your finger, the guy is sincere. Don't give up the sex until you have a ring on your finger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Where did you have sex, at his house or somewhere else? In my experience men looking for casual sex won't be introducing you to friends, family or bring sexual partner to his house. And even if they do, they would expect you to be "on call" driving to his house whenever he wants "a date".

Try next time to stretch it into 3 months, short termers usually loose patience if no sex happens with a few weeks

Lol, you think a guy that is desirable to women (even one open to, or looking for, monogamy) is going to wait 3 months for sex??

Absolutely yes, he would wait if the woman is very desirable to him.

And he has no other options on hand

He will have sex with "other options" until the desirable woman becomes available after a long term investment. OK for me as long as I am the desirable one.

+100. Men absolutely will wait for what they want. Better to be the woman he waits for than the low hanging fruit bench rider/slump buster he sleeps with just because they’re available.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you have a ring on your finger, the guy is sincere. Don't give up the sex until you have a ring on your finger.

+1,000,000. This is the real answer nobody likes to hear, but it’s true!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you have a ring on your finger, the guy is sincere. Don't give up the sex until you have a ring on your finger.

Why would I get engaged to a woman who doesn’t already have enthusiastic sex with me?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Sorry, OP. I am sure I'm going to be flamed for this but it's the truth. I am a guy dating so take it with a grain of salt. All the posts about waiting for 3 months are BS. You do you. Based on my opinion and experience, you're not building anticipation or desire by waiting. For me, a relationship has to have both the mental and physical connection to be in sync to pursue further. If the physical connection is not there, it's just not going to work out. You don't want to wait for 3 months and be mentally attracted and then get behind closed doors and find out that the guy is a dud (or from a guy's perspective, you are a dud). Also, I've learned the hard way, that the longer a woman takes to get physical, there are major insecurities that she's dealing with, and/or, just enjoys the free meal because some guys will keep going back to get something that is not available to them.

Wasted time.

As a guy, a woman who is just as interested in a relationship as she is in sex versus a woman who is going to "wait" for some dumb timeline for sex, separates herself from the pack. We will always go for the sexually confident woman. And twice on Sunday. Those who will turn it on when they decide that this is the guy she wants to be with, good for them. If I'm interested in someone, I want to know if we're sexually compatible. Because I don't want to waste my time and money courting someone who is not going to be fun behind closed doors. And when we find someone who is fun, we go back and back for more. We don't ditch them to start the chase all over again.

Maybe (and this is harsh), you're not good at sex. There are no signs that a man will lose interest after sex. On the contrary, speaking for myself, I'm more interested in someone if the sex was good. If you're into it, men will know. If you're doing it just because you have to, we will know as well, and we will not be coming back for more.

I'm not surprised you are single. You are a jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When you have a ring on your finger, the guy is sincere. Don't give up the sex until you have a ring on your finger.

Why would I get engaged to a woman who doesn’t already have enthusiastic sex with me?

jersey.

I got news for you buddy. If you marry and think your wife is going to be enthusiastic for sex all the time you are delusional. Hot sex is shaky foundation to base a marriage on, your own d1ck will lose enthusiasm one day too. You will be better off finding a partner who has good character and compatibility for the long haul vs someone who is horny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Sorry, OP. I am sure I'm going to be flamed for this but it's the truth. I am a guy dating so take it with a grain of salt. All the posts about waiting for 3 months are BS. You do you. Based on my opinion and experience, you're not building anticipation or desire by waiting. For me, a relationship has to have both the mental and physical connection to be in sync to pursue further. If the physical connection is not there, it's just not going to work out. You don't want to wait for 3 months and be mentally attracted and then get behind closed doors and find out that the guy is a dud (or from a guy's perspective, you are a dud). Also, I've learned the hard way, that the longer a woman takes to get physical, there are major insecurities that she's dealing with, and/or, just enjoys the free meal because some guys will keep going back to get something that is not available to them.

Wasted time.

As a guy, a woman who is just as interested in a relationship as she is in sex versus a woman who is going to "wait" for some dumb timeline for sex, separates herself from the pack. We will always go for the sexually confident woman. And twice on Sunday. Those who will turn it on when they decide that this is the guy she wants to be with, good for them. If I'm interested in someone, I want to know if we're sexually compatible. Because I don't want to waste my time and money courting someone who is not going to be fun behind closed doors. And when we find someone who is fun, we go back and back for more. We don't ditch them to start the chase all over again.

Maybe (and this is harsh), you're not good at sex. There are no signs that a man will lose interest after sex. On the contrary, speaking for myself, I'm more interested in someone if the sex was good. If you're into it, men will know. If you're doing it just because you have to, we will know as well, and we will not be coming back for more.

And how would women know that you are not just going around "trying" as many girls as possible? Honestly, sex is a no brainer, I am a woman and had O with all my partners with penetration and never just lay down. It of course varies how they like my tongue go around their penis, or what to touch during, but after couple times with same partner it's easy to learn.

Many people are compatible with each other if you just take sex alone, I would say 80% of opposite side persons I found visually attractive.

I am a woman and it's enough for me to kiss with a guy to see if his kiss and touch makes me wet wanting him and to see if kissing me is getting him hard. If it doesn't, I just don't move to next stage - PIV.

What is wrong with you men that you need to go to PIV to see if the woman is right for you???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Sorry, OP. I am sure I'm going to be flamed for this but it's the truth. I am a guy dating so take it with a grain of salt. All the posts about waiting for 3 months are BS. You do you. Based on my opinion and experience, you're not building anticipation or desire by waiting. For me, a relationship has to have both the mental and physical connection to be in sync to pursue further. If the physical connection is not there, it's just not going to work out. You don't want to wait for 3 months and be mentally attracted and then get behind closed doors and find out that the guy is a dud (or from a guy's perspective, you are a dud). Also, I've learned the hard way, that the longer a woman takes to get physical, there are major insecurities that she's dealing with, and/or, just enjoys the free meal because some guys will keep going back to get something that is not available to them.

Wasted time.

As a guy, a woman who is just as interested in a relationship as she is in sex versus a woman who is going to "wait" for some dumb timeline for sex, separates herself from the pack. We will always go for the sexually confident woman. And twice on Sunday. Those who will turn it on when they decide that this is the guy she wants to be with, good for them. If I'm interested in someone, I want to know if we're sexually compatible. Because I don't want to waste my time and money courting someone who is not going to be fun behind closed doors. And when we find someone who is fun, we go back and back for more. We don't ditch them to start the chase all over again.

Maybe (and this is harsh), you're not good at sex. There are no signs that a man will lose interest after sex. On the contrary, speaking for myself, I'm more interested in someone if the sex was good. If you're into it, men will know. If you're doing it just because you have to, we will know as well, and we will not be coming back for more.

I'm not surprised you are single. You are a jerk.

Be surprised all you want. No. I'm not single. If you can read, then you would notice that I said I am dating.

Clearly, my note hit home with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Sorry, OP. I am sure I'm going to be flamed for this but it's the truth. I am a guy dating so take it with a grain of salt. All the posts about waiting for 3 months are BS. You do you. Based on my opinion and experience, you're not building anticipation or desire by waiting. For me, a relationship has to have both the mental and physical connection to be in sync to pursue further. If the physical connection is not there, it's just not going to work out. You don't want to wait for 3 months and be mentally attracted and then get behind closed doors and find out that the guy is a dud (or from a guy's perspective, you are a dud). Also, I've learned the hard way, that the longer a woman takes to get physical, there are major insecurities that she's dealing with, and/or, just enjoys the free meal because some guys will keep going back to get something that is not available to them.

Wasted time.

As a guy, a woman who is just as interested in a relationship as she is in sex versus a woman who is going to "wait" for some dumb timeline for sex, separates herself from the pack. We will always go for the sexually confident woman. And twice on Sunday. Those who will turn it on when they decide that this is the guy she wants to be with, good for them. If I'm interested in someone, I want to know if we're sexually compatible. Because I don't want to waste my time and money courting someone who is not going to be fun behind closed doors. And when we find someone who is fun, we go back and back for more. We don't ditch them to start the chase all over again.

Maybe (and this is harsh), you're not good at sex. There are no signs that a man will lose interest after sex. On the contrary, speaking for myself, I'm more interested in someone if the sex was good. If you're into it, men will know. If you're doing it just because you have to, we will know as well, and we will not be coming back for more.

I'm not surprised you are single. You are a jerk.

Be surprised all you want. No. I'm not single. If you can read, then you would notice that I said I am dating.

Clearly, my note hit home with you.

Of course he's "dating" trying different women