Signs a guy will ditch you after sex

[Anonymous]

Man here. You could be bad at sex or changed after it.

For me, if the sex was good, I'd keep coming back again and again. Why go through a long routine with another woman that may take months, when I have good sex ready and waiting?

[Anonymous]

11:14 here again. Also in my experience, the women who really hold off tend to be not as good in bed yet think highly of their skills. Maybe it's lack of experience for holding out so much. I'm not expecting everyone to jump in the sack after the first date, but some people really hold off like they are following some imaginary rulebook.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Where did you have sex, at his house or somewhere else? In my experience men looking for casual sex won't be introducing you to friends, family or bring sexual partner to his house. And even if they do, they would expect you to be "on call" driving to his house whenever he wants "a date".

Try next time to stretch it into 3 months, short termers usually loose patience if no sex happens with a few weeks

Lol, you think a guy that is desirable to women (even one open to, or looking for, monogamy) is going to wait 3 months for sex??

Absolutely yes, he would wait if the woman is very desirable to him.

And he has no other options on hand

He will have sex with "other options" until the desirable woman becomes available after a long term investment. OK for me as long as I am the desirable one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just think it’s part of dating. You meet someone and as long as they show interest by initiating dates and conversation (texting, calls), appear respectful, try to get to know you by asking questions about your life, family, job, possibly introduce you to friends, which leads to physical intimacy, there’s not a lot of signs in advance if it will turn into a relationship. I also don’t think timing matters as much before having sex, all the men who became bfs in my life and most of my friends had sex between dates 1-5 (I personally stuck to 3). Others I waited longer but that’s because their just wasn’t this overwhelming chemistry or opportunity. Few I actually met their friends before sex. Maybe there wasn’t enough chemistry on his side after having sex, maybe he was only interested in something casual, you just don’t know so move on, date and try again. Finding the right person takes time.

I am a woman and had so many "boyfriends" with 1-4 dates! My sex partner count would be over 100 if I slept with everyone after 5th date.

My actual "count" is 3 with penetration, 7 without in a lifetime. #2 with PIV (after 2 months of dating) became my husband. Regretfully, we divorced but it was a long (18 years) marriage which I think is already a success given divorce rates etc

I’ve had 3 boyfriends and married the 3rd but way to try and sex shame women. If I only slept with 3 men (my number is 15), I would have really missed out on discovering what it means to have a sophisticated and talented partner in bed. I’m also able to contribute through experience and exploration. And yes, we probably grew up in very different generations with different expectations on women. Hopefully post-divorce you can find some talented men to blow your mind.

To OP, ignore posters than try to sex shame you or insinuate you had sex too soon or before meeting certain conditions. DCUM is full of women that love to criticize other women, there’s a lot of bitterness on this forum.

Slept with 15 men but only 3 boyfriends? Weird count. Somehow I never had a desire to look inside pants of random men who are not my boyfriends. Sex is simple enough no particular "talent" needed to develop this experience to "share" with your future husband. Particular if this is experience of having sex in a shared house with roommates. Just not flattering to me, sorry.

Babe if you think sex is looking in men's pants you def need some more experience.

[Anonymous]

OP, I’m sure you look good naked bc pretty much all women do. Intelligent guys get this. However it’s possible something in your performance or personality was a turnoff. Personally I wouldn’t do what you did after high school. If a guy can’t take you out properly he’s not worth dating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:11:14 here again. Also in my experience, the women who really hold off tend to be not as good in bed yet think highly of their skills. Maybe it's lack of experience for holding out so much. I'm not expecting everyone to jump in the sack after the first date, but some people really hold off like they are following some imaginary rulebook.

In my view, experience does not necessarily come from a number of partners. In fact, short term sex encounters with multiple men who are only interested in quick release doesn't allow to get that experience. With my husband we got to the point when both of us were finishing at the same time, each time we had sex! I was never able to reach it with just dates.

My experience is that men who are mostly interested in sex are actually pretty poor performers in bed: only think about themselves, rushed, limited to standard sex options etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11:14 here again. Also in my experience, the women who really hold off tend to be not as good in bed yet think highly of their skills. Maybe it's lack of experience for holding out so much. I'm not expecting everyone to jump in the sack after the first date, but some people really hold off like they are following some imaginary rulebook.

In my view, experience does not necessarily come from a number of partners. In fact, short term sex encounters with multiple men who are only interested in quick release doesn't allow to get that experience. With my husband we got to the point when both of us were finishing at the same time, each time we had sex! I was never able to reach it with just dates.

My experience is that men who are mostly interested in sex are actually pretty poor performers in bed: only think about themselves, rushed, limited to standard sex options etc.

It could be that women who make a big deal out of waiting also have some hang-ups about it, perhaps subconscious, and that affects their abilit to feel free and enjoy it/perform well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11:14 here again. Also in my experience, the women who really hold off tend to be not as good in bed yet think highly of their skills. Maybe it's lack of experience for holding out so much. I'm not expecting everyone to jump in the sack after the first date, but some people really hold off like they are following some imaginary rulebook.

In my view, experience does not necessarily come from a number of partners. In fact, short term sex encounters with multiple men who are only interested in quick release doesn't allow to get that experience. With my husband we got to the point when both of us were finishing at the same time, each time we had sex! I was never able to reach it with just dates.

My experience is that men who are mostly interested in sex are actually pretty poor performers in bed: only think about themselves, rushed, limited to standard sex options etc.

It could be that women who make a big deal out of waiting also have some hang-ups about it, perhaps subconscious, and that affects their abilit to feel free and enjoy it/perform well.

I am such a women and it is because a) I get attached (can only sleep w one guy at a time) and b) sex with trust and connection is infinitely better and worth waiting for—I am an animal with someone I love and trust.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just think it’s part of dating. You meet someone and as long as they show interest by initiating dates and conversation (texting, calls), appear respectful, try to get to know you by asking questions about your life, family, job, possibly introduce you to friends, which leads to physical intimacy, there’s not a lot of signs in advance if it will turn into a relationship. I also don’t think timing matters as much before having sex, all the men who became bfs in my life and most of my friends had sex between dates 1-5 (I personally stuck to 3). Others I waited longer but that’s because their just wasn’t this overwhelming chemistry or opportunity. Few I actually met their friends before sex. Maybe there wasn’t enough chemistry on his side after having sex, maybe he was only interested in something casual, you just don’t know so move on, date and try again. Finding the right person takes time.

I am a woman and had so many "boyfriends" with 1-4 dates! My sex partner count would be over 100 if I slept with everyone after 5th date.

My actual "count" is 3 with penetration, 7 without in a lifetime. #2 with PIV (after 2 months of dating) became my husband. Regretfully, we divorced but it was a long (18 years) marriage which I think is already a success given divorce rates etc

I’ve had 3 boyfriends and married the 3rd but way to try and sex shame women. If I only slept with 3 men (my number is 15), I would have really missed out on discovering what it means to have a sophisticated and talented partner in bed. I’m also able to contribute through experience and exploration. And yes, we probably grew up in very different generations with different expectations on women. Hopefully post-divorce you can find some talented men to blow your mind.

To OP, ignore posters than try to sex shame you or insinuate you had sex too soon or before meeting certain conditions. DCUM is full of women that love to criticize other women, there’s a lot of bitterness on this forum.

Slept with 15 men but only 3 boyfriends? Weird count. Somehow I never had a desire to look inside pants of random men who are not my boyfriends. Sex is simple enough no particular "talent" needed to develop this experience to "share" with your future husband. Particular if this is experience of having sex in a shared house with roommates. Just not flattering to me, sorry.

Babe if you think sex is looking in men's pants you def need some more experience.

Oh, if you mean under "sex" a variety, I am ok letting him eat me out in my car. Or even getting an O from kissing. But I won't necessarily touch or suck his penis, or let him penetrate if I don't feel like it and he's not that attractive in a wider sense to me.

You’re okay getting yourself off or having him get you off orally but won’t touch his d*ck? I think I found the problem.

I would agree to light "sexual' activities that are aimed at pleasing me as a woman but won't put his dick in my mouth until he's tested for STD and until I feel like he's attractive in more than sexual sense to me. And I will see if he was able to satisfy ME first in that lighter sexual activities. I am not a can to offload someone's random semen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Where did you have sex, at his house or somewhere else? In my experience men looking for casual sex won't be introducing you to friends, family or bring sexual partner to his house. And even if they do, they would expect you to be "on call" driving to his house whenever he wants "a date".

Try next time to stretch it into 3 months, short termers usually loose patience if no sex happens with a few weeks

I’m in my late twenties and I actually met his roommates twice. And our dates were normally during the day.

Day dates only are kind of a red flag. Who is seeing in the evenings? Particularly on the weekend nights.

+1. Also, roomates don’t count. It sounds like he brought you over to his place to have sex and you incidentally met them that way. That’s leagues different from meeting his friends in a public, social setting. If you aren’t his date to the events he attends, he only wants sex.

When a guy really likes a girl he takes her out at night 1 on 1. Agree. Only day dates signals you weren't a contender for 'real' relationship or he is dating someone else he likes better who gets the night slots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just think it’s part of dating. You meet someone and as long as they show interest by initiating dates and conversation (texting, calls), appear respectful, try to get to know you by asking questions about your life, family, job, possibly introduce you to friends, which leads to physical intimacy, there’s not a lot of signs in advance if it will turn into a relationship. I also don’t think timing matters as much before having sex, all the men who became bfs in my life and most of my friends had sex between dates 1-5 (I personally stuck to 3). Others I waited longer but that’s because their just wasn’t this overwhelming chemistry or opportunity. Few I actually met their friends before sex. Maybe there wasn’t enough chemistry on his side after having sex, maybe he was only interested in something casual, you just don’t know so move on, date and try again. Finding the right person takes time.

I am a woman and had so many "boyfriends" with 1-4 dates! My sex partner count would be over 100 if I slept with everyone after 5th date.

My actual "count" is 3 with penetration, 7 without in a lifetime. #2 with PIV (after 2 months of dating) became my husband. Regretfully, we divorced but it was a long (18 years) marriage which I think is already a success given divorce rates etc

I’ve had 3 boyfriends and married the 3rd but way to try and sex shame women. If I only slept with 3 men (my number is 15), I would have really missed out on discovering what it means to have a sophisticated and talented partner in bed. I’m also able to contribute through experience and exploration. And yes, we probably grew up in very different generations with different expectations on women. Hopefully post-divorce you can find some talented men to blow your mind.

To OP, ignore posters than try to sex shame you or insinuate you had sex too soon or before meeting certain conditions. DCUM is full of women that love to criticize other women, there’s a lot of bitterness on this forum.

Slept with 15 men but only 3 boyfriends? Weird count. Somehow I never had a desire to look inside pants of random men who are not my boyfriends. Sex is simple enough no particular "talent" needed to develop this experience to "share" with your future husband. Particular if this is experience of having sex in a shared house with roommates. Just not flattering to me, sorry.

Babe if you think sex is looking in men's pants you def need some more experience.

Oh, if you mean under "sex" a variety, I am ok letting him eat me out in my car. Or even getting an O from kissing. But I won't necessarily touch or suck his penis, or let him penetrate if I don't feel like it and he's not that attractive in a wider sense to me.

You’re okay getting yourself off or having him get you off orally but won’t touch his d*ck? I think I found the problem.

I would agree to light "sexual' activities that are aimed at pleasing me as a woman but won't put his dick in my mouth until he's tested for STD and until I feel like he's attractive in more than sexual sense to me. And I will see if he was able to satisfy ME first in that lighter sexual activities. I am not a can to offload someone's random semen.

Again, the problem is evident here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just think it’s part of dating. You meet someone and as long as they show interest by initiating dates and conversation (texting, calls), appear respectful, try to get to know you by asking questions about your life, family, job, possibly introduce you to friends, which leads to physical intimacy, there’s not a lot of signs in advance if it will turn into a relationship. I also don’t think timing matters as much before having sex, all the men who became bfs in my life and most of my friends had sex between dates 1-5 (I personally stuck to 3). Others I waited longer but that’s because their just wasn’t this overwhelming chemistry or opportunity. Few I actually met their friends before sex. Maybe there wasn’t enough chemistry on his side after having sex, maybe he was only interested in something casual, you just don’t know so move on, date and try again. Finding the right person takes time.

I am a woman and had so many "boyfriends" with 1-4 dates! My sex partner count would be over 100 if I slept with everyone after 5th date.

My actual "count" is 3 with penetration, 7 without in a lifetime. #2 with PIV (after 2 months of dating) became my husband. Regretfully, we divorced but it was a long (18 years) marriage which I think is already a success given divorce rates etc

I’ve had 3 boyfriends and married the 3rd but way to try and sex shame women. If I only slept with 3 men (my number is 15), I would have really missed out on discovering what it means to have a sophisticated and talented partner in bed. I’m also able to contribute through experience and exploration. And yes, we probably grew up in very different generations with different expectations on women. Hopefully post-divorce you can find some talented men to blow your mind.

To OP, ignore posters than try to sex shame you or insinuate you had sex too soon or before meeting certain conditions. DCUM is full of women that love to criticize other women, there’s a lot of bitterness on this forum.

Slept with 15 men but only 3 boyfriends? Weird count. Somehow I never had a desire to look inside pants of random men who are not my boyfriends. Sex is simple enough no particular "talent" needed to develop this experience to "share" with your future husband. Particular if this is experience of having sex in a shared house with roommates. Just not flattering to me, sorry.

Babe if you think sex is looking in men's pants you def need some more experience.

Oh, if you mean under "sex" a variety, I am ok letting him eat me out in my car. Or even getting an O from kissing. But I won't necessarily touch or suck his penis, or let him penetrate if I don't feel like it and he's not that attractive in a wider sense to me.

You’re okay getting yourself off or having him get you off orally but won’t touch his d*ck? I think I found the problem.

I would agree to light "sexual' activities that are aimed at pleasing me as a woman but won't put his dick in my mouth until he's tested for STD and until I feel like he's attractive in more than sexual sense to me. And I will see if he was able to satisfy ME first in that lighter sexual activities. I am not a can to offload someone's random semen.

Selfish lover. No way you're good in bed.

[Anonymous]

If a guy goes down on you you AT MINIMUM should give him a hand job. That’s just common courtesy. How do you not know this?

[Anonymous]

With your selfish attitude it’s likely you have expressed other selfish views that got you relegated to the ONS scrap heap long before he ditched you. Team ditcher. You must be awful in bed as you are a total taker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a man last year for like 6 weeks, had sex, and then he lost interest and wanted casual after previously initiating monogamy. I’m now dating again.and wondering what are signs a man will end up losing interest after sex one time?

Where did you have sex, at his house or somewhere else? In my experience men looking for casual sex won't be introducing you to friends, family or bring sexual partner to his house. And even if they do, they would expect you to be "on call" driving to his house whenever he wants "a date".

Try next time to stretch it into 3 months, short termers usually loose patience if no sex happens with a few weeks

Lol, you think a guy that is desirable to women (even one open to, or looking for, monogamy) is going to wait 3 months for sex??

Absolutely yes, he would wait if the woman is very desirable to him.

And he has no other options on hand

He will have sex with "other options" until the desirable woman becomes available after a long term investment. OK for me as long as I am the desirable one.

80% of success is showing up. You claim you won’t show up for the dating stuff for many weeks. Your plan seems flawed.