Husband -father of 4- sleeps in every single day

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also had a “sloth laying around”. It turns out my DH had a serious alcohol problem.

DH does drink every night. IPAs. How do I figure out if it’s a problem though? I’m upstairs asleep shortly after the kids… he does his late night couch routine alone.

The alcohol seems to be a big part of the problem. My DH stays up late drinking; sleeps horribly; wakes up hungover; I’m sure he sips during the day and takes naps. The cycle is never ending. Your DH has an alcohol problem period.

Yep, junk sleep.

The alcohol is his crutch/unwind and the tv-couch thing is his mini escapism from the stress of the day, work anxiety, and procrastination to get up and go to bed properly.

[Anonymous]

I'd make him do a sleep study to rule out sleep apnea. I would also keep an eye on the alcohol.

[Anonymous]

This is what I think is happening. One of these:

Alcohol issue
Girlfriend
Gamer
Porn

He’s away until 7 pm? What is he doing?

What does he do until 1 am?? He needs to go to sleep earlier and get up earlier.

[Anonymous]

my husband has high sleep needs (like he will also nap at every quiet time for two hours), but hes been getting up early to get kid/kids ready since the first was born. He also goes to bed much earlier with me at 10 so thats how hes able to get up earlier I guess. I would just throw a fit. I also used to always get up with the kids because I am more of a morning person, but I just can't do it anymore so now when I need a morning to myself (its basically just an hour or two) I just tell him and he does it. He knows its fair.

[Anonymous]

4 kids here as well. My husband wakes up at 5am every morning to get thing in before everyone wakes up. He wakes up the kids, makes the coffee for us, and gets breakfast on the table. I think he’s average.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like my DH once I started teleworking. He was always in charge of mornings - I'd go to work early and come home early so no aftercare needed. I made dinner, etc. All of the afternoon work. And it worked out great. Until I started teleworking. He started lying in bed literally until minutes before he needed to go. So I'd do all the morning stuff (at the expense of teleworking), taking the kids to school (at the expense of teleworking), then work, then do the afternoon shift and make dinner as well. Really frustrating until I pointed it out to him that I was doing all of the morning work during my work hours while he laid in bed scrolling on his phone. It makes me angry. He's very capable. But he was more than willing to let me do that work for him. He didn't even try to get up ... he'd send the kids downstairs and I'd already be working in the common area so they'd come to me for help/breakfast/getting ready to go/etc. And always something urgent at work so he didn't have the extra time to take them to school. Selfish and thoughtless.

[Anonymous]

I am the wife who’s husband did the morning routine (to be fair I literally do everything else and work until 11 most nights after bedtime). Anyway my spouse finally told me he was going to lose it from exhaustion if I didnt split morning routine so I agreed and “helps” w some other stuff. It’s great bc now we are both super exhausted all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like my DH once I started teleworking. He was always in charge of mornings - I'd go to work early and come home early so no aftercare needed. I made dinner, etc. All of the afternoon work. And it worked out great. Until I started teleworking. He started lying in bed literally until minutes before he needed to go. So I'd do all the morning stuff (at the expense of teleworking), taking the kids to school (at the expense of teleworking), then work, then do the afternoon shift and make dinner as well. Really frustrating until I pointed it out to him that I was doing all of the morning work during my work hours while he laid in bed scrolling on his phone. It makes me angry. He's very capable. But he was more than willing to let me do that work for him. He didn't even try to get up ... he'd send the kids downstairs and I'd already be working in the common area so they'd come to me for help/breakfast/getting ready to go/etc. And always something urgent at work so he didn't have the extra time to take them to school. Selfish and thoughtless.

Ughhhh so selfish! Whyyyyyy??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:4 kids here as well. My husband wakes up at 5am every morning to get thing in before everyone wakes up. He wakes up the kids, makes the coffee for us, and gets breakfast on the table. I think he’s average.

That’s so hot. I would love to have a husband like that!

[Anonymous]

Oh hell no. I’d divorce a man who wouldn’t do either pickup or drop off and alternate with me. Eff your lazy husband. I’d make him go to the doctor for blood work. Low vitamin d, low iron, low testosterone or depression. And if nothing is found, I’d threaten divorce. What a lazy human being.

Do you work? How are you able to work with such a sloth?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:4 kids here as well. My husband wakes up at 5am every morning to get thing in before everyone wakes up. He wakes up the kids, makes the coffee for us, and gets breakfast on the table. I think he’s average.

My husband also does the mornings. I worship the ground he walks on because of it.

Let me sleep and feed me, I’ll do anything you want me to.

[Anonymous]

Wow. I guess I’m glad I’m not alone. I only have 2 kids with my husband though. I volunteer once a month and he helps for that evening then. Other than that. Same situation. Complains about crappy sleep, sleeps in. I do everything myself each morning. Feels tiring.

Get through these years of you’re a sahm and then decide later how you feel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:4 kids here as well. My husband wakes up at 5am every morning to get thing in before everyone wakes up. He wakes up the kids, makes the coffee for us, and gets breakfast on the table. I think he’s average.

Does he work too?! Omg no that’s not average.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I actually have zero sympathy for anyone who has more than 2 kids.

You deserve your misery. You deserve each other.

WTF is wrong with you? Go for a walk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:4 kids here as well. My husband wakes up at 5am every morning to get thing in before everyone wakes up. He wakes up the kids, makes the coffee for us, and gets breakfast on the table. I think he’s average.

No, that isn’t average and most families don’t need to have a person up THAT early. Oh my god.