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What Do You Think of SG's No Children Allowed Policy?
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Anonymous
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I've been to and spoken to different fertility clinics now and only SG seems to forbid young children from coming into their office. I understand their reason - it was explained very nicely on one of their pamphlets - it causes tremendous pain to some of their infertile patients and they wish to be sensitive about that.
But sometimes it is hard to leave children with babysitters or nannies. Sometimes with ER and especially ET being unpredictable, it's hard to get childcare on such short notice. Some people have no family in state. Don't you think it would be better for SG to at least provide a babysitting room on the floor for those parents who must bring along young children to appts? I wonder also - to those who do feel pain or anguish upon seeing young children, how do you cope in public places such as restaurants, libraries, beaches, etc...? |
Anonymous
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Honestly, I'm not for it. I had my dad watch my 21 month old daughter for me while I had my ER. He of course had to go back home and come back because no kids were allowed inside. After my ER, the nurse told me that someone had to meet me inside to take me home and I explained to her that he couldn't because he's watching my 21 months old daughter. Well since it was the weekend and the cliinic was not that busy, they gave him permission to bring her in. Unreal....
I had no problem a few years ago when I saw a patient bring in her 4 kids even though you weren't allowed. Just made me smile. 
I mean...there are babies/toddlers/kids were ever you go. It's reality! Deal with it!!! |
Anonymous
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I am in favor of the SG policy and I understand the reason behind it. Obviously, patients at SG are not anti-children (hell, they're tying to have their own), but it certainly can be very hard when you want something so much and it doesn't seem to be happening for you. Women who are infertile do have to deal with their feelings of seeing young children out in the world all the time, as you said -- grocery store, walking down the street, libraray, whatever. But it is nice to know that when you are perhaps the most vulnerable (around transfer, for example) that you know you won't also have to deal with managing those feelings at that time.
I recognize (and know first-hand) that it can be inconvenient for parents of kids to find child care during the numerous SG appointments. My feeling was that we were already shelling out several thousand to get pregnant, what was a little more on babysitting? Plus, I was grateful to have some alone time to read a cheesy magazine in the waiting room. |
Anonymous
| I am in favor of the policy. I'm a repeat patient so I was a patient there before kids and after kids as well. I know it can be a pain to find a babysitter at times, especially for ER and ET. We had a terrible time finding a babysitter for one of my ER's -- to the point I thought we were going to have to ask a distant friend to meet us in the parking lot at SG. Anyway, I think the policy is a good one. |
Anonymous
| I agree with the no kids policy, but also think that SG should try to provide some family waiting rooms or more of an accommodation for parents who have no choice but to bring their kids. Right now, I'm stressing about when my ET and ER will be scheduled, because depending on the time we may have to scramble to do something with my DC. (And no, my college babysitters are not likely to be available, or dependable, to come at 6:30 am to sit for us, if we have to go in that early.) |
Anonymous
| I agree with the no kids policy, but also think that SG should try to provide some family waiting rooms or more of an accommodation for parents who have no choice but to bring their kids. Right now, I'm stressing about when my ET and ER will be scheduled, because depending on the time we may have to scramble to do something with my DC. (And no, my college babysitters are not likely to be available, or dependable, to come at 6:30 am to sit for us, if we have to go in that early.) |
Anonymous
| I can understand how difficult it may be to see children while in the waiting room for yet another procedure. But I think it can also be viewed as an indication that all of these procedures are worth it! And it can work! My other RE's office had pictures of babies all over their walls from former patients. I think it was encouraging!! |
Anonymous
I absolutely agree. I'm not for the poilcy, even if I have been trying for 10 years and childless. |
Anonymous
| I'm 100% for the policy and I have twins. We're cycling again and it's hard to find someone to watch the kids for monitoring, etc. However, I remember the pain that seeing babies/kids brought the first time around. Not every day but I there were times when it really hurt. I liked to think that the fertility office (where I heard bad news many a time) was a safe place where I wouldn't have to run into babies. Sure, I saw them all day long at the mall, grocery store, etc. but somehow the fertility office was quite different and I needed it to feel safe. |
Anonymous
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A fertility clinic, like other doctors offices, should be quite and peaceful and without children--unless they are going for the appointment themselves. People are often anxious while waiting for appointments or procedures and their presence can be distracting. I am not a prude but I wouldn't want to discuss my "fertility journey" in front of my children. Not only would you discuss your journey in front of your children but you would force your doctor to discuss those things in front of them. There can be some pretty explicit conversations in some meetings and children have a habit of remembering and repeating information at the oddest of times.
Arranging the proper childcare is a part of the journey. And yes, childcare centers do open at 6:00 a.m. and nannys do start that early too! |
Anonymous
| Why would you take a child to a transfer (legs in stirrups) or a retrieval (anesthesia)? I could not imagine taking a child to a non-fertility related procedure that involved getting anesthesia. Since your partner is there for the retrieval, he will need to tend to you and not the child. Ditto with the transfer. That would seem to make things that much harder. The stress of tending to a crying child seems like a lot at that time. When undergoing IVF, you pretty much have to plan, plan, and plan. Childcare should be a part of the overall financial and logistical plan. |
Anonymous
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I've been through three procedures and all DH needed to do was walk me to the car slowly. DC is 5 yo and not an infant so less likelihood that there will be crying.
It is very hard to predict ER and ET. Sometimes its day 2, or day 3 or day 5 or even day 6. You never know. And oftentimes it can be early in the morning. So it is hard to get childcare on such short notice. We have no family instate either. So planning is ideal but IVF schedules are hardly held to a perfect schedule. I think an aboslute no child policy combined with the uncertainty of typical IVF cycles makes it hard for many parents who have children. At the same time I can understand the pain of seeing young children when one is infertile. So I was thinking the best idea is for SG to have a family waiting room. If enough women are interested I would propose that to SG. |
Anonymous
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Unfortunately, Shady Grove WILL factor in the cost of the new room into their fees. Maybe they can offer their clients with children a little information on emergency childcare resources in the immediate area. Also, SG could even contract with someone to provide these services for a small fee.
The problem with a family room is that someone will need to violate the "no children in the main waiting room" policy for whatever reason. Someone will need to breastfeed or some child will throw a temper tantrum and need to see their mother right away. GW has a very small waiting room that really prevents parents from bringing children in with their appointments. They do have a larger general waiting room for the internal medicine area that is right outside of the IVF clinic. I have never seen children at CFA and I am not if sure they have a similiar policy. |
Anonymous
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Completely in favor of the policy. They're trying to be sensitive.
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Anonymous
| Find another fertility clinic that suits you or find a babysitter. No one is forcing you to use SGF. |