Who Is Most Out Of Bounds Here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has an old college room mate named Dave that is a bit of a wild card. Dave struggled with alcohol and substance abuse his whole life despite being incredibly successful professionally. I have suspected for two decades that he is undiagnosed BPD.

Anyway, this was graduation weekend and I posted some celebratory pics of my DD ("Audrey") and her friends. In one of the pics he comments:

"Congrats! Audrey is going to USC in the Fall, righ? Looks like she'll enjoy the food there!"

My DD is not fat but she is still carrying a little baby weight around her hips and she is naturally large chested. To say this was out of bounds is putting it mildly.

However, my DH went into a blind rage and replied with:

"Hey Dave, has Susan (Dave's wife) found out about your affair with Nicole (Dave's ex gf) that weekend you went to Chicago yet?"

The setting on the post were public so his wife saw all this. She has called my a dozen times and left horribly unkind VMs accusing me of 'sabotaging' her marriage. I replied with a text once stating take it up with Dave and do not contact me again. Then I blocked her.

I know my DH was wrong to stir the post but wasn't it fair game given Dave's intial insult?

No. Your husband should have taken the high road. If someone stabs you you don't get to stab them back "for free" because it's fair game. You both go to jail.

Uh isn't that called self defense?

If someone calls you a name, or in this case, makes an observation that you like food, you don't get to knife them. Only one goes to jail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FYI troll.

No wife in that situation would speed dial YOU, of all people.

Do better Trolls.

This makes more sense as to why wife was calling OP. I literally can't think of another reason that she'd think OP is "sabotaging" her marriage just simply for existing. Thanks for finally giving a legit explanation, not sure why that was so hard for pps.

My gosh this site is full of such annoying people.

You LITERALLY can't think of another reason?

No? I can't? OP didnt put dave on blast. Op isnt sabotaging wife/daves marriage at all. She's just pissed at the wrong person.

This^^^^^^

Dave is a body shamer
Dave is the cheater

It's always the messenger that gets blasted by the wife.

You're acting like the wife yelled at only OP and not Dave. What do you think the chances of that are?

I'm sure they are getting "therapy" because they are deeply in love and it's DH that ruined their marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has an old college room mate named Dave that is a bit of a wild card. Dave struggled with alcohol and substance abuse his whole life despite being incredibly successful professionally. I have suspected for two decades that he is undiagnosed BPD.

Anyway, this was graduation weekend and I posted some celebratory pics of my DD ("Audrey") and her friends. In one of the pics he comments:

"Congrats! Audrey is going to USC in the Fall, righ? Looks like she'll enjoy the food there!"

My DD is not fat but she is still carrying a little baby weight around her hips and she is naturally large chested. To say this was out of bounds is putting it mildly.

However, my DH went into a blind rage and replied with:

"Hey Dave, has Susan (Dave's wife) found out about your affair with Nicole (Dave's ex gf) that weekend you went to Chicago yet?"

The setting on the post were public so his wife saw all this. She has called my a dozen times and left horribly unkind VMs accusing me of 'sabotaging' her marriage. I replied with a text once stating take it up with Dave and do not contact me again. Then I blocked her.

I know my DH was wrong to stir the post but wasn't it fair game given Dave's intial insult?

No. Your husband should have taken the high road. If someone stabs you you don't get to stab them back "for free" because it's fair game. You both go to jail.

Uh isn't that called self defense?

If someone calls you a name, or in this case, makes an observation that you like food, you don't get to knife them. Only one goes to jail.

Are you responding to the correct poster? PP said if someone stabs you, you aren't allowed to stab them back. I think if my life is in danger from someone stabbing me you better believe I'd do it back and it would be self defense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has an old college room mate named Dave that is a bit of a wild card. Dave struggled with alcohol and substance abuse his whole life despite being incredibly successful professionally. I have suspected for two decades that he is undiagnosed BPD.

Anyway, this was graduation weekend and I posted some celebratory pics of my DD ("Audrey") and her friends. In one of the pics he comments:

"Congrats! Audrey is going to USC in the Fall, righ? Looks like she'll enjoy the food there!"

My DD is not fat but she is still carrying a little baby weight around her hips and she is naturally large chested. To say this was out of bounds is putting it mildly.

However, my DH went into a blind rage and replied with:

"Hey Dave, has Susan (Dave's wife) found out about your affair with Nicole (Dave's ex gf) that weekend you went to Chicago yet?"

The setting on the post were public so his wife saw all this. She has called my a dozen times and left horribly unkind VMs accusing me of 'sabotaging' her marriage. I replied with a text once stating take it up with Dave and do not contact me again. Then I blocked her.

I know my DH was wrong to stir the post but wasn't it fair game given Dave's intial insult?

No. Your husband should have taken the high road. If someone stabs you you don't get to stab them back "for free" because it's fair game. You both go to jail.

Uh isn't that called self defense?

Lol, they give a straw man that didn't even support their opinion. Wildly stupid people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FYI troll.

No wife in that situation would speed dial YOU, of all people.

Do better Trolls.

This makes more sense as to why wife was calling OP. I literally can't think of another reason that she'd think OP is "sabotaging" her marriage just simply for existing. Thanks for finally giving a legit explanation, not sure why that was so hard for pps.

My gosh this site is full of such annoying people.

You LITERALLY can't think of another reason?

No? I can't? OP didnt put dave on blast. Op isnt sabotaging wife/daves marriage at all. She's just pissed at the wrong person.

This^^^^^^

Dave is a body shamer
Dave is the cheater

It's always the messenger that gets blasted by the wife.

You're acting like the wife yelled at only OP and not Dave. What do you think the chances of that are?

I'm sure they are getting "therapy" because they are deeply in love and it's DH that ruined their marriage.

Nobody says it wasn't Dave's fault. But that doesn't make what the DH did ok. OP never even said if the daughter saw the comment so in what way was she publicly humiliated? Did you just make that up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

Horrific treatment? You exaggerate a bit much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

+1
So many people willing to sweep that under the rug and blame DH only.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has an old college room mate named Dave that is a bit of a wild card. Dave struggled with alcohol and substance abuse his whole life despite being incredibly successful professionally. I have suspected for two decades that he is undiagnosed BPD.

Anyway, this was graduation weekend and I posted some celebratory pics of my DD ("Audrey") and her friends. In one of the pics he comments:

"Congrats! Audrey is going to USC in the Fall, righ? Looks like she'll enjoy the food there!"

My DD is not fat but she is still carrying a little baby weight around her hips and she is naturally large chested. To say this was out of bounds is putting it mildly.

However, my DH went into a blind rage and replied with:

"Hey Dave, has Susan (Dave's wife) found out about your affair with Nicole (Dave's ex gf) that weekend you went to Chicago yet?"

The setting on the post were public so his wife saw all this. She has called my a dozen times and left horribly unkind VMs accusing me of 'sabotaging' her marriage. I replied with a text once stating take it up with Dave and do not contact me again. Then I blocked her.

I know my DH was wrong to stir the post but wasn't it fair game given Dave's intial insult?

No. Your husband should have taken the high road. If someone stabs you you don't get to stab them back "for free" because it's fair game. You both go to jail.

Uh isn't that called self defense?

If someone calls you a name, or in this case, makes an observation that you like food, you don't get to knife them. Only one goes to jail.

Are you responding to the correct poster? PP said if someone stabs you, you aren't allowed to stab them back. I think if my life is in danger from someone stabbing me you better believe I'd do it back and it would be self defense.

No I have it right. This wasn't an equal or proportionate response to the initial slight, there was no stabbing. It's not an eye for an eye or self defense. OP even says he was "blind with rage". Maybe the family needs to get over their shame and embarrassment over their daughter's size.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

Horrific treatment? You exaggerate a bit much.

I mean there have CLEARLY been other incidents! OP's wife has long suspected him of BPD! This is obviously not the first offense.

And I guess you think differently about your kids than I do because if someone called my teenage daughter fat in any way shape or form, let alone in a way clearly designed to mock her in a celebratory moment on my public Facebook page I would lose my ever loving sh*t. I would delete the person's post, unfriend them and excoriate them on text and not blow up their life because I wouldn't want that on MY page but I would lose my mind. And talk an incredible amount of crap about them to everyone who would listen. That is absolutely a horrific thing to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

+1
So many people willing to sweep that under the rug and blame DH only.

Who is blaming only the DH?

[Anonymous]

My DH and I both vote fair game on this one. Dave’s an idiot. Insulting a minor is never the way to go, and most especially not a friend’s child on a public forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one guy insults family and fair game is to humiliate the other family?

Who raised you people?

People who don't humiliate other people's kids ...to ad insult, in a very public manner!

And frankly, when you go that low to publicly humiliating someone's kid, all bets are off.

Publicly humiliating the child of the person who knows that you had an affair no less. Dave is clearly a horrible idiot and it is difficult for me to muster sympathy for him.

Do you recognize that Dave also has a wife and kids? What about them?

I don't think its on OP or her DH to have to swallow Dave's horrific treatment of them and I don't think they owe the daughter and wife going out of their way to deny themselves an honest response.

I think the DH was over the line. I also think he was probably seeing red after Dave said something seemingly DESIGNED to make him see red. And IMO this is a lot of justification to get around to trying to protect Dave from the consequences of his actions.

Horrific treatment? You exaggerate a bit much.

I mean there have CLEARLY been other incidents! OP's wife has long suspected him of BPD! This is obviously not the first offense.

And I guess you think differently about your kids than I do because if someone called my teenage daughter fat in any way shape or form, let alone in a way clearly designed to mock her in a celebratory moment on my public Facebook page I would lose my ever loving sh*t. I would delete the person's post, unfriend them and excoriate them on text and not blow up their life because I wouldn't want that on MY page but I would lose my mind. And talk an incredible amount of crap about them to everyone who would listen. That is absolutely a horrific thing to do.

And all of that is fine. That would have been the correct way to handle. DH did not do this.